To find it funny when DH is furious?

[BlameTheDog]

to find it funny when DH is furious?

I don’t know what it is, but the crosser he gets the more it makes me laugh.
Take yesterday: DH and I went to the garden centre and DD2 (not a child - home from uni) stayed at home and was given strict instructions to supervise the unruly vandal that is our 18 month old (not) working cocker spaniel, in particular to make sure he didn’t destroy the garden.

When we got home I went up the garden (long and narrow) to pick some lettuce and carrots. I immediately saw a big hole, really big, in the middle of the lawn. I quietly returned to the kitchen and busied myself scraping the carrots. I watched through the window as DH went up the garden and swerved right as he saw the hole. I called DD and said “DD unruly dog has dug a huge hole and Dad has just seen it, he’s going to be furious”. She came and peered out of the window before rushing upstairs to her bedroom.

DH stormed in cursing the dog and DD, demanded she come downstairs to inspect the damage.
She came down, swearing she had been watching the dog, I carried on scraping carrots, bent double over the sink, my shoulders shaking, so he went back up the garden to have a rant at the neighbour who is a sympathetic sort. DD and I collapsed laughing, we were crying with laughter, I don’t know why I find it so funny when he’s angry but I do, and so does DD.

So if you went out, and asked another adult in the house to look after something, they didn't and damage was caused you'd just laugh?

If this is real, I would find being treated like that by my husband really hurtful.

How incredibly pathetic and unpleasant. I hope he LTB.

You are horrible. Tbh I think that's borderline abusive to laugh at someone when upset. Especially involving your DD. What a great example you've set.

Actually now you come to mention it, my dad was abusive (occasionally) to my mum so maybe my reaction is a diffusion of tension. I’d never thought of that.

Meanwhile, if I laugh when DP is getting wound up, (only occasionally I might add) he invariably sees it as funny too when he’s got over whatever it was. It doesn’t create any problems between us.

Seriously, you're happy to admit that your 19 yo adult "child" cannot even be trusted to supervise a little dog, totally ignores your requests and you both think its hilarious when your husband gets angry, you sound really silly.

I do this occasionally if someone gets very angry. Luckily we are not an aggressive family so it doesn’t happen at home but I remember a customer once kicking off at me, really screaming and going crazy, and I was just giggling. I think it’s horrific nerves.

However, in op’s case it kind of sounds like she just finds it funny because he’s upset. Which is really weird. Although I do find it a bit odd that your daughter ran upstairs to hide in her room and you ‘quietly busied yourself peeling carrots.’ Does he get ‘furious’ often?

Exactly, can you imagine the vitriol and LTB if op came on saying she was really upset after the house being damaged due to the DS and her DH and adult male son were doubled over in laughter at her being upset!

The next time you're very upset, perhaps he'll laugh at you and get your child to join in. I'm sure you'll love it.

Looking back I used to sometimes feel a perverse glee when ex husband got wound up, I think because I had zero respect for him, his behaviour was appalling, and the relationship was in shreds and we very soon divorced. Unless you're in a similar situation, then not great. Even less great that your dd is in on the routine.

Well a pup digging a hole in the garden is to be expected. Our ddog was the same and dh used to rant and yes the more he ranted the more me and dd laughed. It’s a ridiculous thing to rant about, it’s not like a ruined carpet.
Ddog fell in the pool once and dh was so busy ranting that he ignored me shouting to shut the patio door, so of course ddog ran into the house and shook water everywhere. And I laughed because it was funny.

Give over, it’s a hole in a lawn!

If the puppy had destroyed a large part of the living room flooring or cheeed it's way through the sofa or destroyed a load of OPs expensive shoes or something because her daughter decided not to watch the puppy as asked, wonder how the op would take her anger being laughed at by her dh and dd.

It's the type of thing you laugh at in the future further down the line after fixing the damage and at the situation rather than the persons feelings. My friend was looking after my puppy for me when I was in hospital and she left it outside and she dug up a large patch in friends garden that her husband has spend years getting into great condition, he was angry and nobody laughed at him. I felt terrible, friend felt terrible, he laughs about it now and still looked after my puppy if I needed hospital and he loved my dog as much as his own dog, but laughing at his upset over his immaculate lawn being danger would have been a shitty thing to do.

There's a popular tik tok lass whose was gifted a puppy by his children knowing full well the mother wasn't happy and most of the content is around the mums very reasonable reaction of being cross and angry at her clothes being destroyed, or her furniture chewed, her garden plants dug up and having to clean piss and shit up all while the husband and adult daughter laughs at his wife's upset.

It's a hole in the lawn, but shitty and twatty behaviour from op and adult daughter.

It could be something of a defence mechanism... what is his normal demeanour and personality like? Does he often get angry or overreact?

I think my mum might do this a little, thinking about it. Possibly I think relating to family dynamics- him being the breadwinner and with control over her in the traditional sort of sense. It's a nervous thing maybe. Or in the sense of being made to feel worthless/ unimportant, so his loss of control is almost funny?? I don't know, but our reactions to things are complicated and there is often a bigger picture.

This. I was about to post something similar about my ex. He would get all bent out of shape over something and I would have to force myself not to laugh. And when I think about it it’s because he was an absolute prick and I’d lost all respect for him.

however in the OPs case I find this weird and unnerving.

I think the anti vax people were eighth that there was something else in it.

Cleary it has had a huge impact on sense of humour. Fucking sour as anything the lot of you.

There are so many juvenile posts on mumsnet this weekend, must be the school holidays. 🤔

Or bored kids sitting in the queues at Dover

OH goes up like a roman rocket at the most minor things. The rest of the immediate family roll their eyes, visitors look on in shock.

He does, however, adore dogs and would just fill the hole in again

How's it overreacting, dd was asked to make sure dog didn't destroy the garden, dog did destroy garden and DH got annoyed. Rather than apologise for not following basic instructions op and dd just pissed themselves laughing. I hope the puppy chews up their shoes and shits on their clothes. Maybe then dh will get a good laugh at their expense

It does sound funny. No point all getting furious about it, so I’m with OP.

Yeah, you're kind of a wanker.

Typical AIBU reply’s OP.
All to be taken with a healthy pinch of salt.
Toddler tantrums are hilarious.

I mean, a grown man getting so angry over a hole in the garden is a bit silly...and a bit funny. As he charged off to rant about it to a neighbour then I can only imagine that it added to the humour.