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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Secret confessions thread

999 replies

colourPink · 27/07/2022 20:13

Okay, so, we all have these thoughts; things we know we DEFINITELY are being unreasonable about and yet we can't help but think them.

This is that thread. A chance to say whatever you want judgement free. You know it's silly, you know it makes no sense but it's how you feel. Feel free to share! It might make me feel a little less crazy.

I'll go first...

My best friend gave birth to twins today and I am INSANELY jealous. Simply because I want twins. I know it's stupid, I know I likely won't even have twins but I want them so badly and now she has them. I feel like she's stolen the twin dust and there will be none left for me!

Like I said - just somewhere to post how you're feeling consequence free Smile

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
thatsnotmynamec · 28/07/2022 07:42

I wished for something exciting to happen as I was bored. We had a serious house fire , we have to live in temporary accommodation for a year and have lost nearly all our possessions. I've stopped wishing for things.

The thought of people picking their nose makes me gip. I pick my own nose.

I want to be a comedian but I'm too too scared to try.

NannyOggsWhiskyStash · 28/07/2022 07:45

FrothyThoughts · 27/07/2022 20:54

I fantasise about being a YouTuber. I'd have a book vlog and I have loads of video ideas and I think it would be fun.

But I'd also feel like a twat filming myself and would cringe if anyone who knew me watched it.

So it's never going to happen...but still I'm thinking of ideas for 5 Classics Not Worth the Hype or Best Books about Time travel

Please do! Personally I would love to hear more about those excellent topics

allthatglimmers · 28/07/2022 07:47

Paintsplat · 27/07/2022 21:16

While I'm happy to be in my relationship, I do sometimes wonder if that were to change if I could ever bring myself to leave - the reason being I don't feel I have an 'anchor'. I have very little family who wouldn't make the effort to keep in touch if I moved away. I don't have any links to my home town, and no one set group of friends. If I didn't have a partner I could honestly disappear and no one would really notice. I remember being aware of it when I was younger and single, and being part of something while in a relationship was an unexpected benefit that i'd struggle to let go of now.

I'm not suggesting that I think no one cares about me, just that I'm independent and transient enough that I think people would assume I'm fine/lost touch!

Paintsplat I feel very similarly, there’s very little to tie me to where I live now other than my husband and his family. I adore him but worry what would happen if we ever did separate.

BettyBlueCheese · 28/07/2022 07:48

twin33 · 28/07/2022 00:15

My relationship looks perfect on the outside, 6 bed house, 2 cars, husband earns 80k, ive been a SAHM for many years but it's been 26 years of hell. Ive hidden it well but it's taken it's toll on my health. Nobody knows how controlling and abusive he is. I'm always on eggshells. People don't realise what a wreck I am. The house is a tip because I just can't find the energy to clean and tidy. It takes a lot out of me to get up every day and just get by. I'm constantly told I'm fat, lazy and not good enough. We've been in separate rooms for over 15 years. I'm so glad to have my own room. I could afford a new bed recently due to a small inheritance, before that it was the sofa or a mouldy lumpy single bed. Nobody has a clue what is going on. He earns over 80k, I recently got a part time job so earn around 10k, he wants me to contribute to bills etc. I can barely afford shopping and other miscellaneous stuff. He tells me how rubbish I am because I can only earn minimum wage. I'm a big let down. He has berated me for having no ambition etc but has puts tight restrictions on when and where I can work incase it inconveniences him and his job. I have to cook tea on time etc. His family have mentioned me not having a job for years, looking at me like I can't be bothered and living off my husband they don't know the situation and I'm always covering up. Today I was so frustrated and distracted by his behaviour I wanted to stab myself in the arm. It just felt the right thing to do but I suddenly snapped out of it. I have to live like this or I can't live with my children, it's a cruel choice. My husband is a heartless bastard. Nobody knows his dark temper and dark moods. I've wasted so much of my life on him being loyal and supportive. He cheated on me years ago, I could never do that. He treats me disrespectfully all the time. My work is exhausting but it is a great place to go and escape to for a few hours. Coming home is like walking under a black cloud. I needed to get all that out.

I'm so sorry you are going through this

drawacircleroundit · 28/07/2022 07:52

StarlightLady · 28/07/2022 07:25

In the warmer weather, l often go out without any knickers on. Including fairly regularly at work.

Don’t you find that there’s then nothing to absorb the groin sweat which will then go onto your clothes?

Northernparent68 · 28/07/2022 07:52

HelpMeGetThrough · 28/07/2022 06:51

I confess that I'm working on destroying a specific persons life. When I'm done, he'll wonder what the fuck has happened.

I neither feel guilty for doing this or will lose any sleep over it once done.

What did he do to you

andi62 · 28/07/2022 07:52

That one day a solicitor will contact me and tell me that my father, who I've never known (I was forcibly adopted in 1962, he is according to legend, Irish) has died and left me a big country estate and a few million quid/ euros.

HyperionWarbonnet · 28/07/2022 07:53

I have too many and would fill the entire thread!

Whatsthisallaboutconfused · 28/07/2022 07:55

PGordino · 27/07/2022 23:55

@Angelinflipflops . No, I don’t. I was 30 when she was born and it was still another 15 years before we knew she existed. My poor mother!

Nobody knows how I feel, by the way. I’m as polite and friendly as I can be and paid her last set of school fees after my father died. Which made her more determined that we should be the best of besties, unfortunately. Gratitude can be most inconvenient.

Even when she texted me with best wishes because she’d heard I had COVID recently, I thought “oh, go away.”

Yep. I’m a bitch. Oh well. Sorry.

OMG you’re not a bitch at all! My family is a bit complicated too and one of my siblings had a family member contact her after many many years. Think estranged dads, deserting partners, dead half siblings etc. all very exhausting. Honestly my sibling wants none of the newcomer. They’ve had enough and want to be left alone and I don’t blame them. It’s really tough, trying to be kind but also keep boundaries….

Original poster
colourPink · 28/07/2022 07:57

PyongyangKipperbang · 27/07/2022 23:34

I hate work. Any sort of work.

I am lazy and I want to get a huge windfall that will allow me to fully indulge my laziness. I want to spend my days reading/listening to books and cooking. I dont want to do another load of washing, washing up, making school lunches, hoovering, tidying, cleaning the bog ever again. I want to be able to afford to pay other people to do all of that for me.

I want to be a fucking lazy cow who floats around in a chiffon kaftan (think Patsy's mother in Ab Fab) drinking Chablis at 10 am and taking young lovers.

Good this is the team. Nothing beats a golf glass of Chablis

OP posts:
JarvisCockersRightEyebrow · 28/07/2022 08:00

I don’t like any of my SILs.
My mum’s behaviour towards my sister is vile.
I don’t really fancy my H, although I love him
I’m probably gay

StarlightLady · 28/07/2022 08:01

@drawacircleroundit - quite the opposite, it’s like having an air conditioned undercarriage. I’ve gone knicker free on many a summer day for years. Only with summer dresses and skirts though obviously.

88milesanhour · 28/07/2022 08:01

I sometimes tell dh I'm going to the gym but actually buy chocolate, hide in my car and watch youtube whilst he puts our toddler to bed.... I can't be the only one?! 😄

Reallenow · 28/07/2022 08:04

I secretly do kind things for other people. Make their life easier, give them some good luck etc. I particularly like helping the downtrodden or picked on. I love seeing them with money, or respect or hope in their eyes. At least two of these people don’t really like me but that’s OK- I would find anyone knowing or saying thank you excruciatingly embarrassing.

I have a large network of friends that I talk to every day but don’t see often, due to work.

Lovemusic33 · 28/07/2022 08:08

A great thread, I have way too many to list and would probably need to name change. I think I’m going to Hell 😬

KeanuReevesismylover · 28/07/2022 08:20

Great thread, cathartic
I’m secretly obsessed about my 18 year old DD’s first boyfriend and their relationship. I’ve been stalking him on twitter. I think I’m just envious of her experiencing the joy of first love as I am in a sexless marriage, my choice as my husband gives me the ick but iI haven’t got the heart or balls to leave him.

BalloonsAndWhistles · 28/07/2022 08:25

This reply has been deleted

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JudithandHolofernesHead · 28/07/2022 08:25

Although we have much in common, I am fed-up of accommodating DHs mental health issues. His paranoia and anxiety take up far too much of my energy. He also uses the MH stuff to get out of behaving badly. It's so tiring and I want out.

My sister in law thinks she is better than all of us in the family. She's a judgemental bitch.

I hate my boss. Not because he's a tyrant, but because his positive looking, matey, chatty persona gives me the rage. I am not his f*cking friend. Also, none of my colleagues are friends, despite their best efforts to be so.

I think the religious are delusional.

DillonPanthersTexas · 28/07/2022 08:26

I’m going to judge you despite what the OP says. That’s disgraceful behaviour and you don’t deserve to be married. Stop treating your husband like that. You’ll never end up happy.

What's wrong with having a crush?

Bintymcbintface · 28/07/2022 08:27

My sister has a big mole on her chin, nothing wrong with that. It has a crop of thick coarse hairs sprouting from it that turn me and every time I see her I wanna yell for fucks sake pluck that!

YouShouldBeDancingYeah · 28/07/2022 08:27

I’m glad my not so “D” H is dead. He was emotionally abusive and put me through hell. I pretend to our kids that I mourn him but nothing could be further from the truth. The first thought that went through my mind when I heard the news was “I’m free”.

Pavlovascat · 28/07/2022 08:29

Being diagnosed with coeliac disease is the best thing that ever happened to me as I now have a medical excuse not to eat at MILs house or eat any food she prepares.

Shea the sort to cook a roast chicken, or a lasagne and leave it in the oven for 3/4 days instead of the fridge “it’s in the oven, the door is shut!” or cook a stew and leave it on the hob in all weathers for up to a week, reheating it each day.

I mean, I never ate the rancid stuff anyway, but at least now I have a cast iron excuse.

Everyone felt sorry for me being diagnosed at the age of 41, having to change my diet. They will never know how secretly pleased I was.

MichellefromEastenders · 28/07/2022 08:29

My 80-yr-old mum has asked me on numerous occasions if I can get her some weed as she's always wanted to try it. I haven't smoked any for about 30 years. To the kids she is a loving, suburban innocent granny (and she is, pretty much)...

Please make your mum's day and supply her with some - 80 years on the Earth is a great time to try a contemplative herb like the sacred weed! It will be good for her aches and pains and her outlook in general. All OAPs should have access! xxx p.s.. vape it pure (no tobacco required) there's no need to smoke it - you can buy vapes for dry flower herb online from uk websites :-)

Pavlovascat · 28/07/2022 08:30

88milesanhour · 28/07/2022 08:01

I sometimes tell dh I'm going to the gym but actually buy chocolate, hide in my car and watch youtube whilst he puts our toddler to bed.... I can't be the only one?! 😄

Hello there, twin!

PotteringPondering · 28/07/2022 08:31

Chatterbait · 27/07/2022 22:29

My arse isn’t hanging out of the window; that’s the whole point! I’m facing front-ways and anyone going past doesn’t know what’s going on at the back 😁

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Clandestine sauciness... and well-judged use of a semi-colon. Heck, I think I've just met my perfect woman😘

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