Gay friend said he loved me.

[AreWeNearlyThereYet84]

My (male) gay friend and I have been friends for quite some time and see each other lots. We also speak to each other daily.

We were recently talking by text message and he told me he loved me. This came as a huge surprise as he definitely never talks about his feelings and he's not even a touchy-feely person either. It was in context but I didn't really know what to say so after an hour I said to him that I bet he tells everyone he loves them and then we both got busy with work and that was that.

Since then, we were texting again about something and I joked that he loved me now and he replied 'that's true'.

My gay friend doesn't love me romantically does he?

I was also very ill recently and he said he'd come and look after me if I needed him to. Something very out of character for him to say.

He has said to me a few times that he falls in love easily, but I have always presumed with men!

this is just a normal close friendship, surely???

Oh @RubyWho. I was hoping he'd fallen for my charms!

Don't you love any of your friends?

It sounds like he considers you an important person in his life and he cares about you, that's very sweet. I wouldn't assume he means romantic love. If he was interested in a romantic way I'd expect he'd ask you on a date or make some gesture that invites a shift in your behaviour with each other and how you spend time together, rather than an 'I love you' thrown into your daily banter.

I tell many friends I love them, I'm not saying I'm in love with them. If your friend is gay (not bi) he obviously hasnt changed his sexuality for you.

There's more than one kind of love...

Assuming he's actually gay which we should do, then the obvious answer is no it would seem he's not romantically in love with you but platonically

I tell platonic friends that I love them all the time. Doesn't mean I'm attracted to them or that I want a relationship.
And it would honestly never cross my mind that I'd somehow converted a gay friend if he told me, in context, that he loved me.

I tell my friends I love them all the time! I hope they don't think I'm in love with them. Though to be fair they also say it to me so I could be unknowingly in a lot of romantic relationships.

It's platonic love & don't knock it, it can last a lot longer than romantic love. My GBF has loved me openly for over 40 years & I love him like the closest brother, his BF of 30 years loves me now too & we all love both of them enough that they are DDs godparents. Apart from family, he is the single most reliable long term love in my life

Sounds platonic to me. So yes loves you but not in the way you are thinking

Why would you want a gay man to be in love with you?

If he’s gay that it’s extremely unlikely he loves you in any kind of romantic sense, I’m sure he just loves you as a friend. It would also be unusual for someone to just declare romantic love for a friend with no conversation about or hint of attraction before hand.

Well it would help if you clarified whether you were male or female in your OP . The "My (male) gay friend .." doesn't tell us if he is male or you are male?

He may love you romantically
He may love you as a close friend
Both are very possible

You'll only know if you talk to him and listen

I'm confused about what your AIBU is though? AYBU ... about what?

I'm female.

Is your male friend a doctor by any chance? Like the gay married (man to a man) that sexually assaulted me…

Love my friends, tell them I love them but it’s not romantic

do you want it to be romantic?

I love 2 of my male friends (I am a straight female), they are very dear to me but I don’t want to marry them. I just love them and care a lot about them.

Sorry to hear you were assaulted @Blue4YOU , but no he's not a doctor. There are lots of gay men in the UK, not just my friend, but I am sorry for your experience.

I told a gay male friend I loved him. He smiled and said he loved me too. He's still gay, and I'm still in love with DH.

There are lots of ways to love. Be happy you have a wonderful friendship.

@safetylastday Yes, I do, I suppose. He's not my usual type, but he's grown on me massively in a romantic way.

@safetylastday I also know nothing will ever happen! He's 100% into men!

I think he's saying it because as he is gay, there could be no question that you would misinterpret what he is saying.

@AreWeNearlyThereYet84 i was being a little tongue in cheek at my expense- do you really think there are more than two gay men in the UK 🙄

Love isn't only based on romantic or sexual attractions OP!

You love (usually) siblings, parents, extended family, friends as well.