To think my sister shouldn't ask this

[Tillow4ever]

So I've always helped feed my sisters cats when they go away if she needs it, and she's done mine a couple of times. No problem, I love cats and she only lives a few minutes drive away or 10 minute walk.

Last year I helped out and noticed one of the cats kept shitting everywhere. I messaged to let her know in case the cat was unwell or unhappy. She replied "oh that's just Moggy's name, she always does that. That's why I left a pack of wipes out". I was a bit miffed that she hadn't forwarded me of this, but cracked on with it.

Roll around to this year and I'm helping out again. Message beforehand was the cat still shits everywhere, but they're currently on a special diet so it's really sloppy too. Not exactly happy about this, but what could I say - it's my sister!

Gone round there today and there are 3 lots of shit, 2 ridiculously loose and 1 firm (suggesting 2 cats now doing it) and a puddle of piss directly between the 2 litter trays. No sign of either litter tray being used. They also have a cat flap.

Now I know you'll say I should just say no - but it's family and it's hard when we both do favours for each other. But I'd never expect her (or anyone I wasn't paying) to come round and clean up that sort of mess knowing it would definitely happen on a daily basis.

AIBU to think she shouldn't even ask someone to deal with this and that should she be looking to pay a professional to come in? Or even better, should she have looked into WHY this cat behaves like this? To me it says the cat is stressed/unhappy/unwell as they are usually such clean creatures. And to refuse to use the litter tray or go outside to use it is just weird. I just couldn't imagine asking her to come and feed my cat and tell her there was a chance this might happen.

Hell no - I'd not be mopping up cat shit for anybody. 🤮

I got roped in to looking after my neighbour's cat whenever she goes away. There is never enough food or litter left and I have to buy more, there is often no scoop or bags for the litter, no paper towels, the sink is always filled with dirty dishes and the bins are always left overflowing. The cat is sweet and would find is very stressful to go into a cattery - which is why I do it - but it makes me mad and resentful every time.

I've also (by another neighbour) been asked to look after a kitten with diarrhoea - I found it it really neglectful that they would every consider leaving such a young animal in that state - as they can go downhill so quickly. I was having to go next door 5-6 times a day to check he was ok. Far too much to ask of a neighbour.

Both of you need to put your cats in a cattery while away.

You need to stop being a martyr, find the cats and keep them in 1 or 2 rooms with puppy pads.

There's a child in that house? With cat shit everywhere?

I'd do the feeding and parts I could move then cover the remains of the mess up with wet wipes and leave it, explain it was too wet to lift.
I'd also ask through my online local neighbourhood page what could be making the cats ill and reference the road so the neighbours start to look out for them. Your sister should get them checked and neighbours awareness may encourage this.

Yuk cats crap and children
hardly hygienic.

It’s a very valid point. Honestly, letting animals excrete all over your house is no better than living like an animal yourself. How do some people do it. Disgusting.

What plants does she have @Tillow4ever? If any of them are poisonous/toxic to cats (and there is a surprisingly long list of common house and outdoor plants and flowers which are) that could be accounting for the ongoing issues :(

There is a kid in the house alongside a shitty cat?! Ffs. She needs to take the cat to the vet and it needs to be rehomed if she cannot be bothered to sorts it's shit out.
No kid should be exposed to that. Ugh.

Not sure that I have ever heard of a professional cat sitter - I don’t think there are qualifications in cat sitting so I would say as sister/cat owner you are qualified more than most to look after your sisters cat.
I have a cat who refuses to use her cat flap and the result is cat sick (not shit). She is long haired so this is not uncommon. Our only option when we go away is 2 visits a day from the cat sitter and permanently taping the cat flap open. Yes, there is a risk of other cats coming in - but tbh they would come in regardless of the flap being there or not.

Perhaps your sisters cat has an aversion to the cat flap? Have you seen her use it?

Sometimes people think they love their pets. They make all the right sounds. They use all the right vocabulary.

But actually they only love how their pets make them feel, and they shrug off all the expensive or difficult aspects of pet ownership, like finding out why a cat isn't pooping in the litter box and making the effort to help, regardless of cost.

Yea I would say I didn't see anything/ I cleaned it up and just leave it there for her.

For me i would be telling her to come home...this is too much to ask.

Keep sending her pictures of the situation

Perhaps say that you're growing increasingly concerned about the cat's health and that you think it requires further (any?) investigation by the vet. Tell her how bad it was and say that she needs to address it before her next trip as you don't think you can deal with it again

Mine wants to poo by the sink so we have to keep the door closed

he’s fine he just prefers it but as long as the door is shot he’ll use the tray

tips
litter tray each

if he does it in the one area try to keep it inaccessible

That must be awful. I used to have cats and would clean up the poo as soon as they had used the litter tray as it smelt the house out. And that’s with them doing it in a tray and covering the poo. What an unpleasant way to live for them. And cat piss stinks like ammonia . She’s got to try and sort it.

Poo troll

The very simple solution is to say no to any further cat sitting and to find your own cat sitter for when you need one. There is really nothing further that can be suggested.

There is definitely something stressing out the cats.

It could be something as simple as not liking the litter or not enough trays. It's generally suggested to have 1 tray per cat plus a spare.

You sister is being a negligent cat owner and needs to speak to the vet.

Poor cats.

So… there are two cats peeing and pooing all over the house - the smell must be horrendous. I literally could not do it. 🤢
I’d would need access to throws, a roll of decorating tape for the floors and constant washing machine /tumble dryer access. I would not be sleeping there.

A cat that is happy to poo everywhere when there’s a tray is not going to use a puppy pad. Surely she should see a vet, sloppy poo sounds like there’s something not right.

We adopted a cat that has soiling issues. (We weren’t aware of this when we got him)

He will only use a certain type of litter, has been diagnosed with IBS (after numerous tests to rule out other medical issues) and is on a special diet.

He used to soil outside the box but just in one area so we had puppy pads down. Always did wees in the box. He was worse when we were away so likely linked to anxiety.

It took a few years before we got him using the box totally. Ironically he improved after we got a kitten started to use tray more. Then turning point came when he stayed at a cattery whilst we were away on holiday and he was confined to small space.

He still struggles with going to the loo because of his IBS but his toileting behaviour has massively improved.

We had friends look after our cats in the past but they were fully aware of the issue and we paid them. When his issue got worse and he had to go on medication for a while we found a cattery that were happy to care for him knowing his full care needs along with our other cat.

I would recommend that your sister gets both cats checked out at the vet. Possibly if both are doing it then it is an infection of some sort, if not caused by stress in their environment.

In the meantime gets yourself dispo gloves, puppy pads, wipes and nappy sacks to clear up mess to reduce risk of infection to yourself. Ask your sister for refund of money to cover cost of these.

Tell your sister that it isn’t something she has to resign herself to, it is something that can be fixed with investigation and tweaking what could be potential cause.

These are some of the things to consider…

Cat litter - has she tries different types. Some cats are more sensitive (paws very sensitive) so won’t use if don’t like feel/smell of it.

Cat litter box - does the cat prefers an open or enclosed litter box? Is the box big enough as if too small may not feel comfortable using. Are there more than one box available for cat to use?

Food - has she tries giving different food? Grain free may help if it is digestion/allergy issue.

Medical - need to be seen by vet to rule out infection (parasite) or any other health condition.

Stress - try using plug in calmer. Is the box in a quiet location? Is there tension between cats as soiling outside of box can be a territory tactic.

I hope that the issue with the cats can be resolved, not only for their sakes but for your sister and her family as it’s not pleasant to be living through this situation.

I know a number of posters are saying cat(s) should be rehomed but wanted to share my story so that folk are aware it is something that can be fixed without having to get rid of the cat(s). At the end of the day our pet(s) are our responsibility so it is down to the owner to address the issue and not pass the buck.

Just say no then. Grow a backbone and speak up for yourself.

Ugh!

She needs a tray per cat plus a spare, and they cannot be all lined up next to one another, they need to be spaced out around the house and sat on a decent sized washable or disposable mat in case of 'misses' (though misses are less likely if the trays are big enough, most litter trays are nowhere near big enough!).

And then she needs to find out what litter they prefer.

And then speak to a cat behaviourist, a Certified Clinical Animal Behaviourist - to address any further issues in a multi-cat household. (A vet may refer, but vets are generally not great at behaviour work unless its a specialist interest area and they're a veterinary behaviourist or have done further studies to be a CCAB etc)

Tell her you won't do it again until she has done these things.

''Massively overweight'' , doubly incontinent cats?
Sorry but your sister is no cat lover.
That really is the pits.

The risk of disease from cat excrement is high..Her kids likely have toxoplasmosis gondii from being in that house.

Hope she leaves a big supply of disposable gloves for you to use, @Tillow4ever :(