My BF ‘forgot’ to see me

[letskeepitlight]

I've been with my BF for 4.5 years.
We mostly get on great and he's a lovely person.
He's busy with his kids for as he has them first week of summer hols. He spends a lot of time transporting them to and from where I live for various activities.
We arranged for him to call in for coffee after he dropped off his son near me.
He forgot and drove straight home.
He is sorry, he didn't mean it, and I know he didn't. He was absent-minded.
I'm making a bit of a deal of this because I'm quite hurt that my BF actually forgot to see me.
He's apologised, sent me flowers and a card and messaged me saying he's sorry.
But my BF 'forgot' to see me.
Am I reading too much into this?

Yes, it's the school hold, cut him some slack. In the nicest way.

Human error with a nice apology. Who has never gone on autopilot before?
Relax.

He is human and humans sometimes forget stuff. He is busy with his DC and your arrangement to have coffee slipped his mind. He has apologised so you need to let it go.

He sent you flowers and card for that bit much.

change of routine has fried his brain. What a nice apology.

I think his reaction to send flowers and a card was a bit ott to be honest! He just went home on autopilot. It happens, I do it frequently.
How far away from you does he live?

Get over yourself!

YABVU

An apology, flowers and a card because he forgot to drop by for a coffee?

Thats way over the top which is the same as your reaction

I wouldn't like to be forgotten either, but parents espeically can become preoccupied, and his apology is a great one.

Yes, cut him some slack this time, but if it happens again, there's a pattern starting.

God, the amount of times I've just driven home on autopilot and forgot to do something I meant to do, even when I remembered it 5 minutes earlier! When your routine is broken up, you forget things, especially if you're feeling tired/burnt out/harrassed/busy/a million other things.

His reaction is way OTT, which suggests to me that your reaction was really big, and/or that you've taken massive offence to his actions previously. If that happened to me I honestly think I'd laugh and go 'you bloody idiot!' in a non-pissed off kind of way, unless there's some massive backstory or drip feed that we don't know about.

I agree that his ott apology was probably to try to pre-empt an ott reaction from the op. Do you have form for taking offence easily, op?

I once forgot to pick my child up from holiday club. Drove home from work on autopilot. You're being very OTT.

Wow. Doesn't take much together on your bad side!

He has apologised, unnecessarily sent you flowers, and you're still holding a grudge.

Get over yourself. Or is this a way of showing you're jealous of him spending time with his kids?

Do you suspect he's cooling on you OP? Or he was doing something else that he hasn't told you about?

Unless your worried there is something else going on, then I think you have to accept his apology and move on. His flowers and card indicate that you made it very clear that he'd messed up in a huge way. Which I think is an over reaction. But it's up to you how you play things now. But if you believe that he simply forgot, you have to let this go now.

YABU when I was heavily pregnant my dad was supposed to pick me up at my house and take me to a hospital appointment, he drove straight past my road and had to turn round to come back for me. I was stood outside waiting for him for 10 minutes. I myself have also forgotten to go to their house when I was supposed to and driven straight home many times. Memory slips happen especially when tired or when you have many ither things to think of. You are being very ott.

OP, chill!

YABU. I forgot to meet my Gran once and I loved that woman dearly

Poor woman had got the tram in to the city centre to meet me after work and I just went on auto pilot and drove home after work ! (had to do a massive blag on the phone to her and say I got stuck at work)

Apologies I can understand but the flowers and card? Waaaaay too much! How much of a deal did you make it out to be? When did you last see him, and when will you see him again?

I’m guessing the OTT reaction came first…

And still OP is whining ‘But he forgotttttt!!!’ 🙄

The things I've done on auto pilot! Drive home to my old house instead of new one when I had recently moved. "Xx" to end a text to a tradesperson. Say the wrong phrase at the wrong time at work, eg, customer approaches me "Thank you, have a nice day!".

That's what I thought.

Exactly what do you want - grovelling for weeks? YABVU.

Gosh, it's the school holidays and he's apologised. The fact he's also got you a card and flowers SCREAMS red flag. Does he always have to do a lot of grovelling to you OP when he makes a mistake?

Huge overreaction. I can't believe he felt he had to buy you flowers either!

Jaysus it must be great to be perfect op because your reaction is way over the top. Ffs give the man a break.