To ask visitors to please do this?

[925XX]

Remove their shoes. I have very pale cream carpets and no one in the household wears shoes in the house. My niece recently called and it was heavily raining, she had cork sole shoes on which sucked up lots of water which she tramped over my carpets. I asked her to take them off as wet soggy prints were being left behind. I do not have to ask some people but feel awkward when I do ask.

I'm surprised! I thought most mumsnetters shower every leap year and don't smell.

Wearing shoes is more comfortable for me than just socks. Indoors I wear structured slippers that feel pretty much like shoes.

It's rude to ask people to take off their shoes.

Provide a doormat for wiping and don't have a home where how it looks is more important than who's in it.

Shoes and comfort more important than their furnishings.

Your choice.

We'll quite. I'm not sure why you have such a view on what others do in their own homes.

The immune system argument pretty much admits it's not clean, hence why it boosts your immune system (bacteria).

Perfectly clean isn't actually a desirable state, which is where the immune system argument comes in.

Would you be ok with wearing shoes on your couch, since it's perfectly clean

Its just not something I tend to do.
But floors are different to furnishings and the argument against it would be as much about proximity to others sitting down rather anything else.

Your choice.

We'll quite. I'm not sure why you have such a view on what others do in their own homes.

The immune system argument pretty much admits it's not clean, hence why it boosts your immune system (bacteria).

Perfectly clean isn't actually a desirable state, which is where the immune system argument comes in. When I say my house is perfectly clean, I mean for all reasonable purposes of living. It's not sterile or ever should be.

Would you be ok with wearing shoes on your couch, since it's perfectly clean

Its just not something I tend to do.
But floors are different to furnishings and the argument against it would be as much about proximity to others sitting down rather anything else.

Sorry for double post

So the babies can play with as much dirt as they like outside but the minuscule amounts on peoples shoes that may transfer and the crawling baby may choose to lick that exact spot is an issue?

We are too clean as a society and that is not good for immune systems. People have become so precious over germs and dirt. Maybe it’s down to Covid.

It’s just not polite to ask people to remove their shoes and hence it is a class issue. Guests comfort come over your precious floors.

Doesn’t mean I walk around in my house all day in shoes. I like to walk around barefoot. But I’ll walk around the garden then walk in my house. Not an issue.

Where you live is going to make a difference, if you live somewhere with nice pavements everywhere you're not going to be bringing in visible dirt and suchlike (putting aside bacteria for the moment) but for instance I live somewhere with sandy/stony/gravelly roads and no pavements in the immediate area so if I walk inside with my shoes on I'll be bringing in the little bits of gravel that get stuck in the tread of the shoe, and eventually will come off on the floor, and who wants to be sweeping up bits of gravel every time you come in? (and then of course there's the issue of winter and snow - the floors would get soaked every time with snow dropping off boots)

It’s just not polite to ask people to remove their shoes and hence it is a class issue.

In my country it would be considered not polite to wear your shoes into someone's house, so that would be the low class thing to do.

I hate this. I find it so rude.

As a family we are always barefoot in our home (don’t wear socks or slippers either) but I never ask guests to remove their shoes, ever. We have tiled floors throughout downstairs. We have two big dogs. My feet are generally clean, so it can’t be that dirty! That said, I tend to think that the sort of grub that dogs and shoes bring in is good for the immune system (obviously not including actual dog shit in this) and no shoes is about comfort, rather than cleanliness - some people are more comfortable with their shoes on. As an aside, some people have disgusting feet and I’d rather they kept them to themselves!

Yea @Natsku in my earlier post I said that doesn’t apply to other countries and cultures.

But people from other countries and cultures live in the UK too, and their cultural influences spread, or Brits spent time living abroad and pick up new habits like shoes off inside and bring them back with them so it can't really be considered a class thing any more, too many other possible factors.

So the babies can play with as much dirt as they like outside but the minuscule amounts on peoples shoes that may transfer and the crawling baby may choose to lick that exact spot is an issue?

Because.... it's outside. Baby comes in and gets washed. I don't want it on my floor, anymore than I want dirt on my couch. It's hardly a mystery, if we're being honest. Same reason we play with sand at the beach but I don't want it in my rug.

If you keep a clean floor it is fine. If you have dirt and pet hair all over your floor making people take off shoes is awful behaviour.

We don’t live in your country. We live in a country where it was once unheard of to ask people to remove their shoes. And where many people consider it rude.

Again, people from other countries live in Britain too, and cultural influences spread and intermingle, Brits spend time living abroad and pick up things like shoes off in the house, and bring that back to Britain.

Likewise, we're not in your house we're in mine. Where I consider it rude. That's all it boils down to. I'd wear shoes if I was asked to, equally you should remove if asked to, and not whinge about it.

Hmm I always offer to take my shoes off anyway so I wouldn’t offend anyone from a different culture that is shoes off.

And yes we have picked up habits from other cultures. But that doesn’t change the fact that in British society it is seen as impolite to ask people to take their shoes off and this stems from
the upper middle classes.

Just as it’s impolite to not take your shoes off in Japan.

Some people over here may not know or understand the etiquette that’s all.

The bottom line is your guests comfort is more important than your floors! You are not being a good host if you ask someone to take their shoes off and this makes them uncomfortable.

And they can do as they like but they can’t expect everyone else to follow their lead. By your logic it would be fine for people from this country to refuse to remove their shoes when they visit your country. But that would be rude, wouldn’t it? When in Rome works both ways.

Respect and good manners goes both ways. Just because someone is a guest does not mean good manners should go out of the window.

@Natsku. This thread’s moving fast!

For the first time in about 25 years I have a part carpeted house ( upstairs only, I hate floors you can’t wash daily) Friend came over the other day & I wanted to show her some shelves I’d just put up in the spare bedroom. She said how wet her sandals were as she’d just washed her car —- and then started to walk up the carpeted stairs in them. Was not happy when I asked her to leave them in the tiled hallway.

Not unreasonable at all. Especially if you don’t wear shoes in your house. Why should someone else be entitled to wear their shoes in your shoe-free home? They don’t have to live there and clean it! And all the people saying it’s a class thing are incredibly insulting to the many cultures around this world who consider it very rude to wear shoes inside someone’s home.