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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would you find this annoying? (Neighbours)

33 replies

HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 03:23

I work nights from home, a pattern sort of 2 on 3 off 3 on two off so not always getting weekends off or set days of any sort.

Next door has been empty for a few weeks. New neighbour introduced herself to me a couple of days ago, youngish woman, very smiley and lovely-told me it was her and her husband and their little daughters. I was just getting in the door from a run, and was on the 'phone but I ended the call and said hello and welcome and to give me a shout if she needed anything, all very civil.

It's 2 am and I am hearing noises outside-It's a very quiet street, private road, nothing in the way of car traffic as It's narrow and awkward and very little foot traffic, so this is strange. I ignore for a bit but eventually hear louder voices, my dog reacts, I look outside and 3 young men are outside next door, a car parked that they're leaning against, laughing and talking loudly.

I don't think they saw me.

It's now 10 past 3 and they're still there and a minute ago were making repeated, loud 'fart' noises (I don't know how), laughing and giggling)...

Okay I work nights. I don't have any children. They've not woken me up and probably wouldn't even if I were asleep on a night off as my bedroom is the other side of the house.

They're not technically doing anything wrong.

But-opposite me are two very quiet elderly couples. Next to me is a woman of similar age to me who works fulltime and her bedroom is on that side of the street-I am very mindful to be quiet when I am working nights as to not wake her up. They were being loud enough for me to hear them in my sitting room which is at the opposite end of my house, and fart noises at 3 am, really?

As an aside I couldn't park outside my house today and had to park at the bottom of a different street. They have a (small) drive, whereas I have a front yard instead. They're old terraces and close together.

Their car was sticking out at such an angle that I'd have had to have been very careful as to slot it in between my other neighbour's car and their sticking-out bonnet, it was probably possible, but not without a 30 point maneuver that would have been very awkward to do. I think I will say something to them about that. It's annoying and I find it inconsiderate -the fella who lived there before always parked in such a way that it wasn't a problem, I think he pointed his bonnet facing the other way and reversed far enough back, and nobody parks next to their drive in the other direction.

Am I being a pearl clutcher unreasonable to hope the chatting at this hour doesn't continue, for the sake of my neighbours if not me?

I think I'll say something to one of them about the parking problem-previous MN threads have taught me about nightmare neighbours though so I wish I didn't have to!

OP posts:
Nandocushion · 04/08/2022 04:08

If it bothers your neighbours then surely they will speak to the new neighbour themselves? I'm not sure why you'd need to get involved in any way before you even know if it's causing an issue for them.

I'm not sure if you're saying that one of the young men was the husband? Do you know that for sure?

InquiringMinds · 04/08/2022 04:12

HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 03:23

I work nights from home, a pattern sort of 2 on 3 off 3 on two off so not always getting weekends off or set days of any sort.

Next door has been empty for a few weeks. New neighbour introduced herself to me a couple of days ago, youngish woman, very smiley and lovely-told me it was her and her husband and their little daughters. I was just getting in the door from a run, and was on the 'phone but I ended the call and said hello and welcome and to give me a shout if she needed anything, all very civil.

It's 2 am and I am hearing noises outside-It's a very quiet street, private road, nothing in the way of car traffic as It's narrow and awkward and very little foot traffic, so this is strange. I ignore for a bit but eventually hear louder voices, my dog reacts, I look outside and 3 young men are outside next door, a car parked that they're leaning against, laughing and talking loudly.

I don't think they saw me.

It's now 10 past 3 and they're still there and a minute ago were making repeated, loud 'fart' noises (I don't know how), laughing and giggling)...

Okay I work nights. I don't have any children. They've not woken me up and probably wouldn't even if I were asleep on a night off as my bedroom is the other side of the house.

They're not technically doing anything wrong.

But-opposite me are two very quiet elderly couples. Next to me is a woman of similar age to me who works fulltime and her bedroom is on that side of the street-I am very mindful to be quiet when I am working nights as to not wake her up. They were being loud enough for me to hear them in my sitting room which is at the opposite end of my house, and fart noises at 3 am, really?

As an aside I couldn't park outside my house today and had to park at the bottom of a different street. They have a (small) drive, whereas I have a front yard instead. They're old terraces and close together.

Their car was sticking out at such an angle that I'd have had to have been very careful as to slot it in between my other neighbour's car and their sticking-out bonnet, it was probably possible, but not without a 30 point maneuver that would have been very awkward to do. I think I will say something to them about that. It's annoying and I find it inconsiderate -the fella who lived there before always parked in such a way that it wasn't a problem, I think he pointed his bonnet facing the other way and reversed far enough back, and nobody parks next to their drive in the other direction.

Am I being a pearl clutcher unreasonable to hope the chatting at this hour doesn't continue, for the sake of my neighbours if not me?

I think I'll say something to one of them about the parking problem-previous MN threads have taught me about nightmare neighbours though so I wish I didn't have to!

@HillyJilly I am about to try and sleep again (nightmare neighbours too) and just saw your post. You definitely have to speak to them asap, however, not sure if in writing or face to face as I don’t like the thought of future intimidation by whoever those guys are. Hoping you will be okay tonight. Off to finally try and get some sleep. I will check back tomorrow.

HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 04:13

Nandocushion · 04/08/2022 04:08

If it bothers your neighbours then surely they will speak to the new neighbour themselves? I'm not sure why you'd need to get involved in any way before you even know if it's causing an issue for them.

I'm not sure if you're saying that one of the young men was the husband? Do you know that for sure?

Yes, sorry I should have specified that one of them was the husband. He was standing on the drive and the others were leaning against the car parked in the middle of the road.

I won't get involved. I just hope it stops.

OP posts:
BOOTS52PollyPrissyPants · 04/08/2022 04:20

That is not on and they should not be out there at that time making noise as if it is the middle of the day, talk to them about the parking as you have to be able to park outside your own house and hopefully the noise will stop and it may just be that they just moved in and had friends over for a drink.

HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 04:44

InquiringMinds · 04/08/2022 04:12

@HillyJilly I am about to try and sleep again (nightmare neighbours too) and just saw your post. You definitely have to speak to them asap, however, not sure if in writing or face to face as I don’t like the thought of future intimidation by whoever those guys are. Hoping you will be okay tonight. Off to finally try and get some sleep. I will check back tomorrow.

Yes, this is why I didn't say anything at the time. They left about 45 mins after I started this thread, thankfully

OP posts:
HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 04:45

BOOTS52PollyPrissyPants · 04/08/2022 04:20

That is not on and they should not be out there at that time making noise as if it is the middle of the day, talk to them about the parking as you have to be able to park outside your own house and hopefully the noise will stop and it may just be that they just moved in and had friends over for a drink.

Yes, hopefully it could be a one-off.

OP posts:
HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 04:47

Although if they were around for a drink it seems weird to just stand outside on one's drive with people leaning against the cars for any length of time

OP posts:
Nandocushion · 04/08/2022 04:49

I guess you could try a PA comment when you see him or his wife next? "Wow, that was certainly a late night for X, wasn't it? They sounded like they were having lots of fun. Special occasion?" or similar.

Nandocushion · 04/08/2022 04:50

HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 04:47

Although if they were around for a drink it seems weird to just stand outside on one's drive with people leaning against the cars for any length of time

Either they were smoking, or they went out there to continue the party and not wake up his young children (and possibly his annoyed wife).

expat101 · 04/08/2022 04:58

I would wait and see if it happens again. I tend to think with new neighbours, you need to tell them outright if something isn't appropriate, but choose your words kindly. Initially.

ErinAoife · 04/08/2022 05:58

Reg parking outside your house every one can do it unfortunately the space outside your home is not yours. Don't have issue myself as I have a big drive but one of my neighbours have two cars, one is parked on her drive (only space for one) one is parked outside her house but sometimes she can't park there because another neighbours had parked outside her home as they own 3 cars and nothing she can do about it, neighbours told her

maddy68 · 04/08/2022 06:06

I wouldn't say anything. If it's a regular thing then yes but it seems like she's had some mates around. Maybe they were outside to smoke.

The car parking thing ...they can park there too. You don't get a say on that.

If it recurs and it bothers you have a word then about loud voices outside at night.

HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 06:48

ErinAoife · 04/08/2022 05:58

Reg parking outside your house every one can do it unfortunately the space outside your home is not yours. Don't have issue myself as I have a big drive but one of my neighbours have two cars, one is parked on her drive (only space for one) one is parked outside her house but sometimes she can't park there because another neighbours had parked outside her home as they own 3 cars and nothing she can do about it, neighbours told her

It is mine, written on the deeds, each house that doesn't have a drive has an allocated space.

OP posts:
HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 06:50

maddy68 · 04/08/2022 06:06

I wouldn't say anything. If it's a regular thing then yes but it seems like she's had some mates around. Maybe they were outside to smoke.

The car parking thing ...they can park there too. You don't get a say on that.

If it recurs and it bothers you have a word then about loud voices outside at night.

It's a private road, stipulated when I bought the house that only owners or visitors can park on the street, and the space outside mine (being it one of the few which has a yard rather than a drive) belongs to the house. I won't go in all guns blazing of course, that they're essentially blocking my access to it, but if it continues I will have to say something. It's not happened before so I find it discourteous-they must have known they'd made my access difficult if not impossible, just due to the angles of the road and how they'd parked.

OP posts:
HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 06:51

And yes, I'll not say anything this time, and see if it happens again. I guess I've been very lucky so far that everyone on the street has been quiet and loud noises at night have never occurred before. From MN in particular, it seems a lot struggle with similar :(

OP posts:
girlmom21 · 04/08/2022 06:56

Were their noises loud enough to wake you up?

Re: parking, if that's your legally allocated space then yes, they're in the wrong, but I never understand the argument of 'they have a drive but I don't'. If there's enough space for them to have one there's enough space for you to put one in.

TemperTrap · 04/08/2022 07:08

Nandocushion · 04/08/2022 04:49

I guess you could try a PA comment when you see him or his wife next? "Wow, that was certainly a late night for X, wasn't it? They sounded like they were having lots of fun. Special occasion?" or similar.

Don't do this, you'll sound like a prick @HillyJilly 😄

HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 07:09

girlmom21 · 04/08/2022 06:56

Were their noises loud enough to wake you up?

Re: parking, if that's your legally allocated space then yes, they're in the wrong, but I never understand the argument of 'they have a drive but I don't'. If there's enough space for them to have one there's enough space for you to put one in.

I can't be sure to be honest. I don't think so but I don't know.
I could put a drive in if I wanted to, but It's quite a big (& expensive) job and I am not sure-I quite like having a front outdoor space and a parking space.

I am not sure how in the wrong they are-it would be very difficult for me to get into my space but technically not impossible. I weighed it up for a few moments and thought it would be too tricky without risking bumping theirs or my other neighbours car (hers is same set up as mine, front yard and no drive so I park just behind her, we're both courteous of one another's spaces).

OP posts:
HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 07:13

TemperTrap · 04/08/2022 07:08

Don't do this, you'll sound like a prick @HillyJilly 😄

Grin I was half tempted to be a prick and go and say something at the time, but I wasn't sure what and thought 'least said soonest mended' Grin
OP posts:
Geordielass1987 · 04/08/2022 07:18

We have this a lot with our European neighbours.

Beautiful3 · 04/08/2022 07:19

Could you say nicely, that you can't park in your space because their car is at an angle. Would they mind parking futher down, so you can get in? Nothing wrong with that at all.

overitall1 · 04/08/2022 07:23

Am I the only person who is curious about what work you do WFH at night?

HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 07:29

Well we all love a not very good diagram don't we.
Just to demonstrate how awkward it would have been for me to get in the space (without blocking the narrow road) and not bump anyone's car. The street has only just room for parked cars and one car to pass, and only just.

Would you find this annoying? (Neighbours)
OP posts:
HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 07:30

Beautiful3 · 04/08/2022 07:19

Could you say nicely, that you can't park in your space because their car is at an angle. Would they mind parking futher down, so you can get in? Nothing wrong with that at all.

Yes, I will ask them to park it differently next time. I just have it in my head now that they may not be so nice about it, given they don't seem to care about keeping people awake making rude noises.... I hope I'm wrong!

OP posts:
HillyJilly · 04/08/2022 07:31

overitall1 · 04/08/2022 07:23

Am I the only person who is curious about what work you do WFH at night?

I work for a private health company on a 24/4 hour line :)

OP posts: