Are you a HSP? Highly sensitive person?

[HSP2022]

Apparently 20% of people are classified as a highly sensitive person.

I'm certain I fit the criteria but do any of you?

Is there a way to get absolute clarification?

Do you just accept that's how you are or have you been able to change aspects so you are not as highly sensitive to certain things?

I hate the term HSP and especially empath (because most who claim to be an empath are clearly not). That said, I think a combination of sensory processing disorder, emotional disregulayion, rejection sensitivity disorder and introversion (and/or other similar traits) would amount to a person being highly sensitive.

What do you mean absolute clarification?

It’s not a medical diagnosis is it? You just read it and go ‘oh that’s me’

My mum fit the criteria. And was generally very draining to be around. I loved her very much, but the whole ‘ I am an empath or just a very sensitive person’ tended to the excuse rolled out for her wanting absolute control of everything. Counselling helped her with that in the last years of her life.

i was devastated
when died last year, very suddenly. But there is a sense of relief and life is easier.

on the other hand she was a person who always thought of little things to make life quite magical.

Theres always going to be good and bad when it comes to people who fit the criteria. But to be honest, it sounds like one of those labels that people grab onto to try and make they seems slightly superior to others, rather than looking inwards.

Personally, I don't really believe that 'highly-sensitive person/empath' is a special category or human being.

I think some people who actively describe themselves as HSPs are simply using it is an excuse for being self-absorbed, intense and needy and are rarely actually motivated primarily by empathy. I mean, even the description above is kind of edging into 'screaming at the Sistine Chapel' territory, isn't it?

We all have different personalities and are bothered by different things, but I don't see why being upset by change makes someone more empathetic/sensitive than someone who is bothered by routine. I also think that anyone who claims to connect with music/art/film on a 'more profound' level than other mere mortals probably needs to get over themselves. Nobody really has any idea how 'profoundly' they are connecting with something in comparison to others, and just because someone is outwardly calm and pragmatic, you don't really know what's going on inside their head at all.

Basically I think the whole HSP/empath thing is partly people seeking validation and partly a bid to put a label on something that isn't actually a condition or syndrome and is nothing more than just being an ordinary human being with feelings and preferences that are absolutely normal within the standard scale of human behaviour. Not everything has to be a diagnosis.

My quickly startled response is a family joke. I’m not an “empath” though.
Did you know that around 1/12th of people are Aries?

I agree with PPs - it is meaningless. I am a CBT therapist and people saying this or that they are empaths or whatever in assessments/treatment sessions is as frustrating as the widely accepted misuse of genuine psychological terms in common parlance. (E.g. “my ex was a narcissist/psychopath/sociopath” or “I have experienced trauma” when you explore it and they have not)

This is the price we pay in the process of breaking down the stigma of mental health issues and democratising the language though, so I suppose it’s not all bad. Just please don’t assume these terms hold any medical/clinical weight.

@Eastangular2000

I'm not saying that you love violence if you're not a HSP but that you're probably indifferent by it if it's say in a film or TV programme

You can always scream at it.

Last time I saw a thread like this (they were "empaths" in that one), one self-proclaimed empath who was so drained by absorbing everyone's feelings for them ended up attacking a bereaved parent before she saw fit to offer condolences.

WTAF?

Same!

Also, Elaine Aron. The Highly Sensitive Person.

She first coined the phrase many years ago.

And that is all it is, a phrase. Not a diagnosis.

No I'm not, far from it.

You know when you have an actual diagnosis label slapped on you it tends to mean that you get judged and treated differently (like shit). Why people are so desperate to invent new ones to give themselves I have no idea.

And I am saying that there is nothing on that list that the majority of the population can't identify with. People have different personalities, it doesn't need to be pathologised. Why are you so keen to have a special label for yourself?

Have you been getting help for your anxiety, OP?

No.

No, I’m not an HSP. I’m pretty blunt in my manner and can accept criticism and see myself objectively very well compared to most. My sister on the other hand is a touchy nightmare who is impossible not to offend, holds grudges, hangs up virtually every phone call and is constantly in tears. She has a very narrow view of what ‘social interaction’ looks like and is one step away from becoming a full on hermit because she finds people ‘too much’.

Well, no, that's balls isn't it? Because you wouldn't have to meet the definition of HSP to still believe that HSP is a valid category, and equally you could just as easily fit the description above and still think it wasn't actually anything diagnosable or uncommon.

The fact that you assume that you would have to BE an HSP to agree they existed kind of suggests that maybe you're not as empathetic as you think.

@ReneBumsWombats
Yup - you’ve hit the nail on the head

I know someone in irl who did something similar - wonder if it’s the same person 😬

navel gazers as my mother would have called them...

@Testina

It's not about identifying with one or a couple of the traits. It's about identifying with most or all of them.

I fit a lot of the "criteria" that you have listed but I think the label is bullshit tbh.

Some people are more sensitive than others, undoubtedly, but it's on a spectrum, rather than you're either a Highly Sensitive Person or you're not. Also, in my experience, people can be highly sensitive to very different things, and the extent to which people are sensitive can also vary at different points in their lives.

Would I say that I tend to be very sensitive, pr perhaps oversensitive at times? Yes. Would I describe myself as a Highly Sensitive Person as if that's a "thing"? No, I wouldn't.

Likewise, I tend to be very empathetic, often to the extent of being overly empathetic. I find the term "empath" utterly ridiculous.

Also just to add, if empaths and HSPs were so highly attuned and empathetic, they would realise how boring it is to most people to hear them banging on about ordinary traits as if they make them superhuman

This calls for a match of at least 14 of the points.

hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/

Actually my post didn’t fit with the criteria, think I misunderstood this. I do find ‘I’m so shy, I’m such an empath, I’m so introverted and deep’ type people to be really tedious. They think they come across as mysterious but actually they’re total bores a lot of the time, and usually not even empathetic.

Sounds like self-indulgent bollocks to me, made up by someone who isn't content with just being one of the normal people.

So no, I'm not that sensitive.