My elderly dad's neighbours are demanding money

[BruhWhy]

About two months ago, some local kids set fire to my dad's fence that runs from the front of his house to the left, and joins onto his neighbour's fence that separates his and their back gardens.

It was terrifying for him, it spread and caught his wheelie bins alight and nearly set alight his mobility car and shed. The fire service had to attend to get it under control at 1am. Confirmed arson, the same kids had been doing it all week.

A few days after this happened he got a note through the door from his neighbour to the left asking him when he was going to replace their fence panel that was burned. He went to speak to them and told them that they'd have to wait a while because he's a disabled pensioner and he hasn't got fence panel money spare, they weren't happy but accepted it.

They've since come to speak to him three more times getting more irate each time because their dog keeps escaping through the damaged fence.

I don't think he should be replacing their fence panel AT ALL, it's their fence and it was damaged by arson, not my dad being careless, if it was my dad's fault I could understand but he didn't set it alight. This is all causing him massive anxiety.

I'm going to go round and speak to them Monday and tell them to piss off, but am AIBU? Is it his responsibility because the fire started on his property?

That's all out of date now. All that counts is what it says on the deeds (which in older houses may well say exactly what you are doing, right, left etc)

In new builds and infill housing there is is less clear and what the deeds say is what counts.

This situation is ridiculous though, they should clearly claim on their house insurance for a new panel. Which won't be worth the excess of course, they should just buy their own fence panel. What happened to their fence as a result of arson isn't your father fault.

Are you serious? An arson attack could be her dad's fault? You should be ashamed of yourself for posting that.

I think he needs to claim off his insurance for his bit of fence around the front and they do the same for their bit.

Can you not step in?
If my elderly parent lived alone and a neighbour started harassing them for money for something that wasn’t their fault, the fuckers feet won’t touch the ground and they can deal with me.

Yep.

Even if it were your dad's fence he still doesn't have to replace it. He is not responsible for keeping their dog contained

But as it's theirs and it wasn't your dad who damaged it, it's nothing to do with him. So they need to stop trying to bully him into fixing their problem.

These people need to make a claim on their house insurance or sue the culprits for criminal damage. And your Dad needs to do the same. It absolutely isnt your Dads responsibility to pay for the neighbours fence. Ridiculous!

Definitely go and speak to them. They’re disgraceful, harassing an elderly guy when it wasn’t even his fault! Idiots.

I’d go round and say you’ve spoken to the HA and a solicitor (there’s one up thread 😂 ) and both have said that neither your Dad nor the HA are liable to replace the neighbour’s panel, but here’s the crime number they will need to put a claim in with their own insurance.

Then ask them to deal with you in the future rather than your Dad as he is elderly, disabled and has been left distressed by this random attack, and that if they want to verify anything you can put them in touch with the HA if they need to discuss it further.

I'd take a 'oh you're obviously mistaken so I'm here to help' approach - smiley and helpful. It doesn't change the facts but it means it's clear you're not being intimidating in return.
I'd also put it in writing and hand deliver the letter when you go to talk to them. Confirm that HA have said they are responsible for the fence. That the damage was caused by a crime not your DF so he has no liability. That everything has been reported to the police and give the crime number. Also that they should not approach your DF again about this. They can contact the HA or the police.

Re 50/50 responsibility of fences. We bought in a new build development (2nd owners) and our deeds clearly state that all boundaries are shared responsibility. Our last house built in 1930s had owners of each boundary. I think the shared responsibility is a newer build thing.

Of course he is not responsible for fixing their fence. He didn't start the fire, he therefore didn't damage their fence, so why would your Dad fix their fence?! How ridiculous. I wouldn't just talk to them, i would tell them straight, in no uncertain terms, that they are harrasssing and bullying an OAP and if it continues they will have more than their damn fence to worry about. Arseholes.

Doesn’t matter if it is OPs dads fence. It’s not his responsibility to ensure their dog doesn’t escape.

OP I’m sorry your dads going through this.

This 100%

At much as you can though approach the situation calmly despite them being twats.

What horrible people

OP tell your dad's neighbours that responsibility for the fence rests with HA and that it's got nothing to do with your dad at all. If they argue, explain that repeated harassment of your dad will cause you to contact the police.

To pp's fences can either be shared responsibility or be allocated to each house. That's why everyone needs to check their deeds. Where I live it's far more common to have shared responsibility (range of home types and ages).

Tell them to piss off.
they are chancing it bullying an elderly man.
Give them the crime number to pass to their insurer and then tell them the next time you talk to the police will be to report them for harassing your dad. 😡

Your poor dad must have been terrified and instead of the neighbours doing what they can to help him, they're adding to his worries?

What absolute dickheads.

Fences are usually one side per house. If it would have been his, regardless of how it got damaged, he would have been responsible. But as it's theirs, they are. End of really.

The OP says the same kids had been doing it all week. DH is a Fire Fighter and it’s not unusual for them to be following the same group of young arsonists around putting out fires until the Police manage to catch them.

What do you think the OPs Dad could possible have done that your think this level ‘retaliation’ is justified?

No, they're not.
It should be on the deeds as to who owns which fence/s around their property

I think the neighbours are mistaken as to legalities rather than trying it on. I can well understand they don't want to have to pay for something that wasn't their fault. And obviously neither should your dad. Yes, go round and politely spell it out to them and mention your dad is already traumatised by what happened without them asking him for money to replace their fence.

Devils advocate? More like the ramblings of a total numpty. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Presumably you live in a naice area so have zero understanding or compassion for those that happen to live in less nice areas where feral kids will cause a nuisance on a completely random basis.

The fire service had to attend to get it under control at 1am. Confirmed arson, the same kids had been doing it all week.

Also, what’s his financial position got to do with anything? You’ve assumed he’s piss poor because he lives in HA accommodation. Her dad could be a millionaire and he still wouldn’t be required to fix a fence that the bloody neighbours own.

Rubbish! What on earth do you mean about "why was the fire started?" Did you miss the part where the OP explained that it was arson, kids set light to it.

Feral kids causing fires is not incredibly rare. I live in a nice area and it still happens here. There is no rhyme or reason to the stuff they vandalise and fire is just one of their methods. It absolutely is totally random.

This was a random act of arson by horrid, feral kids. It sadly isn't a rarity. It happened here to the neighbour's fence. Even though it may have been started from OP's Dad's side, that doesn't make him responsible for a random act of vandalism.

The fence belongs to the neighbour. They pay, and stop hassling an elderly man for money he doesn't owe and doesn't have.

By happened here, I meant in this instance, that OP is discussing.