To feel this way about end of school holidays

[Worriedmum40284]

I've struggled this summer holiday and have been counting down until schools go back for a while. Have a 6yo and 2yo and work full time. Work has been incredibly busy and I've had to work many extra hours, including when I'm meant to have been on leave. Feeling very stressed by it.

I've run out of things to do with the kids, am getting really snappy and impatient with the constant demands from my eldest. He's a good kid but it still feels relentless and there is a constant complaint, ask, or criticism. Nothing feels good enough. Then I feel guilty for reacting badly.

However I've just seen a social media post about 'soaking up the last few days before school' and it's made me really teary and I've stupidly cried in front of DS6 when he's asked me to play (again) when I told him I just needed a bit of peace and quiet for a while.

Here's me constantly telling him off and counting the days down and wishing the time away (and sitting here on MN rather than giving more time to DS). I know people say the time goes fast and you should enjoy it but that seems easier said than done when you're in the moment

my kids are older and I love spending some time and doing fun things.
i work only a small amount of hours from home so it’s just me and then having a lovely time mostly.
But, as they are older it’s so hard to find things to do all the time and everything is sooo expensive.
They don’t really enjoy a playground much these days and won’t spend long at a park so you end up arranging all these expensive days out or activities. They all bicker non stop or just want to sit on a screen.
They need the routine of school and need to be occupied more, around friends more.
I love the school runs but that because I get to drop them off and come home to a nice empty house to work or relax in peace.

I loved the summer hols when mine were school Yr 3 to 6. They are beyond the young demanding stage but still wanting to do family things. I used to hate the end of the hols. I also only worked term time so got loads done in the house too.

Mine are now older (going into y12 ans y9) so while I've enjoyed the hols I've had to work full time and they've been out and about independently. Not the same but not looking forward to the lazy days ending either.

School hols get more enjoyable as they get older.

It’s harder for parents these days, especially if juggling work. It must have been much easier for the parents of me and my pals back in the 70s, got up, breakfast, an episode of Why Don’t You and a dubbed black and white series from Yugloslavia then it was out to play for literally the next 6/7 hours. We’d nip home for a paste sandwich at lunchtime and a beaker of squash. There were few, if any, organised activities, even fewer snacks and as long as we had a bike, rope, pair of roller skates and a bit of chalk (for hopscotch), we were well away.

I celebrated the kids going back. One more week and I’d have been leaving home.

This idea we’re supposed to cherish 7 weeks of 24/7 childcare and make wonderful memories while entertaining them, while
also working full time, in the middle of a cost of living crisis is bonkers.

Your feelings are valid don’t be guilted into thinking you have to feel or behave a certain way.

YANBU, school holidays are hard when they are young. You feel that you need to be constantly occupying them and going for days out and doing fun things. I was always delighted when my dc went back to school. They are now 10,12 and 14 and our summer holidays are great and I hate getting back into the school routine.

We've packed so much in to the holidays (way too much in my opinion) and I'm utterly exhausted! Can't wait to get back back to school and work routine so I can have a rest! YANBU! The holidays are different for everyone. I'm sure many parents are counting the days until their children are back at school.

Please don’t beat your self up, i for one can’t wait for the little buggers to go back and get some routine (and my hearing) back!

Oh yes, the noise levels! Their default speaking volume seems to be set at 'shout'!

It's reassuring that the general consensus is things get easier once they're a bit older, don't want to wish the years away but think we'll all feel a bit more settled next week and can enjoy the time we do have together a bit more.

Honestly, I've always found school holidays really tough. Never understood parents who love them. I adore my kids obviously and we have some nice times but it's really hard having no time to myself for six weeks. They make soooo much mess and I'm constantly making food for them. It's intense. I can't wait till Monday!

I booked the first and last week of the holidays as leave. Literally the day they broke up DD came down with chickenpox so stuck in the first week.
This week DS had a fever at the start of the week and now I've got Covid. Everyone is climbing up the walls and I can't wait for this holiday to be over.
( they did have fun in the middle but mostly at holiday club)

A four term year would be better. No six week long holiday, which was invented to give time to get the harvest in when this was an agricultural world. Working parents could each take a week off for every holiday, and with five/6 weeks holiday themselves could cover most of the rest. There would very quickly be a holiday club set up, probably staffed by trainee teachers learning on the job. Longer at Christmas and Easter, much shorter in summer and a three week break between mid October and early November. Time to go away on family holidays, disperse the peak pricing of August across all the nice months.

I don’t want them to end because I can only really take two weeks off work, and always take the last two weeks. So off at the moment. I never feel like it’s enough.

I can imagine anyone who’s had their kids for six weeks straight might be ready for term to start again!

YANBU at all OP. It sounds really tough, especially if you’ve had to work whilst the kids are with you.

Also mine are 13 and 8 so much easier then toddler and infant school age.

I don't know how you think Covid is an accurate representation of parenting. Many of us were juggling home working and home schooling while not having a clue what we were doing. I loved the first 2 weeks of lockdown where we did fun educational things but it became so much harder as school got themselves sorted and sent tasks home and even harder in 2nd lockdown as the work expected really ramped up!

We only have one child and both were able to work from home so we managed to middle through. God forbid any parents were dealing with having Covid themselves / losing family members / losing work and money / managing multiple children's home schooling. That was in addition to the massive impact that the isolation had on so many people's mental health.

I really don't see how you can think any of that completely out of the ordinary parenting and how people coped is a good indicator of their enjoyment of parenting.

I also don't think that the test of being a good parent is wanting to spend every minute with your child. At various points in life children can be hard work for many reasons. There's no shame in needing a break from that to allow you to be a better parent. Also many parents have to work and enjoy working, you can't lose your whole sense of self as soon as you become a parent. Otherwise what is left of you when your children become self sufficient?

Don't be so tough on yourself. Dd has a countdown clock on her phone for the exact minute dgs goes back to pre school and has had it for the last three weeks. I can't blame her tbh he's been such hard work these last few weeks.

Well bloody said. LilacPoppy, be careful your judginess doesn't seep into your parenting

Covid was a real eye opener to who actually enjoyed being a parent. It's really sad that so many parents want less time with their dc not more.

Nooooooo absolutely not. Covid was an eye opener as to who had the luxury of not having to work full time throughout, either at home with your kids bored underfoot whilst struggling to homeschool them, or on the front lines at personal risk. Those lucky enough to be able to enjoy time with their kids during Covid shouldn’t gloat or think themselves superior.

I could have written your post myself. Thank you for making me feel normal as the mum guilt has been eating me up too!

Who left the doors open on the arsehole containment facility again?