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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to tell our buyer to fuck off?

297 replies

AppleWin · 31/08/2022 09:41

We put our house on the market in March. On the first day of viewings we had multiple offers. We went with a particular couple (even though their offer wasn’t the highest) because the agent stressed that they were very proceedable and had a high deposit so wouldn’t have any hiccoughs with their mortgage - and also because they weren’t a landlord.

In July, they still hadn’t booked their survey or had their mortgage approved. It’s a character property and you’d be bloody stupid not to have a survey (even though we know the property is fine). This was very concerning because, when we had the survey on the house we’re buying, there was a six week lead time. After a few weeks of the agent chasing them and them dicking about, they said that they didn’t want a survey and their mortgage was approved. We thought they were stupid as hell not to have a survey but it’s their choice.

They’ve been pushing for a very quick move and this has mostly been held up by searches and the solicitors. We were due to exchange tomorrow and complete on Friday. As such, we spent the bank holiday moving all our possessions into a storage unit (we have a toddler and a newborn and are now living off a few items we can fit into just our car). We’ve got DS booked into a new nursery from Monday and DH has a new job near the new house (this is two hours from our current house). Obviously our risk but it’s not physically possible for us to have moved out on time with a short turnaround between exchange and completion - especially with DH and I both working full time.

Our agent phoned this morning to say that they’ve changed their mind and want a survey. We’ve told the agent that they had their chance and there’s no way. Even if it’s quicker to let them have their survey than find a new buyer, I no longer trust them not to fuck us around at every stage. We’re not reducing the price so the survey won’t help them anyway.

AIBU to say no to the survey (and curse them to hell for good measure)?

OP posts:
hannonle · 31/08/2022 09:43

Oh I'd ditch them. They sound awful.

MarinoRoyale · 31/08/2022 09:45

Are you buying your new house or renting? If you’re happy the chain won’t collapse, I’d do what you have done - call their bluff and see what happens.

HowzAboutIt · 31/08/2022 09:48

Definitely ditch them. This won't be their last stalling tactic

Blindsblindsblinds · 31/08/2022 09:50

I’d call their bluff

i would suspect that they think the housing market is about to crash (it isn’t) and off the back of a survey they’ll try to negotiate down…

CottonSock · 31/08/2022 09:50

Wow. What a cheek

AppleWin · 31/08/2022 09:51

MarinoRoyale · 31/08/2022 09:45

Are you buying your new house or renting? If you’re happy the chain won’t collapse, I’d do what you have done - call their bluff and see what happens.

We’re buying a new house but it’s a vacant probate property with no individuals involved (professional executor with a large charity as the beneficiary of the will). So only three in the chain.

OP posts:
Hidingawaytoday · 31/08/2022 09:51

YANBU to do it, they sound like a nightmare and I expect they'll try and drop the price at some point. But as you're working full time with a toddler and a newborn then don't cut your nose off to spite your face.

Whammyyammy · 31/08/2022 09:52

Give them two choices;

  1. Exchange and complete without survey
  2. You'll relist property

If they're this bad already i imagine they're the type to reduce offer before exchange anyway

Kitkatcatflap · 31/08/2022 09:55

Bin them off - you can't trust them and the stress won't be worth krt

Frazzled2207 · 31/08/2022 09:58

obviously they have been dicks but do you not need to sell to buy your new place?

if not then yeah I’d offer two choices as above

sorry this has happened. Honestly the whole system in this country is a joke. We only knew we were moving 48 hours before we actually did.
worst week of my life.

LadyDanburysHat · 31/08/2022 10:01

I think you've got it right here OP. Tell them to get on with it or relist. They have had all the time in the world to have a survey. Now is not the time.

MrsSkylerWhite · 31/08/2022 10:03

Walk away. You won’t have problems finding another buyer atm.

girlmom21 · 31/08/2022 10:03

You've done the right thing. Fuck them off if they don't commit to exchange today.

LadyDanburysHat · 31/08/2022 10:04

And just to add, I also put my house on the market in March, and have been living in my new place for 3 months now. Same length chain.

Creepymanonagoatfarm · 31/08/2022 10:08

Surely they have broken a verbal contract? They got it at a lesser price because they claimed things would go quickly? Tell them exchange or buggar off!

Darkstar4855 · 31/08/2022 10:12

What @Whammyyammy said.

Wonnle · 31/08/2022 10:19

So your EA let them proceed without them having a mortgage agreement in principle ?

If they were getting a mortgage the lender would insist on a survey

sundayvibeswig22 · 31/08/2022 10:23

The process here is ridiculous. When I bought my current house the EA said I had 3 weeks to book a survey (if I wanted one). I had already booked one 3 days after offer accepted (I know a surveyor). Sounds like they're stalling. I'd want to bin them off but also wouldn't want to cut my nose of despite my face! It's a hard decision.

AppleWin · 31/08/2022 10:23

Wonnle · 31/08/2022 10:19

So your EA let them proceed without them having a mortgage agreement in principle ?

If they were getting a mortgage the lender would insist on a survey

To your first part, no. Not sure where you got that from.

The lender has done a desktop survey that’s obviously no use to the buyer, as is standard. The buyer wants a homebuyer survey.

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 31/08/2022 10:24

Whammyyammy · 31/08/2022 09:52

Give them two choices;

  1. Exchange and complete without survey
  2. You'll relist property

If they're this bad already i imagine they're the type to reduce offer before exchange anyway

They'll need a survey as a condition of their mortgage, anyone would. But I would put the property back on the market.

milesmachine · 31/08/2022 10:25

The survey a mortgage company will do is usually scant. I imagine the buyers are wanting a more thorough homebuyers survey now.

girlmom21 · 31/08/2022 10:26

They'll need a survey as a condition of their mortgage, anyone would.

Not if they've got a massive deposit.

Wombat27A · 31/08/2022 10:28

If it's an older property, even a home buyers survey is fairly insufficient.

However, having a lot of experience of twat buyers, I'd realist.

They'll try to knock you down citing time as an issue. Sunk costs, etc.

Namedifferentorquestion · 31/08/2022 10:29

Imagine what they will get up to when they get the survey.... reduce please because of X, Y and Z

Nightmare people - another vote for dump them.

AppleWin · 31/08/2022 10:32

Wombat27A · 31/08/2022 10:28

If it's an older property, even a home buyers survey is fairly insufficient.

However, having a lot of experience of twat buyers, I'd realist.

They'll try to knock you down citing time as an issue. Sunk costs, etc.

Haha, they could try but our house value has increased since March.

OP posts: