To be fed up with male tradesmen making funny jokes that are anything but

[Allerlugi]

Carpet fitter came. He starts unrolling the carpet and then gets really serious, asked me if I’d measured it (yes), then proceeds to say it’s not going to fit, it’s too small and the measurements aren’t right. Meanwhile I’m feeling sick about having to fork out for another carpet.

Oh, but he’s joking! He was just having a laugh! The carpet’s fine, lol.

Delivery guys come to collect a mattress that we’re returning. It says on the website that they will bring wrapping materials and pack it up. They arrive and start to say they can’t collect it as it’s not wrapped up. I tell them what it says on the website. Nope sorry, the website’s wrong and I should have wrapped it up. Meanwhile I’m starting to get stressed and wondering how long this will have to take to resolve with the company.

Oh, but they were only joking! Haha isn’t it funny!

Believe it or not I had a third example from the past fortnight but I must have blocked it out.

I’d bet you a tenner that these guys don’t do it with men.

You need to learn to banter back
It makes life less serious.

I think it's a skill some ppl don't have so they complain.

Banter puts you at ease with people.

Just smile back and say OK you can.pay for mine next time then. Instead of getting all huffy and serious. Banter is a skill some ppl obvs haven't learnt. You just show yourself up if your rude and huffy.

If this is your idea of banter, social occasions with you must be sodding torturous. Banter is funny, quick witted and enjoyable for all concerned. These ‘jokes’ aren’t banter. They’re just downright tedious. And you’re right, it’s a skill that some people haven’t learnt. So instead of inflicting their boring, crap ‘jokes’ on the rest of us, they need to accept that they are never going to be good at being funny and shut the fuck up.

I had this with a carpet fitter. I pretended to not understand and freaked him out by calling the store and speaking to the manager whilst the fitted flapped and panicked.

Some people need to take the stick out of their arses and stop being so uptight.

It’s different if the jokes were offensive or something.

It’s like asking someone if you can use the toilet and they say ‘“I don’t know can you?” - it’s not funny at all but it’s harmless.

I work with someone who turns everything into an innuendo which is repulsive and annoying and he’s not funny in anyway but making harmless jokes to try and brighten up someone’s day isn’t a bad thing.

Just smile back and say OK you can.pay for mine next time then. Instead of getting all huffy and serious. Banter is a skill some ppl obvs haven't learnt. You just show yourself up if your rude and huffy.

Was she 'rude and huffy'? Seems to me she was continuing with his 'joke' in the same vein, just upping the ante a bit. But for some unfathomable reason not funny if a woman does respond in kind.

It’s bants, aynit 🙄

I just don’t even bother to pretend to laugh anymore. Just look blankly at them. Those ‘type’ of men cannot take it when their ‘jokes’ fall flat.

I know this is going off topic, but just got off a train, and a young man had his hand down the front his tracksuit. Inside his knickers, which l could see also! Then he adjusted his penis twice! He either is not used to being out of his bedroom or he wanted to make me feel uncomfortable. Another perv across was laughing. Gross

Absolutely this 👏🏼

I have literally never encountered this. I mean I've heard people make silly little jokes, but not pretending to refuse a service.

How is it brightening someone’s day to cause them a moment of panic?

i don’t mind some types of banter. I mean, like if you’re mowing your front lawn or washing your car or something and the neighbour shouts over “you can do mine next of you like!” I mean, we have a neighbour like that and while it is a bit tedious as you’ve heard it all before, it is harmless and you settle into a kind of shit comedy sketch where you know your own next line is going to be “ha ha, I’ll do your mowing after you’ve done all my ironing.” Or something crap like that . But it’s just harmless and at least you’ve talked to each other.

it’s the deliberately putting someone’s nerves on edge that isn’t nice, and it’s certainly not funny. That’s not banter, it’s just weird. I’m convinced it’s mainly a man thing towards women because they are subconsciously wanting to rescue the damsel in distress. Ie fabricate some kind of disaster or problem so that the woman panics and immediately has to think of a plan to solve the issue (doesn’t matter how minor). So then the man can “save the day” and announce that actually there is no issue, thereby causing her to relax again “phew, you had me going there”. In the man’s head he’s been the saviour of the panic and he gets to feel all “big man” about it. But it was only caused by him in the first place.

it’s just very tedious and it’s always people who aren’t the brightest who seem to consider that to be what humour is.

MAN: Can you pay the invoice? ME: No. .... (it's now 2023), ONLY JOKING!!

Have you never watched DIY SOS on TV? I have a carpenter mate and it's constant banter. Nothing to do with women but I agree, if you regularly have to deal with trades people then you'll be on the receiving end.

It happens everywhere. Apprentices get it constantly. It's tradition to send new apprentices to stores etc for a long weight, replacement bubbles for spirit levels, sky hooks, glass hammers, a tin of striped paint etc etc.

I agree that it's power play and I just can't be arsed to pretend to half heartedly 'laugh' any more when it's done to me. In my experience it's semi-adequate men that like to do this to women, for the millisecond of control it gives them.

THIS!!! I'm totally fine with genuine banter. But "banter" doesn't make someone feel uncomfortable and isn't only funny for ONE person.

And sure, Not All Men do it and Some Women do it, but it is much more often men, and usually it's men to women.

I was in a communal WeWork space the other day. Lightly bumped a man as I was walking past. Obviously, apologised immediately. Cue him making "jokes" about how I was trying to beat him up etc etc. Annoying but I smiled politely, apologised again and moved on. Then, as he walked past me later on his way back to his office he had to stop and AGAIN ask me "ooh, it's the woman who wants to beat me up".

Exhausting.

The other week my car was making a noise. Took it to the garage and the man said.. " sorry love cars done, only fit for the scrap yard now as the whole engine is completely broke"

I looked at him and said oh my poor car.

Him .... ha ha ha ha .... only joking love. We can fix it. Will cost about £1k.

Me.... ha ha ha... well for that emotional shock and now my anxiety is through the roof... you can fix it for £600

It's a power play. It is withholding or changing information to provoke anxiety. Tedious bordering on cruel. Immature and dickish.

Oh Jesus this is sooo annoying! I'm annoyed on all of your behalves.

Trying to be a good citizen (thinking I was supporting a sole trader and it was better for the environment) I once decided to buy some fish from the fish man who came to my village. When I asked him where his fish was from (thinking he'd driven down from Grimsby that morning) he replied "from the sea mainly". I think I have some pathetic laugh but it has disproportionately irritated me for months!!

I think I would of gone to another room pretending to phone the shop/his manager...come back and said. "oh sorry for the confusion, it's ok will fit and the manager has said you will fit it for free"

See, I'm with @steelseries - that would annoy the shit out of me. I mean, DH might say something like that to me as a joke but he'd do it with a funny face and I'd roll my eyes. But this is a supposed professional. He wants me to buy his fish. If I ask where the fish is sourced from, I expect a sensible, professional answer.

I think an element to a lot of these interactions is that they're supposed to be professional. So some of the examples on this thread, I would find annoying, but I can appreciate it's a genuine attempt at banter. But the ones where it's someone to whom you are paying for a service and/or product - that's just annoying. My clients would take a pretty dim view of any such comments and jokes from me and I certainly don't appreciate it from people I'm dealing with on a professional level.

They are about as funny as a fart in a lift.