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Original poster

To expect a water supply at a wedding

65 replies

Shadowmallow · 01/08/2022 10:30

The wedding I went to on Saturday was 'festival' themed, all day from 12-12. We were told it was kid friendly and that there would be a kids' entertainer. Great!

Venue was lovely, in a field with a lake and some woods. The couple getting married are BIG party people and their priority for the day appeared to only be to get absolutely trashed (totally fine), and had spent all their budget on a big stage setup and a couple of (albeit very talented and entertaining) bands.

It was a hot day - there was no shade and no water supply at all. Only two small bars selling beer and cider - the only soft drink options were cans of coke and sprite at £3 a pop. There was a small block of four toilet cubicles with sinks to serve a crowd of 150+ which had ran out of water by 5pm. Lunch was deep fried, super salty stuff with chips - thirst inducing and not substantial at all for a 12 hour day. Of course I took water, suncream, snacks, hat etc. but another kind parent ended up doing a Tesco run (25 min drive away) to get a load more bottled water for all the kids.

I guess they nailed the festival theme! But as a wedding touted as kid friendly, not great? If I'm being invited to an all day wedding at a rural venue in an open field I would have expected a water supply at least? Also they've had 2+ years to organise - it was postponed from 2020.

OP posts:
Lastqueenofscotland2 · 01/08/2022 10:32

I usually hate wedding “bashing” threads… but that is awful…

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 01/08/2022 10:32

As in no water is awful, not your complaint!

stupidly · 01/08/2022 10:35

Yeah. Water should have been accessible or they should have said in advance so you could bring lots.

Some shade also should have been sorted out too

EhatBow · 01/08/2022 10:37

Even without kids I hate any event where the choices are booze or sugar. I also object to paying for water, but I'd do that rather than have to buy sugary drinks. Not for health reasons particularly, I just dont like them.

I don't object to buying drinks at a wedding, buy I would balk at paying over the odds for them!

I imagine it's hard to provide a "tap" as such, buy yes there should definitely be drinking water. I like a good drink up, but even then during the course of a whole day, I'm going to want water at some point.

babyjellyfish · 01/08/2022 10:39

Well I guess they did nail the festival theme, right down to you paying through the nose for even soft drinks.

I absolutely hate it when people blow their budget on non-essentials and then don't provide basic necessities for their guests.

YADNBU.

JosephineGH · 01/08/2022 10:45

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Original poster
Shadowmallow · 01/08/2022 10:46

@Lastqueenofscotland2 I'm not keen on those threads either and I feel bad for posting now tbh. I used to work at a lot of weddings and know how much organisation goes into them. It's really stunned me though, I just can't stop thinking about it today and whether I'm just getting old/whingey! It was a whole day sat out quite uncomfortably in a field. Hate to say it but yeah, we drove a long way and gifted them something thoughtful and relatively pricey that they'd hinted for. Just a bit careless imo.

OP posts:
10HailMarys · 01/08/2022 10:51

In an ideal world they'd have made sure bottled water was available along with the soft drinks, but I'd have no issue with a kid drinking a can of Sprite instead of a bottle of water on one day of their lives to be honest. And I doubt they knew the water in the toilet cubicles would run out that quickly.

So in short, it's not ideal but also I don't think it means the wedding wasn't 'kid friendly' given that the kids were able to run around in a field eating chips and they had a kids' entertainer. 'Kid-friendly' to me basically means that the kids can run around and play and make a noise, and won't be expected to sit for a fussy three-course evening meal or have to sit still and be quiet all day, rather than providing healthy snacks and sugar-free drinks.

FeebasAquarium · 01/08/2022 10:51

My almost teen ds was so miserable at a party recently where the only drinks were fizzy - I know water is seen as basic and not very party but not everyone is keen, personally I can’t stand anything sticky when it’s hot.

EhatBow · 01/08/2022 10:55

10HailMarys · 01/08/2022 10:51

In an ideal world they'd have made sure bottled water was available along with the soft drinks, but I'd have no issue with a kid drinking a can of Sprite instead of a bottle of water on one day of their lives to be honest. And I doubt they knew the water in the toilet cubicles would run out that quickly.

So in short, it's not ideal but also I don't think it means the wedding wasn't 'kid friendly' given that the kids were able to run around in a field eating chips and they had a kids' entertainer. 'Kid-friendly' to me basically means that the kids can run around and play and make a noise, and won't be expected to sit for a fussy three-course evening meal or have to sit still and be quiet all day, rather than providing healthy snacks and sugar-free drinks.

It's not one can though, if it's 12-12 and at £3 each?!

Deguster · 01/08/2022 10:56

That's poor - so easy to resolve too. A quick check of the weather forecast and they could have just filled a car with multipacks of bottled water and left it for people to help themselves. Very tight not to imo.

No water in the toilets is a bit more understandable - I have a friend who does festival toilets and the whole putting fresh water in/getting sewage out is a logistical nightmare apparently (and presumably quite expensive).

But they nailed the festival vibe - enjoying great music in a field while feeling thirsty and slightly soiled.

babyjellyfish · 01/08/2022 10:57

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I've been to a lot of French weddings - and had one myself - and in my experience the absolute non negotiables are enough food and drink. Expecting your guests to pay for their own drinks, even alcoholic ones, would be a massive faux pas.

But in the UK, paying for your own alcoholic drinks was normalised years ago, and over time I think it has slipped further and further into considering these things optional extras. It's a bit like budget airlines. Once upon a time the price was the price. Then you had to pay to check a bag. Then you had to pay to choose your seat. Gradually over time more and more stuff is removed from the ticket price and turned into an option that you have to pay extra for. And when the same principle is applied to weddings, there's more risk that basics won't be provided for, because the venue/caterers will think, "if the bride and groom wanted their guests to have access to water they'd have asked for it", and the bride and groom don't think about it because they're too busy choosing their three bands and getting their decorations just right.

It's infuriating. And one of the main reasons why we didn't get married in the UK.

Where France falls down is not catering for dietary requirements. Vegetarians and pregnant women tend to be a bit screwed.

JosephineGH · 01/08/2022 10:57

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Mariposa80 · 01/08/2022 11:14

Was it a licensed venue? All the tent in a field type weddings I've been to have had either free drinks, or the low key ones have been bring your own with coolers with ice provided. Providing refreshments isn't all that expensive if it can be done from a trip to a cash and carry.

ComtesseDeSpair · 01/08/2022 11:15

In terms of portaloos they may well have originally planned for more and been let down: it’s been really difficult this year to get hold of them, several festivals have been forced to go really under capacity; and with demand exceeding supply in the labour market, getting people to service them at an event has also been tricky. Water supply also sounds more like an oversight, and they forgot there wouldn’t be one and so didn’t plan for the bars to provide water.

I can generally always see the good in something though! And surely if you’re at their wedding these people are close enough to you that you have an idea whether they are thoughtless people who didn’t think about their guests comfort or were likely to have been victims of poor service / oversight?

AtomicBlondeRose · 01/08/2022 11:20

I don’t mind kids having the odd can of fizz but my DD only really likes water and would get through 2-3 bottles in that time, as would I (I drink water all day!). We usually bring our own water bottles with us to places just as a habit but I would expect to be able to refill easily. I’ve taken to always keeping a pack of bottled water in the boot of the car. I hate the plastic use but it’s really not that uncommon to end up at places with no water available. So weird in this day and age.

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 01/08/2022 11:20

I went to a very rural French wedding with no toilets… and an hour away from the nearest hotel (not far as crow flies but awful roads, and I’m a confident driver who lives in a hilly rural area!)
i also have a dietary requirement (nothing faddy/unusual) and all I could eat was some
fruit.

midsomermurderess · 01/08/2022 11:26

No shade? That’s a bit improbable. No marquee, no tree?

dessertsun · 01/08/2022 11:35

You are right. Some people go to great lengths for the extras, and then forget the basics.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 01/08/2022 11:38

There should absolutely have been water freely on tap.

Or at the very least a really clear note in the invitation that there would be no water available.

Who’s going to enjoy more than one or two cans of fizzy drink? Probably not even kids. My son doesn’t like any fizzy (sensory issues) so we’d have been stuck! I do always have water bottles wherever we go but I’d expect to be able to refill them.

Ponderingwindow · 01/08/2022 11:44

I’ve been to multiple weddings where getting a glass of water was almost impossible. Even traditional, indoor weddings seem to assume you want nothing but alcohol or maybe a soft drink.

TaxAvoidance · 01/08/2022 11:46

They charged for drinks? Why?

Fur coat and no knickers wedding
You invite people then you ensure that they have plentiful food and drink with no need to spend a penny (which you couldn't anyway as the loos had no water)

HoppingPavlova · 01/08/2022 11:48

I don’t understand the bars? Were they run by external providers? Where I’m from they would have to hold a liquor license and have a responsible service of alcohol certification, which includes provision of adequate free tap water wherever alcohol is served.

lovesicksucker · 01/08/2022 11:51

Can't see how anyone would disagree with you, so not really sure why you've posted. It's not a conversation starter at all. Just you bitching about your friends wedding.

comealongponds · 01/08/2022 11:52

YANBU

It sounds really badly organised. Water and working toilets are very basic requirements at any event!