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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Alcohol in blood when pregnant - social services

43 replies

recoveringyoungalco · 26/07/2022 14:38

I posted on here before about my regret about admitting my MH/ alcohol issues www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4548803-should-i-have-admitted-i-had-mh-alcoholism-issues

I had my baby a few days ago. When I was in hospital in labour MH midwife made contact with me for the 1st time. She said all of my referrals had me listed as low risk/ priority which I agree with. There are a lot of drug issues in the area, she told me they at any time have pregnant drug addicts in. Anyway we had a very good open/ honest discussion about my MH issues and my alcoholism. She said so everyone is on the same page would I do a blood + urine test. I agreed.

It came back that there was alcohol in my blood!!!!! A tiny trace amount, she said it was 2, to be over the limit it would be 90. But I DID NOT DRINK ALCOHOL. I know alcoholics lie so I appreciate that is hard for her to believe. When she came back with the results she said 'I guess you know what I need to talk to you' I told her no, because I really had no clue, I hadn't thought any further on the blood test because I had no reason to think it would be zero.

She said she was surprised by it too after our talk, but that the test doesn't lie. I was very very upset by it all. I got her to re do the blood test and it was clear but she said enough time had lapsed for it to be clear. I am a believer in science but something has to have gone wrong here it really has because I did not drink alcohol.

She said that she won't do anything this time but that she is taking a huge risk in trusting me if anything goes wrong. That she should report me to social services. She said she would catch up with me before I left the hospital but she didn't.

I really wish I had kept my mouth shut I am so worried they are going to take my baby away. I got no additional support and only got this at the end which I don't need or really feel I deserve

Will they take my baby away??. I did not drink alcohol but I know it doesn't look good science doesn't tend to lie, people on the other hand do. Is it possible the test was wrong? Contaminated? I forgot to ask what my urine showed.

OP posts:

Iwantsunshine · 26/07/2022 19:54

Also to say to you ‘she won’t do anything this time…’ she has a duty of care to protect your child , she can’t just decide to let you off when it suits and then next time fulfil that duty of care - seems odd to me. all seems a bit unprofessional.

Usually the midwives/nurses would have referred you to a social work (before the baby was born) if they had any real concerns about your parenting etc before baby arrived, you would have been involved in meetings as well.

Sounds like you have nothing to worry about and if you’re doing your best to stay sober then that’s amazing and they should have no reason to remove your baby provided you remain honest and upfront with them, even if they did hve concerns they would try and work with you to resolve the issues before jumping into removing your baby - as someone above said the threshold for removing children is very high.

Jellycatspyjamas · 26/07/2022 19:59

If they had any concerns about your baby there would have been a prebirth assessment and you would have been involved. There’s no way social work would recommend removing a child for such a very low alcohol level, they hardly have space for the children they know to be at risk much less those who there are no/low concern about.

Oblomov22 · 26/07/2022 20:01

This is worrying because it's scaremongering. Agree with Cinnabomb, not that any of us are recommending it, but no one can stop you having a drink. Keep calm. Ring your GP and talk to her. If SS do come make sure you are NOT alone: your Dh, mum, anyone, a witness. Just to support you and make sure nothing untoward is said.

Dinoteeth · 26/07/2022 20:24

Op Some people make alcohol in their bodies. I don't know the science behind it if it relates to types of food people eat or what but that's why they can't make the Drink drive limit 0, anti alcohol SNP would if they could.

But it sounds like you had someone on a power trip.

SteelCicada · 26/07/2022 20:28

2 is a tiny amount, and what your MW is saying is crazy. She won't refer you 'this time'? Well it shouldn't be a matter for her discretion - either the situation requires a referral or it doesn't. I think this is very weird, almost like she's trying to intimidate you quietly. I think you should complain about this. Not to her.

PrinnyPree · 26/07/2022 20:37

I jut wanted to say well done on staying sober OP and congratulations on the birth of your baby. You have done so well. xxx

If it's any consolation when my DP (now DH) and I first tried to properly quit smoking 15 years ago on the NHS (when we were students) we had to do breath tests every week to prove we hadn't smoked to get given patches. Every week the CO breathalyser gave a small reading of around 10ppm even though we hadn't smoked a thing and the chemist used to give us shit every week about our results (which luckily were just under the threshhold for the cessation scheme) and threatened to not give us out prescribed patches if the numbers didn't go down, anyway after a month they got the thing recalibrated and we were blowing zeros and ones from that point on so this stuff does happen.

As others have said the threshhold for SS involvement is very high, you sound like you have worked incredibly hard and don't think you need to worry. x

SpaceFarce · 26/07/2022 20:43

Your midwife was on a power trip. I say this with real confidence - they are not going to take your baby away for this.

Original poster

recoveringyoungalco · 26/07/2022 22:51

I've been cluster feeding all afternoon so only seeing these now. And hopefully we are done for a small bit I need a nap!

Yes some of what happened doesn't really add up now. Surely if they have a duty to report it should not be at her discretion.

I don't think it's possible to 'clear' my name of it being there even if it is an error the blood lab would never admit that. I won't take it further I'd be worried about drawing unnecessary attention to myself. I have never had any dealing with ss so I wasn't really sure and the thought of them being involved obviously terrified me and I got very worried. Not exactly what I needed during labour.

I had good reasons before to stay sober, now I have the best one in the world.

OP posts:

Lordylord1 · 27/07/2022 07:39

coukd It be mouthwash or something?
from your post I’m more worried about her saying she should report you to social services but won’t. It’s either a safeguarding issue or it’s not.
this would not make it through the front door my love! It’s frowned upon but it’s not a crime to have one or 2 a week during pregnancy that 2 is likely way below what that woold
xome out of! To me that’s negligible.
i doubt this would even warrant a phone call from children services but if it did it would be to offer you help. So please stop worrying as long as you are taking care of your baby not putting tjem
in danger and making safe decisions your fine.
please stop worrying about this and enjoy your first few months. That lady was so wrong to put things how she did. She’s not doing you a favour by not reporting you (which is completely against safeguarding policy) it just doesn’t warrant a safeguarding referral.
you sound like you have done really well overcoming alcohol
misuse and experiencing mental health difficulties. Which is not uncommon Xx

Original poster

recoveringyoungalco · 29/07/2022 16:52

@Lordylord1 I did use alcohol free mouthwash for a while but it is not a 'trigger' for me so switched back to what ever is on offer when I need it.

From reading these messages I am starting to think she may have done it to frighten me, DP thought this at the time - that she was pressing me to admit something, which I didn't because there was nothing to admit. She also made a huge deal that I am at a much higher risk of PND and that she wanted get me prescribed something for at least 8 weeks in case. As I said I didn't even see her again! I haven't been contacted by her since getting home either. I also thankfully do not feel at risk of PND

OP posts:

Frequency · 29/07/2022 17:06

I know full blown alcoholics who still have sole care of their children. SS are aware and were previously monitoring the situation. The midwife is talking out of her arse. SS would laugh at her if she referred you for having .2 blood alcohol. It's most likely from mouthwash or contanimation from the acohol wipe.

NotMyselfWithoutCoffee · 29/07/2022 17:26

.2 is nothing you could get that from drinking orange juice.
I agree with the others, she is just on some weird power trip.

Tartanshawl · 29/07/2022 17:38

Alcohol is in so many things i.e hand soap, hand sanitizer, shower gel and deodorant! we absorb everything through our pores, that's likely to be what's caused the confusion here....Make sure you say this to this social worker.

willstarttomorrow · 29/07/2022 17:55

As a CP social worker, please do not worry. If your account is true, social care would assess and most likely close, offering any support if needed. What worries me is the midwife- if she is concerned as a professional she has a duty of care to refer to the safeguarding team- she does not have the remit or necessary skills to assess ongoing risk. Using this to 'scare you' is unprofessional and totally goes against best practice. I would suggest speaking to her manager about it- although I appreciate you probably do not want the hassle with a new baby. It may however be beneficial for your own piece of mind going forward. These things have a tendency linger and drag people down (understandably) so it is often important to address them.

Unfortunately, whilst most health care professionals I work with are amazing, there have been a significant few who are judgemental around child protection, parents who do not meet 'their ideal' and are just lack empathy and any skill in this area. I was a nurse myself- so I have respect for the profession, but a few are very 'black and white' and totally unable to understand balancing risk, family circumstances and often how their approach has added to parent's anxiety and makes things worse. Again, most are great- particularly midwifes/health visitors/school nurses who work in difficult areas or specialise. Your midwife sound unhelpful and actually harmful in regards to your mental health and ongoing support.

DiscoBadgers · 29/07/2022 18:18

Do you drink a lot of orange juice?

Prometheus · 29/07/2022 18:36

The body produces small amounts of alcohol naturally - that’s why we can never have a drink drive limit of 0 as it is produced naturally as part of normal bodily functions. As a healthcare professional should should know this.

dworky · 29/07/2022 19:36

Ask for another test.

scarletisjustred · 29/07/2022 19:41

I would have thought that if you wipe your skin with alcohol and then you stick a needle in of course it's going to be contaminated. I would complain about this. She had no right to behave like this and carry on as if you were downing pints of gin.

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