Heating and lodger

[HarryPotterDucks]

Hello all.

With the massive bills with heating and electricity I don’t know how I’m going to survive over winter.

I have a lodger and obviously as he’s not paying the bills than he doesn’t care about reasonable saving of money.

However this has to be approached. I’m just a softie and probably a bit on the spectrum.

Would I be unreasonable to be strict about the heat?

My normal bills were £110 in the winter and already my DD is £70 per month, just for electricity.

Ive not put up his rent, which I maybe should. He’s paying £400pm at the moment.

I'm wondering if you're taking your frustration and anger out on posters here because you feel unable to do that with your lodger, OP. In other words, you're "kicking the cat".

You seem assertive enough in this forum. Maybe it's time to apply some of that in your home and start getting authoritative where it really matters.

I agree.

The OP likely is unable to communicate calmly and assertively in a timely business like manner IRL - as she has not done so to date - but is instead being passive aggressive and collecting petty grievances to bring blame and resentment into something that could easily be dealt with in a grown up manner.

Two different things…..

I think you know what you need to do, OP, so I’d come up with a prepared statement that covers everything you need to say and have a conversation with him.

He may be grumpy, but he can’t pretend to be unaware that energy costs have skyrocketed, it’s all over the news. He uses electricity and gas, ergo he’s going to have to pay more for it just like everyone else.

I also agree with PP’s about looking at SpareRoom to see comparable prices for rent plus bills lodgings in your area.

It’s my house. Bills included. He’s said to me he’s paying my mortgage…. So I don’t think he respects me

Cheeky fecker, tell him to go get his own mortgage then!!!

Do you actually have a written agreement with him in place?

If he absorbed half the cost it would be at least £100 extra a month

Half the cost of what?

the increased utility bills?

Unless he has full access to the home, half is likely a very inflated estimate.

the only fair way to measure the correct amount is to have an average consumption reading before he moved in, and one after. That way you can work out exactly what he’s costing.

You can’t charge half I pay my daughter‘s bills and 50% of her bill is standing charges so if she brought somebody else into the house she would have to pay 75% on the basis that the other person would only really have increased the bill by 25% absolute maximum.

Half of her bill is standing charges? Standing charges for electricity is 47p a day and gas 26p a day. It’s part of the cost of having hot water and heating. It’s not an exclusive charge.

She (I) would have to pay those standing charges whether she was in the house, nobody was or 30 people were in the house, it’s just part of owning the house.

yes that would be fair. Sadly too many variables like wfh and supplier has gone bust so I don’t have access to past bills :(

Nope.

You are mad to not have a written agreement.

You don't 'owe' him anything but you are well within your rights to put the rent up.

So decide what you think is appropriate, commit it to writing and say that if he's not prepared to pay it give him notice. If you're not prepared to do that, then I'm not sure what posting here will do.

Even if you don’t have access to past bills, you’ll have records of your payments to the old supplier. So you could at least compare what you paid in July 2021 to July 2022 for example, even if you don’t have a detailed breakdown.

So literally if he wanted to be a piece of shit he could probably claim that he was your boyfriend lived with you and contributed towards your household and make a claim on your property.

Could do. And then he can provide proof of the relationship, of which he has none. No photos, no phone conversations, no one in his family will vouch for him. Every single bill is in my name and he has been contributing the same amount, every month.

oh, and also, I have a boyfriend…. Of which we have thousands of what’s apps messages, as well as he’s done heaps of work on my house and all his family will vouch that I am or was his partner, as will his friends, who I all know.

Ok. £80 more already this month.

No I’m not.

He has full access to everything…. Apart from my room, as I don’t go into his room.

I would still get that agreement written up though just in case, strange things happen in the world of courtrooms.

I’d give him notice now and get another tenant. Word the contract differently so that there’s a proportion of bills included as a percentage so that you’re not stuffed by bills on October when the costs go up again

he’s disrespectful of you - that’s why you need him gone

Completely agree with this - pick your battles OP

Yikes! You definitely need to increase the rent if it's already gone up that much. As a PP said, it'll increase more in October.