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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU about dog sitter?

117 replies

Dygger · 20/08/2022 23:11

We have an elderly deaf dog who gets distressed in kennels, so when we were invited to attend a family wedding abroad we asked around to see if anyone we knew would dog-sit for a week. A friend who used to live nearby but moved away a few years ago, jumped at the chance to spend a week here and catch up with her old mates. We agreed to leave her a full fridge and wine in exchange for dog care..

A couple of weeks before we were due to leave she called to say that her request to take the time off work as holiday had been denied and she'd have to take it as unpaid leave. She works part-time and isn't very well off. She wasn't sure she could afford to come if it meant she wouldn't be paid, so we ended up agreeing that I'd pay her £250 plus petrol money. She arrived as planned and we went off on our trip. She sent photos each day of the dog out and about on various walks.

When we got back we discovered that the day after we left she'd tripped over a tree root on a footpath and injured her back. She could barely move, so one of her local friends, whom we know by sight, had looked after her and the dog. Fortunately she was feeling a lot better and was able to drive herself home.

I didn't think any more about it until earlier today when I bumped into the woman who'd helped out. I thanked her. She said she was glad she'd been available to come to the rescue and then said something about her rate for dog-walking being £20 a hour. I was a bit thrown and said she'd be the first person we'd call if we needed a dog-walker in future. She didn't look happy and said something about not normally offering freebies.

I don't know what to do. On the one hand it doesn't feel fair that we pay twice. They didn't even let us know there was an issue. On the other hand this is a village and it won't take long for word of how mean and thoughtless we are to do the rounds.

Do we need to pay the woman who stepped in to help? If so, how much would you offer?

OP posts:
Bananarama21 · 20/08/2022 23:15

No you already paid the lady in question, I would contact her an explain that.

Teacupsandtoast · 20/08/2022 23:16

Your friend pays her friend - she is the one who hired her services. I'm self employed - if I can't provide the service I'm paid for, I have to send cover in my place....I pay for that cover, I don't charge the client

Hotandbothereds · 20/08/2022 23:16

How awkward! Your friend really should’ve let you know what was going on.

I’d get back in touch with the dog walker, apologise but say you didn’t even realise she’d been booked by your friend & ask how many hours she did.

And you need to bring it up with your friend, her complete lack of communication isn’t at all helpful!

Bellisima234 · 20/08/2022 23:16

Yes she isn’t a charity and you owe her for dog walking services and you pay her whatever her rates are.

Hotandbothereds · 20/08/2022 23:18

I mean bring it up with your friend as she needs to pay her! She agreed to her taking the dog out, it needs to come out of the £250 you’ve already paid.

Teacupsandtoast · 20/08/2022 23:19

Bellisima234 · 20/08/2022 23:16

Yes she isn’t a charity and you owe her for dog walking services and you pay her whatever her rates are.

No, the OPs friend owes the dog walker as she was the one who hired her....not the OP

Original poster
Dygger · 20/08/2022 23:22

My friend didn't say she'd booked the services of a dog-walker. In fact as far as I'm aware this women isn't one of the local dog-walkers or dog-minders. The way our friend with the bad back put it was that her mate came in a couple of times a day to look after her and take the dog out for a walk. She didn't say we owed this woman anything for walking the dog, or that there was a bill to pay.

OP posts:
Dotcheck · 20/08/2022 23:23

Pay the dog walker. Seriously.

Your friend couldn’t move, was in pain, and no doubt would have been more comfortable at home. She STILL honoured her promise to you, sorted out your dog with a walker AND didn’t bother you on holiday.

You would be a giant penis is you made your friend pay. I can’t believe you’re upset with her for not communicating ( wtf?!) and also can’t believe the pp who say your friend should pay.

CinnamonJellyBeans · 20/08/2022 23:26

Your dog-sitter sub-contracted her work out to her friend. the arrangement was between them. You do not need to become involved. It's also a little cheeky for your dogsitter to not tell you this was going on until you returned.

Having said that, £250 + food is not a massive amount, so it might be an idea to give the dog walker £100 as a gesture, if you can afford it.

Bellisima234 · 20/08/2022 23:26

If you don’t want misunderstandings like this in the future then get professionals such as Animal Aunts in, their rate is around £100 a day plus a fresh food allowance and if something happens replacements are sent. A lot more expensive but no misunderstandings.

Original poster
Dygger · 20/08/2022 23:30

Let me say it again. The person who stepped in isn't a professional dog-walker. She's just a friend who helped her friend out. I assumed the '£20 an hour for dog-walking' was a strange kind of joke. I'm also assuming that she's miffed that our friend got paid to lie on the sofa for a week and she ended up having to do everything.

OP posts:
Bellisima234 · 20/08/2022 23:34

Dygger · 20/08/2022 23:30

Let me say it again. The person who stepped in isn't a professional dog-walker. She's just a friend who helped her friend out. I assumed the '£20 an hour for dog-walking' was a strange kind of joke. I'm also assuming that she's miffed that our friend got paid to lie on the sofa for a week and she ended up having to do everything.

Just get a professional dog sitter in the future then no misunderstandings.

Teacupsandtoast · 20/08/2022 23:38

Dygger · 20/08/2022 23:30

Let me say it again. The person who stepped in isn't a professional dog-walker. She's just a friend who helped her friend out. I assumed the '£20 an hour for dog-walking' was a strange kind of joke. I'm also assuming that she's miffed that our friend got paid to lie on the sofa for a week and she ended up having to do everything.

So, what's your actual question then? If you think she said it as a joke, then why are you worrying about paying her at all? Surely the issue, if there is one, is between your friend and the dog walking friend

ANiceBigCupOfTea · 20/08/2022 23:58

Dygger · 20/08/2022 23:30

Let me say it again. The person who stepped in isn't a professional dog-walker. She's just a friend who helped her friend out. I assumed the '£20 an hour for dog-walking' was a strange kind of joke. I'm also assuming that she's miffed that our friend got paid to lie on the sofa for a week and she ended up having to do everything.

If she really did do everything, then the only person to be miffed at here is your friend. She should have paid her surely.
All the same, they kept your dog safe and well while you were away.
I'd get speaking to them both at the same time to prevent second hand information and decide how to move forward from there.

Dotcheck · 21/08/2022 00:36

OP
You don’t seem to think your friend was actually hurt?

Original poster
Dygger · 21/08/2022 09:51

Of course she was hurt — otherwise the other woman wouldn't have stepped in and I wouldn't be facing the dilemma I now have.

OP posts:
Dotcheck · 21/08/2022 11:46

Dygger · 21/08/2022 09:51

Of course she was hurt — otherwise the other woman wouldn't have stepped in and I wouldn't be facing the dilemma I now have.

She was hurt, she couldn’t physically walk your dog. She still fed your dog, kept him company and did it in your home which was the least stressful option for your dog. If she hadn’t come over, then your dog would have been in kennels, or a stranger would have been in your home

She got hurt - presumably while looking after your dog and still sorted out walks for your dog. YOUR dog.
She took unpaid leave to do YOU a favour. You paid her 250. If this is a reflection of her wage, then this woman is living on £1000 per month- and is likely in actual poverty. You want her to to be even worse off so she can pay a dog walker who was walking YOUR DOG because she couldn’t, due to being too injured ? An injury sustained while she was in your ‘employ’.

How on earth is this a dilemma? Pay the damn dog walker!

ClocksGoingBackwards · 21/08/2022 11:52

It’s not your bill to pay. The person who employed the dog walker pays for the dog walker.

Quveas · 21/08/2022 11:53

Bellisima234 · 20/08/2022 23:16

Yes she isn’t a charity and you owe her for dog walking services and you pay her whatever her rates are.

The OP didn't retain her services and didn't agree to pay her. The "contract", if one exists, is between the dog-sitter and her friend and the OP is not a party to it. And if the "dog-walker" isn't a dog walker then she was out without insurance etc., which put walker, the dog, and the OP potentially at risk. She may not be a charity, but she also isn't a business! I have friends who do walk dogs for a living and they have to have insurance, declare their income etc. because they are a business.

mountainsunsets · 21/08/2022 11:57

Of course you don't owe this lady any money. You never contacted her or arranged anything with her - this is on your friend. She hired the help, she needs to pay any money that's owed.

However, having said that, if you want decent, professional level pet care, you need to hire a proper, insured pet-sitter to come to your home, not rely on a friend doing you a favour.

I'm dog sitter. If I was doing a sit and became injured, I'd be able to hire the services of another walker I work with and get them to cover my walks. My insurance would cover their fees so nobody would be out pocket, and your dog wouldn't be going out with some random you've never met with no insurance or experience.

I mean, what would have happened if this stranger lost your dog, or it got sick or injured in her care?

Ishacoco · 21/08/2022 11:57

It's 100% down to your friend to pay her! Would everyone be saying you should pay if your friend had put your dog into ultra expensive kennels for the week because she was injured?! She was paid for a job she wasn't able to do, it's up to her to negotiate for help. If she had messaged you and asked what to do, that's an entirely different scenario of course.

queenMab99 · 21/08/2022 11:59

Why was the leave unpaid, if her workplace could manage without her, she should have been able to take paid leave, if they were short staffed, then she wouldn't have been able to take leave, paid or unpaid. The whole thing sounds suspect. Book professionals next time.

GoneWithTheWine1 · 21/08/2022 12:01

It's down to your friend to pay the dog walker. You paid her, she didn't deliver what she promised.

Dotcheck · 21/08/2022 12:04

GoneWithTheWine1 · 21/08/2022 12:01

It's down to your friend to pay the dog walker. You paid her, she didn't deliver what she promised.

Because she was injured!!!! She wasn’t just bored, she was hurt while walking on a footpath. Quite possibly while walking OPs dog.

This is a friend of the OP, who took unpaid leave to do a favour for the OP.

mountainsunsets · 21/08/2022 12:08

Dotcheck · 21/08/2022 12:04

Because she was injured!!!! She wasn’t just bored, she was hurt while walking on a footpath. Quite possibly while walking OPs dog.

This is a friend of the OP, who took unpaid leave to do a favour for the OP.

Show quote history

Yep, but that doesn't mean OP owes this stranger any money.

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