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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not be a huge fan of dogs..

211 replies

miseryguts1988 · 30/08/2022 19:27

I mean don't get me wrong I like dogs.. I'm not phobic of them and I think they are a wonderful and intelligent species. But I think to own one they are hard work, expensive and just too tying and too much effort to basically have an animal living with you. People put too much trust in them which is why children end up being bitten.. and people see them the same as their children when they're not.. they are an animal.
I dunno I probably ABU but I just don't see why we are such a nation of dog lovers and every dog lover is shocked if you say you're not.
People wouldn't be the same if you said you didn't like cats.. I prefer cats! They are much less demanding.
I think I'll get shot for this post..

OP posts:
Mumspair1 · 02/09/2022 16:22

zingally · 02/09/2022 11:58

I'm the same. I tolerate dogs, I'm quite fond of my friends elderly whippet, but I can't really see a world where I'd want one of my own. Huge tie, huge expense!

Same. We had a very much loved almost child like dog for most of my childhood until I left home. As much as I loved her, I remember all the work and it puts me right off. Now I look at people walking dogs in bad weather, or stopping to pick up shit and carry it for a while, the pain of taking it for a daily walk, the pain of always making arrangements if you are away - I just don't see the benefit of having one again.

123ROLO · 02/09/2022 16:44

I love dogs, I think the sun shines out of my dogs arse, he brings so much joy to me and my partner and our friends and family love him. He is very intelligent and has such human levels of empathy, if he sees someone sad he will whimper and place his chin on their legs or arm, if people get angry at each other he'll try to stand in the middle of them to separate them, he checks on people and other dogs if he thinks they are hurt. He's amazing. But, that's how i feel about him. I don't expect everyone to love him like me and my partner do. It's perfectly reasonable to not be a 'dog lover'. However to actively hate dogs is odd. (I know you haven't said that but a few dog threads on mumsnet have called for dogs to be banned and even culled).

Kanaloa · 02/09/2022 17:20

Culldesack · 02/09/2022 12:57

Who are you to say who has a dog?!

Who are you to say who is questionable or has zero personality? If you don’t agree that many more people have dogs than should have dogs, you’re no dog lover.

LostInSpaceRaiders · 03/09/2022 13:04

You’re not being unreasonable one bit; and I say that as a lifelong dog owner. My dog is my life, she comes everywhere with me within reason, we centre our life around her - we’re in a remote cottage on holiday right now chosen for good dog walks and dog friendly pubs! But could I do any of that if I wasn’t a dog person? Would I do that for another animal or even person who I didn’t want to dedicate my life to? Not a fucking chance!

Having a dog, and that that comes with it is bloody hard work. People buy dogs often for all the wrong reasons, because they want an Andrex Puppy, because they think they’re cute, because they want a best friend, because they think they’re easier than having a baby and they’ll receive unconditional love of a being that won’t then develop their own mind and life away from them…. this has actually been said to me and it drives me mad!

The truth is, that if you do not want to essentially dedicate your life to their well-being (much as you would do with a child), then a dog is really not for you. My dog has a job, she is a working breed with retrieving and flushing instincts, and we use those instincts to give her purpose and focus. If we didn’t do that, we know she would become bored, destructive, exhibit poor behaviour due to not having an active brain and body. That would not be her fault; it’s is entire the fault of a shitty and unrealistic owner when any of those behaviours set in with a dog that has come to them from pup without pre-existing issues. Rescues are then an entirely different matter and increased level of dedication; people have idealistic views that they’re always going to be getting a well trained former companion of an older person who has passed away. 9 times out of 10 you’re not, you’re rehabilitating either an animal that has been abused, and will have trust issues, resource guarding issues, struggle to understand intentions, aggressive behaviour due to fear etc, OR, it’s a dog that has developed issues due to simply poor handling, or a huge change of circumstance for former owners, abandonment etc that will need huge amounts of training and behavioural therapy. Taking in a rescue, should really be considered to be deciding if you would accept someone being released from a youth offending institute or a prison into your home, someone unpredictable, with a complex past, who you need to reintegrate into society and support mentally and physically along the way. It would distinctly sharpen the sense of those going into it for the wrong reasons, and above all would protect the welfare of the dogs involved who end up on a roundabout of rescue > new home > rescue > repeat,

TLDR - Animals of any kind aren’t for everyone, I wish more people would admit they aren’t a dog/cat/rabbit/horse person and just not have one, rather than following trends or buying a designer dog to keep up with the Jones’s. They aren’t play things, they are a commitment for the rest of that animals life. Buy a bloody tamagotchi if you want to be occupied by something needy occasional, or get a house plant!

Culldesack · 03/09/2022 16:37

Kanaloa · 02/09/2022 17:20

Who are you to say who is questionable or has zero personality? If you don’t agree that many more people have dogs than should have dogs, you’re no dog lover.

You didn't explain your reasons for saying more ppl shouldn't have dogs only than it ties people. That's not your decision to make. Unlike you. Dog lovers aren't fickle. You really do have the bit between your teeth with my earlier post. How sensitive you are.

Kanaloa · 03/09/2022 17:50

Culldesack · 03/09/2022 16:37

You didn't explain your reasons for saying more ppl shouldn't have dogs only than it ties people. That's not your decision to make. Unlike you. Dog lovers aren't fickle. You really do have the bit between your teeth with my earlier post. How sensitive you are.

I’m not sensitive at all - I just think you’re aggressive and to be honest a bit hard of thinking. I did explain in my very first post why I think more people have dogs than should - because I think people who own dogs should be those who are well educated about animal care, have very very few ties outside the home so can be available to the dog most of the time, and have extensive funds in case of needing training classes, vet care, etc etc. The majority of dog owners simply aren’t very good at it/don’t really have the time and resources for a dog. And how silly you don’t generalising that ‘dog owners aren’t fickle.’ Why are rescues full to the brim? Why are there reams of ‘no longer wanted’ posts about 1/2 year old dogs on social media? Why is there a post about rehoming a ‘problem’ dog on here every couple of months? Some dog owners are plenty fickle. Me? I know I wouldn’t have another dog, because right now I’m not in a place to offer a dog the proper care. Not fickle, as I’m not changing my ideas on it.

Culldesack · 03/09/2022 18:28

And neither am I changing my ideas. Glad that's sorted.

WalkingOnTheCracks · 03/09/2022 18:36

JurrasicCazza · 30/08/2022 19:56

As with everything to do with dogs, it's not really the dogs that are the problem, it's the owners.

It's the owners who don't clean the shit up in the park.
The owners who don't train their dogs.
The owners who let their dogs run off in the park to jump up at small children while insisting they are friendly.
The owners who let their dogs 'play out' on a busy main road.
The owners who don't clean their homes properly. The owners who come into the office covered in dog hair and complain when their allergic colleague is sneezing.

Nah, seriously, for me, it’s the dogs.

Suzi888 · 03/09/2022 18:49

“Taking in a rescue, should really be considered to be deciding if you would accept someone being released from a youth offending institute or a prison into your home, someone unpredictable, with a complex past, who you need to reintegrate into society”.

I disagree. A dog isn’t a human. They live in the now.
You’ve anthromorphosised dogs, to think they can exhibit some kind of premeditated actions. Any dog can form those behaviours (resource guarding etc) rescues or otherwise. Likening a rescue dog to a maximum security prisoner is a little far fetched.

AlaskaThunderfuckHiiiiiiiii · 04/09/2022 08:52

Not for me, I don’t mind other people’s dogs but I wouldn’t have one for the reasons people have stated here. I work and have young DC, I already have to get up early to get them to school or childcare for me to go to work in community nursing without having to get up any earlier to walk a dog. They are tying and I like my house without the smell of dog or having to clean up accidents.

on the note of my job in community nursing the amount of homes that refuse to put their pets away is astounding whether that be cat or dog, I’ve had cats walk all
over my sterile field and a dogs jumping up my back when kneeling down to work with people and those who refused to let me do what I had come to do until I fussed over their dog

WalkingOnTheCracks · 04/09/2022 11:34

Suzi888 · 03/09/2022 18:49

“Taking in a rescue, should really be considered to be deciding if you would accept someone being released from a youth offending institute or a prison into your home, someone unpredictable, with a complex past, who you need to reintegrate into society”.

I disagree. A dog isn’t a human. They live in the now.
You’ve anthromorphosised dogs, to think they can exhibit some kind of premeditated actions. Any dog can form those behaviours (resource guarding etc) rescues or otherwise. Likening a rescue dog to a maximum security prisoner is a little far fetched.

They may not premeditate, but they learn behaviours. Hence Pavlov.

The problem with rescues is that you can’t know what events trigger what behaviours until they happen.

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