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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To say "get a grip"

41 replies

Twistedunicorn · 28/07/2022 19:58

I just need somewhere to rant... at the shop earlier paying part cash (10p,5ps) etc and the remainder on my card for dinner.

I get outside and one my neighbours kindly offered that if we're ever short or stuck to give her a shout, i thought this was really lovely of her but declined her offer as tomorrow is payday and we'll be fine going forward... i come home tell my dp and ever since he's mopped about, banged doors and complained about being embarrassed.

Would i be unreasonable to tell him to wheest?

OP posts:
1950sHousewifey · 28/07/2022 20:03

Wheest? Wheesht?
Why did you tell him the story? I wouldn't have told him because it's embarrassing and for a man this can be very insulting feeling like you can't provide for your family and your financial struggles being known to neighbours like that. I wouldn't have burdened my husband or embarrassed him about the conversation. He shouldn't be a knob and slam things but I suppose he feels humiliated and like he has failed as a man. This is a very sore thing for most men. Nobody wants to be pitied.

Original poster
Twistedunicorn · 28/07/2022 20:04

My mistake it seems I've spelt wheesht wrong... i only told him cause I didn't see anything wrong with it, i wanted him to know our neighbour was being nice.

OP posts:
Ohahjustalittlebit · 28/07/2022 20:08

Are you Irish and mean Whisht? Basically tell him to fuck off?

Motnight · 28/07/2022 20:09

1950sHousewifey · 28/07/2022 20:03

Wheest? Wheesht?
Why did you tell him the story? I wouldn't have told him because it's embarrassing and for a man this can be very insulting feeling like you can't provide for your family and your financial struggles being known to neighbours like that. I wouldn't have burdened my husband or embarrassed him about the conversation. He shouldn't be a knob and slam things but I suppose he feels humiliated and like he has failed as a man. This is a very sore thing for most men. Nobody wants to be pitied.

Most appropriate user name ever!

Original poster
Twistedunicorn · 28/07/2022 20:12

No I'm scottish, hawd yer wheest means be quiet 😆

OP posts:
BarbaraofSeville · 28/07/2022 20:12

Eh? That's a bit of a reach isn't it? I often pay with coins and top up with card if I've ended up with a load of change for some reason, usually at the self service till.

Doesn't mean I don't have any money, it just means I'm tidying up my purse.

Original poster
Twistedunicorn · 28/07/2022 20:13

I've spelt it wrong again 🙃 meant wheesht**

OP posts:
Original poster
Twistedunicorn · 28/07/2022 20:15

BarbaraofSeville · 28/07/2022 20:12

Eh? That's a bit of a reach isn't it? I often pay with coins and top up with card if I've ended up with a load of change for some reason, usually at the self service till.

Doesn't mean I don't have any money, it just means I'm tidying up my purse.

Same I've never thought anything of it, my neighbour was just genuinely being nice and I didn't see anything embarrassing about it, seems I've dented his pride a little which is no way acceptable I just didn't think before saying to him.

OP posts:
QforCucumber · 28/07/2022 20:15

Motnight · 28/07/2022 20:09

Most appropriate user name ever!

Show quote history

Came to say the exact same. I earn more than dh @1950sHousewifey don’t let that blow your mind.

Staynow · 28/07/2022 20:17

What a lovely neighbour. Husband needs to get over himself. It would be a shame if people stopped helping people for fear of them taking it the wrong way/badly. Things are getting tight for a lot of people, there's no shame in it.

Soubriquet · 28/07/2022 20:18

Yeah that’s pathetic. I get some people have a lot of pride and don’t like accepting hand outs but grow up.

Everyone needs help sometimes. It’s a fact of life

Original poster
Twistedunicorn · 28/07/2022 20:20

Staynow · 28/07/2022 20:17

What a lovely neighbour. Husband needs to get over himself. It would be a shame if people stopped helping people for fear of them taking it the wrong way/badly. Things are getting tight for a lot of people, there's no shame in it.

My thoughts exactly, she's almost 70 n went on to say she's been there herself more times than she'd like to admit and if she can help one person then she'll sleep happy... if only more people were like her 😍

OP posts:
SirChenjins · 28/07/2022 20:20

I often pay some by card and the rest by coins - otherwise my purse ends up too heavy with change. Your DH is being a choob - he’s aff his heid and should indeed haud his wheesht!

SirChenjins · 28/07/2022 20:21

Your neighbour sounds lovely 😊

Staynow · 28/07/2022 20:21

1950sHousewifey · 28/07/2022 20:03

Wheest? Wheesht?
Why did you tell him the story? I wouldn't have told him because it's embarrassing and for a man this can be very insulting feeling like you can't provide for your family and your financial struggles being known to neighbours like that. I wouldn't have burdened my husband or embarrassed him about the conversation. He shouldn't be a knob and slam things but I suppose he feels humiliated and like he has failed as a man. This is a very sore thing for most men. Nobody wants to be pitied.

Yes OP what were you thinking burdening your poor husband in this way? Honestly, know your place woman. Probably for the best if you only speak when spoken to tbh.

Original poster
Twistedunicorn · 28/07/2022 20:21

SirChenjins · 28/07/2022 20:20

I often pay some by card and the rest by coins - otherwise my purse ends up too heavy with change. Your DH is being a choob - he’s aff his heid and should indeed haud his wheesht!

Pardon my french but i F*ing love this comment ❤️

OP posts:
BarbaraofSeville · 28/07/2022 20:22

What do people do with their loose change if they won't spend it in case someone they know sees them and thinks they're struggling financially?

CourtneeLuv · 28/07/2022 20:23

1950sHousewifey · 28/07/2022 20:03

Wheest? Wheesht?
Why did you tell him the story? I wouldn't have told him because it's embarrassing and for a man this can be very insulting feeling like you can't provide for your family and your financial struggles being known to neighbours like that. I wouldn't have burdened my husband or embarrassed him about the conversation. He shouldn't be a knob and slam things but I suppose he feels humiliated and like he has failed as a man. This is a very sore thing for most men. Nobody wants to be pitied.

This, and the username, is a pisstake, right?

Ohahjustalittlebit · 28/07/2022 20:23

BarbaraofSeville · 28/07/2022 20:22

What do people do with their loose change if they won't spend it in case someone they know sees them and thinks they're struggling financially?

Ice cream jar here. Kids go in for ice creams when it builds up!

FatOaf · 28/07/2022 20:30

I've spelt it wrong again 🙃 meant wheesht

I'm still waiting to hear what your husband was mopping.

Original poster
Twistedunicorn · 28/07/2022 20:31

BarbaraofSeville · 28/07/2022 20:22

What do people do with their loose change if they won't spend it in case someone they know sees them and thinks they're struggling financially?

I use it as night before payday dinners 😄

OP posts:
Original poster
Twistedunicorn · 28/07/2022 20:32

FatOaf · 28/07/2022 20:30

I've spelt it wrong again 🙃 meant wheesht

I'm still waiting to hear what your husband was mopping.

Good god I'm on top form tonight lmfao *moaping

OP posts:
Burnamer · 28/07/2022 20:32

@1950sHousewifey has some other great comments on threads. Starting to feel it might be a “joke” account

1950sHousewifey · 28/07/2022 20:36

I can't be the only one who knows not all comments are worth repeating especially if they could be upsetting!
If op and her husband had no financial troubles, the comment would be amusing as I have paid in small change to get rid of their weight from my purse but if you know you are hard up I just wouldn't say it to my husband.

Yes unless everyone is liberally-minded and thinks like you it must a joke @Burnamer ok Sherlock.

Soubriquet · 28/07/2022 20:40

So you wouldn’t say to your own husband “oh Linda was so lovely today. She offered to lend us money if we needed it.”

Just in case you upset the poor petal