Went out for a catch up with a man who I used to shag when we were much younger. Nothing serious. Last few months we’ve reconnected on social media having seen each other briefly a couple of summers ago. He frustrated me then but thought maybe I was being too harsh.
He wanted to go cinema but I suggested a drive and talk. Didn’t want to be stuck in a talkless situation and actually wanted to see if there was any spark.
Met him locally ( I didn’t want to pick him up as he’s moved back home to care for his mother as she’s a gossip). I actually spotted him ahead of me. Driving so slow - like weirdly so. That was ick number 1. Anyway overtook him when road went into two lanes and motored on.
Eventually ( and it was eventually) he got there. Got into car. Zero spark.
Ick Number 2. On the way he acknowledged every driver needing acknowledgment. Like a full on hand up across me so they saw. I said please don’t do that. I’m the driver and can acknowledge them myself thanks. For the record I wasn’t not acknowledging them. He did it again. I said please stop. He said I’m used to doing it whoever car I’m in. “EX” used to not acknowledge so I did as it’s rude not to. Well you don’t heed to. I’m the driver your the passenger and it’s distracting and weird.
Proceeded to drive and grab a drink and sit and talk. I ditched the drive I’d planned as thought mmm he’s doing my head in!
Ick number 3. Starting going on about the same old issues that he’s unhappy about. Zero progress since a couple of summers ago. I can’t stand people who rehash old issues without doing something to change it.
Then huge ick number 4. I’d seen the flip flops and thought a bit grim but fuck the toe nails. At first I though he’s got a colour on them. Nope just brown. Thickened. Overgrown- hugely. That was it for me. I’ve never had a physical repulsion to anyone before. That wasn’t a lack of maintenance issue. That was full on neglect. Blergh. Considering he goes gym, plays sport and is always turned out I was surprised.
Then I realised this whole evening was about him. Not a single compliment on me, asking about my life, work, family etc. I took my hair down as the air cooled and he said yes that’s better. Wear it down next time.
I said to be honest I’m not sure there will be a next time. There’s not spark for me and we are just covering old ground.
Oh ok. Anyway what have you been up to….. but of conversation and got up to leave.
He then tried to massage me as we left and kiss me. I just said. No thank you. I don’t want that. I’ll drop you back. Tried to give me a kiss. Gave him my check.
Messaged me thanking me for a great evening and for future reference my hair looks better down.
Seriously WTF. Like WTF. I’m wearing my hair up today!!
Honestly I wanted to just get it out cos my two closest friends are on holiday or ill. And they will tell me I’m an idiot for even giving him an hour or so of my time.
I wish I’d gone cinema - on my own.