Has the work life balance shifted and I didn't notice?

[forinborin]

A very first world problem, interested in your experiences.

All my friends seem to have an incredible amount of flexibility in their working schedules. For example, if we're meeting for a lunch during the week, they often offer to do something in the afternoon as well (shopping, cinema, some art exhibition or drinks etc). They are able to attend all school events, volunteer somewhere during the office hours, take their parents to medical appointments, have long weekends with leaving early on Friday or starting late on Monday, never mind mid-day gym, or dentist, or vet, or physio appointments.

I am very happy for them (genuinely), but I just can't understand how on earth it is possible. We are roughly at the same level of seniority (and not at the level where our working hours are timetabled), different industries though. All of us working full time, but all my days are usually back to back, I can't even carve out more than 30 mins for lunch without playing tetris with meetings and deadlines, and if I do make some space for personal needs, I have then to work late or super-late, or catch up over the weekend. Posting on mn is pretty much the only leisure thing I can fit in 5 mins here or there that are under occupied for some reason (mainly when travelling between offices).

Am I doing something wrong? Has the working culture just shifted and I am terribly out of date?

My schedule is more flexible because I now work from home. My productivity is similar (I work on lots of small projects with short deadlines and work on each project alone). My boss allows flexibility as long as we hit the deadlines, which aren’t able to be moved.

It’s also harder to take a day ‘off’, because they know it’s easy for me to check messages/emails on my phone. (Whilst we all work alone on our own projects we communicate ideas a lot to each other to get opinions and feedback.) I get a lot of messages outside my hours.

So yeah, personally my work-life balance has shifted, with positive and not so positive consequences. The boundary between work and home is blurred and has become my responsibility to maintain, cos our studio/office isn’t a physical space anymore.

I dropped to 30 hrs, and it’s made an incredible difference to my working pattern. Combined with the fact that I work a variety of shifts (day and evenings, weekends), and being public sector I have a pretty generous annual leave/PH allowance, it probably looks from the outside as if I’m a lot more ‘part time’ than I really am! It’s just that my working hours are often non-standard so I can sometimes use that to my advantage and do social things before a late shift, for example. Or I can spend a weekday taking kids on a day trip or meeting a friend, because I’ll be at work on Sunday. We can also buy extra annual leave - maybe your friends sacrifice some salary to do this. That was how I started to improve my work life balance, and it was really worth the money.

I have several friends who WFH since covid and freely admit to doing very little once they've logged on in the morning and cleared some emails, spending most of their days doing hobbies, watching box sets or completing DIY projects. Some of them are in very well paid roles. It's hard not to envy them sometimes but then I remind myself that I wouldn't be happy long-term in a job I cared so little about.

Very similar to @Mamapep Our organisation has really embraced 'get the work done well and on time' and not so worried about presenteeism/fixed hours/regular working patterns. We have all also made a massive effort to hone how and when we meet so meetings are less frequent and more efficient.

Of course there are core hours and certain things we must be present for and I am always contactable during traditional office hours.

I have quote an odd work cycle in that I work best in the morning then again late in the evening. So if needed, I will scoot out in the afternoon for some of the things you have mentioned and will then work in the evening to get the work done. I only do that if I need to and if it fits in with what DH and I have planned - it isn't an every evening thing.

I know it isn't the same for everyone but working remotely has done wonders for our team and I am a big fan! Just as an aside, our sickness rates have vastly reduced as well.

^ I think there’s a lot of this.

I work around 30 hours, contracted 18.5 but due to covid, work up to 50 if I want to and claim overtime. Of course, this will end soon….

I leave my laptop open so respond to emails at all hours, log on for a meeting etc. I don’t stay logged in and leave the house, but I’ll certainly let the dog out, do my washing etc We get ten mins an hour to step away from the screens completely. We know people take the piss a bit, have showers, blow dry hair, do ironing, there’s not much we can do about it.

Ooh, I want one of these roles. I could get so much done if it weren’t for my job! Sadly I have to log my minutes to charge them back to clients so I’m largely tied to my laptop.

My husband's job is like this to a degree. Very flexible, can always help out with kids during day unless he's in a meeting, watch DD1 if I need to take DD2 to an appointment, leave early/start late, take a long lunch. As long as he gets the work done, no one is checking where he is at any set time outside of scheduled appointments. But this was the case before Covid too as he WFH then too. It does make life a hell of a lot easier I have to admit!

My work is pretty flexible too although not quite as much, but I work evenings so it matters less.

I work across different time zones and mostly from home so I am one of those who appear to be mega flexible. But i work 60-65 hours a week. I have control of my diary to an extent so I can do school
pick up and the odd afternoon coffee date but I also wake up at 4am to have a call with my asia pac colleagues and then log on later than 8pm to talk to US colleagues- none of which you would see!

Forgot to mention that i also have a timesheet like PP so no box sets or similar for me at all!

I'm one of those people who has a huge amount of flexibility. There are certain things I need to be present for and these are non negotiable but the rest of my time is mine to organise.
I have a young child so this makes life much easier as I can do a couple of school drop off/pick ups etc and can attend assemblies and school events.

We've been testing the water with increasing flexibility and seeing if this works for us and our employers, it is fine and presenteeism does now seem like an out dated way to work. I tend to focus my hours on in office days and save flexibility for wfh days. I am diligent in meeting my obligations and delivering what I do to a high standard. Won't sit at lap top endlessly just for the sake of it

I'm now WFH but so busy I barely get time to love, much less watch tv! I put a load of washing on at lunch before I walk dog (half hour lunch which thankfully having dog makes me take) But I know a friend who saw someone at gym with laptop open on treadmill just occasion moving the mouse pad to "appear online". Her words.

For those in these flexible roles - what do you do?

Well yes things have shifted

I have a lot of flexible time since moving to WFH.

I only go into the office one day a week

And outside of that I have found in most professional roles it's not a work to set hours, you do your job and if that's done in 2 hours great. You're efficient and highly productive.

Im in a snr role and only work on average 4 hours a day, sometimes less. So I can be flexible and take extra time at lunch, log off early when needed etc.

I'm a university academic.

I don't know, but it took me about 20 years to find a job that was fairly senior, well paid but not too demanding.

Head of paid search and martech for a large multinational

I think WFH has really shown how much time people waste in the office. Many can get through the same amount in half the time at home because they're not dragging stuff out to fit in with their rigid working hours, or sitting through meetings that have little relevance to their work, or getting caught up in politics and drama, and of course there's also not the long soul destroying commutes.

People can also start work much earlier because they don't have to 'get ready' for work, andvthen sit in traffic for an hour and a half.

It's a healthier and better way to live and work for a lot of people.

Yes, I have a job like your friends. I work in tech. We don’t have time sheets, also have a lot of overseas staff so are mainly remote though there is an office we can go to if we want, and I go once a week for a chance of scene. The flexibility has really changed my life for the better, and I enjoy the work so it’s the best of both worlds.

BA/Citizen Developer for a multinational

I think that a lot depends on the role and /or the company.

I work on specific projects with set deadlines. I can manage my own time as long as I meet that non-negotiable deadline. As I have overall responsibility and once the initial phase of the project is complete it needs no input from anyone else, so I can work when I choose.

I will often work early mornings - take the afternoon and then do some hours in the evening particularly if working on overseas projects.

It may look like I'm skiving but in reality I'm working 50hours plus per week just not a typical 9-5. Everyone else is doing the same as we are fully remote.

I'm currently doing a business plan for a new team recruitment and hopefully the flexible working hours / get the job done well mentality will continue. I have no desire to micromanage people's day.

Not everyone has meetings all day. If you don’t and either just need to do a set amount of hours or a set amount of work, it’s much easier to be flexible and take longer lunches or pop out to things but starting earlier or finishing later.

I think its not just a "work/life" balance, but when in work, a "work/meeting" balance. I see so many people around me spending so much time on Teams/Zoom meetings, meaning that it's hard finding the time to actually do real measurable work. I actively try to avoid as many meetings as possible - if my input can be summed up in a email then that's what I do rather than spend 1 or 2 hours on Teams. This means I have much more time to do the "real" work and therefore gives me more flexibility in terms of when I do the work. Some places have a culture of "must be seen" so you find people actively looking for more meetings to attend to increase their visibility.

I can't do what your friends do for the most part, certainly can't go out for lunch then go to the cinema, or the gym.

I might start the day putting washing on, then start work, put the washing out at lunch time and do some housework. Then work again until I finish then do hobbies. It's so much easier not having a commute. Like insanely easier. I get flexi time and can use that time for an afternoon off for a vet or whatever, but dentist etc is all taken in hours. Personal appointments are not, it's not a health need to cut your hair obviously.

Your friends are taking the piss and are in jobs that clearly aren't actually needed. It's one of those ones made up to give someone a job. Maybe they aren't good at anything else. I'd be embarrassed by that, not pleased.

I am guessing you are a solicitor? Beholden to the 6 minute unit.. I am chargeable too, I am not a solicitor but work in IT for the legal sector and charge clients for my time. Whilst I don't have to account for units I do about 60% of my working week chargeable and have to log timesheets for it. It does make you bound to your laptop but of course there is a little bit of wriggle room unlike I can imagine you would have.