Page 11 | Things have changed so much , so quickly?!

YellowPlumbob · 22/08/2022 23:04

Ellatella · 22/08/2022 22:38

My dad gets high rate pip care and mobility and not a chance he'd manage all that. He'd be exhausted and in no fit state. I'm surprised people claiming high rate are able to do so much. If you see the questions they ask for you to qualify I don't see how they'd be able to.

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And yet, those levels of PIP are awarded for a multitude of illnesses/disabilities, which will all affect each person differently, meaning that what one person with X illness can do, another person with Y illness cannot.

PIP is a cunt of a process and someone saw fit to award it to the OP, who also has an adapted council house.

antelopevalley · 22/08/2022 23:05

Pinkyxx · 22/08/2022 23:02

I do earn over 37.5K however my employer is extremely demanding - sadly my contract requires me to opt out of the working time directive so in essence my employer can require me to work as many hours as they deem necessary but not pay me a penny more (yet childcare goes up...). I pay my rent, all my bills, travel costs, school dinners, childcare costs etc out of my net pay. Rent & childcare account for 70%+ of my net pay.. my rent for a tiny place, crappy area yet is exponentially more than the £400 a month OP pays... so sure call it poor budgeting, but for many it's the reality of not getting subsidized housing or handouts.

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Unless you are on a very high wage, you would be better off leaving your job and getting another one. You have to be earning a lot to make it worth working whatever hours your employer demands. Unless you are in one of those kind of jobs where you have to do this to progress to a far better job as a result.

motheroftheyear95 · 22/08/2022 23:06

Madhairday · 22/08/2022 23:01

I'm so sorry OP for some of the replies you're getting here. The arrogance of some who think they know how 'disabled people' as a homogenous mass are able to work. It must be true because a pp knows some people in a wheelchair who work.

The truth is of course disability comes in all sorts of different ways. I'm disabled and able to work part time from home usually but a nasty case of Covid has put my work on hold. Many people are far too sick to work at all. And of course sick and disabled people can go on holiday, they are not all at death's door and they are allowed to claim PIP and have a week in Majorca, probably with much of it spent resting rather than hiking the hills.

The arrogance and the ignorance on this thread is breathtaking. I'm sorry, OP.

Being the PP you are referring to, I was mearly generalising and comparing working to travelling and how those with disabilities could manage. No need to be arse you knew exactly what I was trying to say.

antelopevalley · 22/08/2022 23:09

YellowPlumbob · 22/08/2022 23:04

And yet, those levels of PIP are awarded for a multitude of illnesses/disabilities, which will all affect each person differently, meaning that what one person with X illness can do, another person with Y illness cannot.

PIP is a cunt of a process and someone saw fit to award it to the OP, who also has an adapted council house.

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Getting high rate PIP because you are disabled does not mean you are automatically easily exhausted. A friend is paraplegic, needs help with lots of things, but is energetic.
Being chronically ill to a degree that you qualify for PIP is different. If you have heart or lung diseases or cancer so severe that you get PIP, you are far more likely to be easily tired.
My mum was too ill to fly abroad. My disabled husband can fly abroad with help.

Miajk · 22/08/2022 23:10

user73783 · 22/08/2022 20:04

I know no one wants to hear this right now. But as someone not born British, I think British people are going to have to learn to live like the rest of the world.* Less meat Fewer foreign hols Fewer pets* Smaller housesNo buying whatever you want

So the few can amass huge amounts of wealth instead, so the Rishis of the world can buy yachts and multiple homes whilst us plebs are grateful for beef once a week and a few nights in skeggy. Na, there is enough out there for us all to have a decent quality of life, if we stop voting the bloody Tories in.

While I agree that the wealth distribution is a joke in this country, British people never like to take any personal responsibility for their financial choices.

It's always "I'll have 5 kids if I want, none of your business", "I'll have a kid right now with no stable employment", "I'll put a holiday abroad on the credit card", then nonsense like frequent takeaways and buying things on klarna.

I'm sorry but if you consciously decide to never save & have lots of kid, yeah life will not be easy financially. The number of people who are struggling due to genuine lack of options (never in a position to save, had kids sensibly but unforseen circumstances) is very low compared to people who just felt like doing whatever they wanted and crossed their fingers that they'll get a bail out somehow.

I've not seen this mentality much in other countries I lived in.

VerinMathwin · 22/08/2022 23:13

CurlyhairedAssassin · 22/08/2022 21:28

The issue is that those in charge or on huge City salaries will NEVER understand. I was thinking the other day about percentage increases in salaries and food and what it actually means for different people. Compare the increase in take home pay in 2 situations, both people getting a 3% pay increase:

Someone on 100k (approx £65,596 take home). Their pay increases to £103,000, which is approx £67,659 take home). This is a take home pay difference of £2063.

Someone on 30k (approx £24,204 take home). Their pay increases to £30,900 which is approx £24,805 take home). This is a take home pay difference of just £601.

The first person's take home increases by £2063. The second person's take home pay increases by £601, quite the difference. For people in the first category it's unlikely, then, that they're going to notice the effects of inflation as much as someone on a much lower salary whose salary increases don't actually MEAN particularly much in real life, who has already cut out luxuries and is looking to their pay increase to cover the essentials of like food, fuel and heating.

The more well off will say "oh well, I do have a large mortgage to pay you know, we NEED that big salary increase." They don't stop to think that if needs be they CAN always downsize to reduce their mortgage. Or change their car from a luxury new one to something more economical. Or stop the pony lessons, or only go on a skiing holiday every other year. Or make a few less trips to Waitrose and M&S, and shop in Aldi more instead.

When you're already IN the smallest house that your family can fit in, in the cheapest area - before your payrise - and when you have ALREADY sold your car to save on petrol and upkeep and when you have ALREADY turned the heating off except for an hour a day, and when you ALREADY shop for yellow labels, or economy brands, or even go without meals sometimes so your kids can eat etc etc, that £600 a year pay rise doesn't actually really go very far at all to cover inflationary rises of their basic spending.

Perhaps it's time to freeze the pay of those individuals on the very highest salaries and maybe they'd then start to feel it a bit.

I think you need a new tax calculator. The marginal rate of tax between 100k and 103k is 62% so the increase in net pay would be £1140. Still more than £601 but nowhere near as much as you're making out.

carefullycourageous · 22/08/2022 23:14

AIBU to have a feeling of almost grief over all of this? It's been very slow and gradual trickling of price increases etc but suddenly it's taken 6 chicken thighs to push me over the edge and be ridiculously angry and upset about how our money can purchase so much less these days?

@doodlywoodlydingdong No, YANBU at all to have a feeling of almost grief over this. I was discussing exactly this with my DH yesterday, we are not so tight as you but I totally understand what you a re saying and I personally think it is a very sad day that one of my countrywomen is giving up their mobility car while the government does fuck all to help.

+ for you.

djdkdkddkek · 22/08/2022 23:19

carefullycourageous · 22/08/2022 23:14

AIBU to have a feeling of almost grief over all of this? It's been very slow and gradual trickling of price increases etc but suddenly it's taken 6 chicken thighs to push me over the edge and be ridiculously angry and upset about how our money can purchase so much less these days?

@doodlywoodlydingdong No, YANBU at all to have a feeling of almost grief over this. I was discussing exactly this with my DH yesterday, we are not so tight as you but I totally understand what you a re saying and I personally think it is a very sad day that one of my countrywomen is giving up their mobility car while the government does fuck all to help.

+ for you.

She’s not giving up her mobility car she’s giving up her Sunday roast joints

motheroftheyear95 · 22/08/2022 23:21

carefullycourageous · 22/08/2022 23:14

AIBU to have a feeling of almost grief over all of this? It's been very slow and gradual trickling of price increases etc but suddenly it's taken 6 chicken thighs to push me over the edge and be ridiculously angry and upset about how our money can purchase so much less these days?

@doodlywoodlydingdong No, YANBU at all to have a feeling of almost grief over this. I was discussing exactly this with my DH yesterday, we are not so tight as you but I totally understand what you a re saying and I personally think it is a very sad day that one of my countrywomen is giving up their mobility car while the government does fuck all to help.

+ for you.

It’s always easy to blame the government, people can and should explore options for themselves and take more responsibility. I do acknowledge that there are genuinely people who in severe poverty and without any options.

Ariela · 22/08/2022 23:22

Could your DP drive 7.5t? There are shortages of 7,5t drivers and the pay is excellent, and he should have historic rights to drive 7.5t

antelopevalley · 22/08/2022 23:25

Is it safe to drive a 7.5 ton if you have only driven a car?

Janesdufflecoat · 22/08/2022 23:25

Bloody hell! The responses on this thread!

Either people are so lazy that they can't be bothered to read the OP's posts or they have absolutely no compassion at all!

No wonder we're in the bloody mess we're in, it's a race to the bottom!

In one of the richest Countries in the world with a husband working 5x12 hour shifts it's not unreasonable to be able to put nice food in your shopping trolley never mind the fact the OP is talking about giving up her mobility car just to hand the money to an energy company already making billions in profit and paying it's shareholders record bonuses!

Please try & hold on to your car OP! 💐

antelopevalley · 22/08/2022 23:26

motheroftheyear95 · 22/08/2022 23:21

It’s always easy to blame the government, people can and should explore options for themselves and take more responsibility. I do acknowledge that there are genuinely people who in severe poverty and without any options.

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Rich people always say things like this. As if everyone poorer just sits around going DUH...

Pinkyxx · 22/08/2022 23:27

antelopevalley · 22/08/2022 23:05

Unless you are on a very high wage, you would be better off leaving your job and getting another one. You have to be earning a lot to make it worth working whatever hours your employer demands. Unless you are in one of those kind of jobs where you have to do this to progress to a far better job as a result.

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That's very easy to say but I have bills to pay and a child I'm responsible for. Jobs don't grow off trees and I'm limited on what I can do due to my qualifications / background and mostly my health conditions. I am perpetually exhausted and don't have the physical capability to go into an office all the time, or travel as would typically be necessary in my field so I can't just resign. I have to do a job I can do, and keep. Shitty as this job is, I can do it even if it means I have zero quality of life & as my doctors say it's slowly killing me... they've begged me to agree to be signed off, but my employer would ''manage'' me out as they won't pay someone to do nothing.. and then where would I be? It's worth also pointing out the stress that comes with working and being responsible for everything yourself without a 'safety' net from the state. It's not about it being 'worth it' or not, it's about it being the best I can do in my situation / circumstances to meet my responsibilities with zero help because again I'm supposedly ''rich''...

Incidentally, even if I could afford a holiday, I simply wouldn't make it through the travel.. let alone abroad and back. Astounds me that people who are too unwell to work are well enough to take several holidays a year or indeed have multiple children.

motheroftheyear95 · 22/08/2022 23:29

antelopevalley · 22/08/2022 23:26

Rich people always say things like this. As if everyone poorer just sits around going DUH...

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Excuse me are you suggesting am I rich lol

Babyroobs · 22/08/2022 23:30

Pinkyxx · 22/08/2022 23:27

That's very easy to say but I have bills to pay and a child I'm responsible for. Jobs don't grow off trees and I'm limited on what I can do due to my qualifications / background and mostly my health conditions. I am perpetually exhausted and don't have the physical capability to go into an office all the time, or travel as would typically be necessary in my field so I can't just resign. I have to do a job I can do, and keep. Shitty as this job is, I can do it even if it means I have zero quality of life & as my doctors say it's slowly killing me... they've begged me to agree to be signed off, but my employer would ''manage'' me out as they won't pay someone to do nothing.. and then where would I be? It's worth also pointing out the stress that comes with working and being responsible for everything yourself without a 'safety' net from the state. It's not about it being 'worth it' or not, it's about it being the best I can do in my situation / circumstances to meet my responsibilities with zero help because again I'm supposedly ''rich''...

Incidentally, even if I could afford a holiday, I simply wouldn't make it through the travel.. let alone abroad and back. Astounds me that people who are too unwell to work are well enough to take several holidays a year or indeed have multiple children.

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I imagine op probably had the children before she became disabled ?

yasminisa · 22/08/2022 23:33

I'm a single parent, two autistic children with learn8ng difficulties, I have a phd. I can't work due to the nature of my childrens disabilities. I have to keep the house warm, one of my children has a problem keeping warm, I'm terrified.
I've cut everything back, I can't do anymore.
I never go on holiday or have days out.
I have carers for my children, but because I can't afford the cost of activities ( yes I have to pay) I rarely can afford to actually use the hours. It usually costs around £100 each week for activities when they are put with carers.
I feel so stuck
It's horrible

GettingStuffed · 22/08/2022 23:34

I read yesterday that 28% of children under 30 still live at home because they can't afford to move out. This is the highest in decades

Mamai90 · 22/08/2022 23:38

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Mythreefavouritethings · 22/08/2022 23:42

Blossomtoes · 22/08/2022 20:33

Your thread’s really touched me @doodlywoodlydingdong. I can’t believe how cruel some of the posts are.

Awful, isn’t it? Someone comes on here to comment on adjusting in these tough times and it becomes a pile on from pious individuals, questioning every last detail. We can all sit and shred everything until that person is left in a dark room with a candle and living on the bones of their backsides but I tell you what, this OP has spent the time and energy they have had supporting others and sharing a valuable skill. Next time OP, to get the baying mob onside, reframe this as an AIBU and write from the POV of a complaining neighbour. Funnily enough, you’ll soon see the tide turn.

carefullycourageous · 22/08/2022 23:49

motheroftheyear95 · 22/08/2022 23:21

It’s always easy to blame the government, people can and should explore options for themselves and take more responsibility. I do acknowledge that there are genuinely people who in severe poverty and without any options.

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I'm not going to post what I want to post as I'll get deleted so this will have to do for you:

You can be a doormat for our Tory overlords if you want but I'm a committed social democrat and proud of it. It isn't because I lack initiative or intelligence or drive, it is because it is the best way to run a high-performing society that benefits the majority. So stick that in your pipe and smoke it.

TheMarzipanDildo · 22/08/2022 23:49

Wow there’s some right knobbish behaviour on this thread.

OP.

TheMarzipanDildo · 22/08/2022 23:52

Janesdufflecoat · 22/08/2022 23:25

Bloody hell! The responses on this thread!

Either people are so lazy that they can't be bothered to read the OP's posts or they have absolutely no compassion at all!

No wonder we're in the bloody mess we're in, it's a race to the bottom!

In one of the richest Countries in the world with a husband working 5x12 hour shifts it's not unreasonable to be able to put nice food in your shopping trolley never mind the fact the OP is talking about giving up her mobility car just to hand the money to an energy company already making billions in profit and paying it's shareholders record bonuses!

Please try & hold on to your car OP! 💐

The “take some responsibility!” thing has pissed me off. I wish the government and the energy companies would take some fucking responsibility.

Mythreefavouritethings · 22/08/2022 23:55

Miajk · 22/08/2022 23:10

While I agree that the wealth distribution is a joke in this country, British people never like to take any personal responsibility for their financial choices.

It's always "I'll have 5 kids if I want, none of your business", "I'll have a kid right now with no stable employment", "I'll put a holiday abroad on the credit card", then nonsense like frequent takeaways and buying things on klarna.

I'm sorry but if you consciously decide to never save & have lots of kid, yeah life will not be easy financially. The number of people who are struggling due to genuine lack of options (never in a position to save, had kids sensibly but unforseen circumstances) is very low compared to people who just felt like doing whatever they wanted and crossed their fingers that they'll get a bail out somehow.

I've not seen this mentality much in other countries I lived in.

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And the disability, the chemo, the rape? Sorry to break into your daytime television version of life on benefits, but between bouts of birthing, holidaying, and generally living life high on the hog, a few challenges have arisen here. You’ve no idea of the timespan involved. Neither do I. The difference is that I’m not going full Jackanory here, nor am I asking someone to justify every stage of their life with me as though this wraps everything up with a neat little bow. But ah, it’s like breathing round here, this nasty little snide peek over the garden fence, isn’t it? 🤷‍♀️

antelopevalley · 22/08/2022 23:57

The rich always tell the poor to take responsibility. It is another way to say it is your fault if you are poor, you have only yourselves to blame, and we deserve our riches.