Lending the car out !!

[Moonchair1]

me and other half are 50/50 everything all one pot etc
we have a car each, when I got new I gave him my old one for work
(not old old and still very nice looking on the road)
last month his work mate asked to lend it to go fishing with lads I made a song and dance and said no il call the police to say it’s been stolen etc if he does.. so he didn’t but said I embarrassed him saying no.. I said in future it’s a no to things like that
anyway they just asked again to lend the car to go fishing I kicked off again and said no
AIBU ? please help me and other half are not agreeing on this

Point out this friend could hire a car to go fishing.

If they insure it and fuel it, and it’s not to go to the moon in, I can’t see the problem.

either it’s his car or you own everything

Is it his car or not?

You say that you gave him your old car, but you haven't transferred to ownership documents to him & are insisting that you can veto his plans for what is described as "his car.

What ownership documents?

It's not his car, you have 2 cars and lend him one. If that's the case yanbu, however if it's his car, he can lend it to whoever he wants

Not according to the OP, she states she gave it to him, that’s not lending.

Not wanting him to lend the car to his friend - fine.

Kicking off, song and dance, threatening to call the police - not fine. Grow up and have an adult conversation instead of throwing a tantrum.

When I started driving, DH transferred ownership of his to me on the logbook. That meant that any incidents were traced to me not him. (There weren't any!)

You need to check the level of insurance. 3rd party is legal cover but won't cover damage to the vehicle. It's also not default on a fully comp policy anymore as people often abused it.

I have "lent" my car before. I was temporarily unable to drive. My very local friend was temporarily without a car. It was mutually beneficial to add her to my insurance for a month. She kept my car going through a hard winter, gave me lifts and could go about her business.

For a random trip like the fishing, I'd be pointing out car hire.

It's not as simple as just insuring it. If any claim is made on the policy, it will massively hike up the following year's premium.

Oh, and what is it with all the people who switch the terms lend/borrow?
I lend something to you; you borrow it from me.

When I started driving, DH transferred ownership of his to me on the logbook.

The logbook has nothing to do with ownership though.

No way.
If it’s for fishing it will be driven somewhere off road at some point, or parked in a lay by or similar
The car will stink (my grandad was a fisherman…)
Other people NEVER look after your stuff like you would yourself. Bmw costs a bomb to service and maintain.

It's not as simple as just insuring it. If any claim is made on the policy, it will massively hike up the following year's premium.

Yes it is. A temp insurance policy will have no effect on the owner’s policy.

You are controlling and unreasonable in your attitude towards a joke of a 50/50 partnership. It is his car.

He is an idiot for considering lending a car out to a pal. You are correct to say no but for all the wrong reasons.

Anyhow, sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. Either he will just ignore you and be stupid enough to lend it to a pal without even telling you or you will undermine him to the point he just sacks you off.

No way would I loan a car like that for a fishing trip.
It will end up filthy. A group of lads are usually pretty filthy. The car would come back stinking like sweat, BO, booze, dead fish and never be able to get the smell out of the seats, especially if they are leather.

The friend should hire a truck or buy an old beat up one for fishing.

Sorry I don't think its your call. His car, his decision. I think you're acting very immature with threatening to report it stolen etc. Controlling much?

OMG how controlling are you!

I think you’re acting like a child.
You gave him the car so it’s his and he should be able to lend it to his friends.
They need to be insured on it and therefore if something happens it’s their responsibility. Sounds like you still feel the car is yours so not everything is 50/50 like you said!

That's monumentally silly.

If they have an accident while driving the car, it's your insurance policy that would be impacted, your no claims bonus/discount and your vehicle that could be off the road until it's repaired.
They should hire a car for the weekend/week while they are going fishing and take out whatever insurance policy would come with that.

I'm actually thinking that there would be a smell in the car when you'd likely get it back. I can't imagine what that would be like after fishing.

@alnawire I'd add my dsis but men who can't afford to rent a car, no way. Heaven only knows how they'd drive it, treat it, what happens if they have a accident driving while under the influence of drugs or alcohol.

I'm staggered at the no of people who think it's ok tbh @Moonchair1 An employee took an old work van home one weekend and wrote it and another vehicle off. The insurance company refused any claim and advised us to say - which was true - that he wasn't insured as he wasn't working and it was a weekend He was taken to court but as he was from Aus he simply left the UK.

I can't get past everything is 50/ 50 but both cars are mine 🤷‍♀️

I understand the big song and dance. We have 2 cars. Dh car getting fixed last week, I'm wfh from home so he took mine. My bf offered to lend me her car for a few days as I had an unexpected appt. I am insured to drive any car so I said yes please!
I don't see what the issue is? You sound very controlling. I've also lent my car to my parents and my sister (making sure they were insured to drive someone else's car). I'm my circle that's what people do for each other.

I meant don't understand **

Why does the friend keepg asking him to borrow car for fishing???

I suspect none of you were in the car for a couple of days unbathed, in a muddy/dirty place with smelly fishing gear, eskis of beer, containers of stinky bait either.

His friend fishes everyday but this trip is not down the road at local river it’s the other side of the country
he has sorted someone else’s car out now and knows not to ask again
i wouldn’t dream of asking to take someones car lol so don’t think it’s fair to be asked either
move let my mum and dad use my car when theirs were broke but that’s as far as it goes
also the work mates can be dicks (with my partner ) with the story’s he tells me soooooooo