AIBU to feel so emotional about my child leaving primary school?

[SallyWD]

My DD is leaving her wonderful primary school tomorrow and I'm really taken aback by how emotional I feel about this. I almost feel like I'm going through a grieving process. It's such a lovely school - honestly all the children in her class and all the parents are just great. Everyone gets on so well and in a way it feels like one big family. These children have all been together since they were 4 years old and are now going their separate ways. I feel so sad! And it's ridiculous because my daughter is going to a really good secondary school. I know she's more than ready for it and I'm sure she will thrive but still it just seems like the end of an era and kind of heart breaking. I think I feel sad for a couple of reasons - firstly it's time passing too quickly, her growing up too fast. It only seems like yesterday that I took her for her first day in reception. I can still remember what I said to her that morning and the look on her face as I walked away. Secondly I've seen these parents nearly every day for 7 years and I'll miss them! Yes there are some I will still see as we're friends but realistically there are many I won't see again. For most of us it was our first child in the class so it feels like we've all been through a journey together. Thirdly I'm just sad that she's leaving this school where she has so many close friends and has ben so happy (even though I feel positive and excited about the next school).

So I just wondered - do other people feel the same way as me? Or am I being a ridiculous, sentimental old fool?

My son left primary in 2003 and I cried like mad.

DD left primary last year (18 years later), and I was emotional leading up to it, saw all the other parents crying, but didn't cry myself. My dad was ill though, so after dropping DD off at home with DH, I went straight round to see him...he died literally as I got there, so I never managed to shed a tear for DD leaving primary.

If DD2 had lived, she would be leaving primary next summer - 20 years after my eldest did.

I feel really strange in that I no longer feel sentimental about anything. I didn't cry when dad died, even though I did when my brother died the year before...I think I've become devoid of emotion.

@buggeringbuggery I'm so sorry for what you been through. I'm not surprised you now feel numb.

I know this thread is a few years old. But I came here wondering if others felt the same way. Glad to see I’m not alone. My wonderful little boy left primary today, and we’re just both heartbroken. My son is grieving the familiarity and safety of his tiny village school ( 34pupils in total) and me his early years. But, it’s time to move on. I felt comforted by your comments. Thanks 💜

Enjoy the summer with your child it’s literally the last summer of childhood. Looked at pics of Dd summer she left year 6 a little fresh faced girl leaping into lakes. The following year she was a young teen and in a very different phase.

This

100% this.
Since starting secondary school dd has changed a lot.
Last year she was a year 6 leaver and was still very happy to spend time with us as a family.
Fast forward a year and it's all about independence and friends now.
We're lucky if she will come with us to the park!

I still remember weeping embarrassingly when they sang "One more step along the road I go".....

It's a real "end of a era" feeling, isn't it? I started this thread two years ago and remember the feelings so well. I was very tearful for weeks around the time she left! My daughter's now in year 8 of secondary school and absolutely thriving.
I'm actually going through it again with my son who'll soon leave primary school. I feel a bit better about it this time, mostly because I'm focusing on him starting the new school. However, I know I'll be in tears when he walks out of his lovely primary school for the last time. It was such a wonderful school with so many happy memories for my children.

They sang that at my dc nursery graduation complete with hat and gowns 😭

My third child has one year left of primary. It has been a wonderful primary school and as a family we have been very involved with it over the years. I will be very sad saying goodbye to the school but not for my child leaving they are ready for the next stage, see their older siblings thriving in secondary and just want to get one with it. No idea how I will get her through another year of primary. I am in Ireland so they do 8 years in primary and start secondary at 12/13

I felt more emotional about DS leaving primary than I did him starting it to be honest!

Mine has just finished year 11 so another end of an era. Good luck to all of you with DCs starting secondary this year, it can be a challenging time but so rewarding seeing them grow and become more independent.

My DS is leaving yr6 and I am in tears reading this. It feels like a massive security blanket is bring pulled away from my DS and me! The familiarity and warmth of primary school is lovely.

Mu DS has ASD and I suppose I am very lucky that has been our experience.

It is great to hear the ops daughter is thriving two years later.

Youngest DC also left primary in 2020. No leavers celebration, no saying goodbye, they just didn't meet up again as a class from March 2020. They went into school one Friday and that was it - some class mates he never saw again.

The School was appalling during covid. We Had no work from the school and the only advice given was to encourage reading! It was a long six months before he was able to start his Secondary school and be then we were all pretty disappointed and disengaged by the way it felt the class had been ignored for the last 5 months of their primary education. So sadly we didnt have quite the same emotional end of primary...it felt a relief TBH that they were moving onto a more organised and supportive school.

Lord - exactly the same experience. Feel a little sad about that stage of Dd2s life. First world problem I know.

Remember them being sent home on 23 March and she twigged straight away that that was it for year 6. Cried and then came to terms with it. I was sad though.

A friend recently took her sensible non dramatic Dd to her little brothers yearc6 leavers assembly. The girl ended up in floods of tears as it fully hit how crap it had been for year of 2020.

DD left primary school at the height of lockdown. So no residential, no leaving assembly, no prom. It was sad for all the wrong reasons.

Secondary school is a whole different ball game. DD has hated every minute of it and I don't blame her. Teenagers are just vile! Her experience has been horrendous. There will be tears of joy when it's over!

Enjoy your last summer with a rosy faced innocent child.

If it helps, my 77 year old mum is still friends with and regularly sees parents of my primary school friends. Who I've long since lost touch with. So that bit can continue for ages!

Your child is embarking on her next stage, it's ok to be sad, but also to look forward.

My youngest DS leaves primary this week and I'm feeling emotional about it.
We love our school and the community that goes with it. As someone else said, it's like a security blanket being taken away.
We've been involved with the school for 9 years (my older DS finished there two years ago). So it feels like a big change, particularly as parents aren't really involved with secondary school .

For me I think it's cos I never do well with change and it's the start of him transitioning to becoming more independent - I know it's great for him, I'm just finding that hard.

Luckily he's excited to move on and he's ready to. But as parents we're allowed to feel sad about that too.

Oh i just know i'm going to be a wreck when my daughter leaves her primary, we love it. I'm sad she's finishing Y3, growing up so fast.

I started this thread two years ago and glad to see it's been revived as I'm going through it again with my son this week! I know exactly how you feel. I also don't cope well with change or endings, the finality of it all - especially when it involves other people.
Let yourself feel emotional. It's natural to feel sad about this end of an era.
I hope your son settles in well at secondary school and has many happy years there.

I'm not a massively emotional sort but I cried when my last DC left primary school as it has been such a big part of our lives for 10 years and I had met so many lovely people. Secondary school is so different as it's generally not a community with parents involved anymore. Plus once they start secondary they start to change so much.

My kids have now left secondary school too and I wasn't sad when they left at all! Primary school is such a lovely thing.

My son left his Primary school yesterday. I felt sick all day. I feel really down about it 🥲🥲. For all the reasons you've put. An end of an era 💔

Omg nooooo - my DS has just left reception and I’m having a crisis that he’ll be in year 1 next year 😭😭

I will be a mess when the time comes

You are not being unreasonable, but I found it passed quite quickly and I became focused on next steps. Was worse with my eldest, but with my youngest I was more prepared (ready?) Celebrate the wonderful time they have had, but look forward to the exciting times ahead. Arrange a get together with Primary friends over the summer and keep in touch for support when they all start Secondary. Our Primary group is still going strong and the eldest have just finished their second year at uni.

Also feeling very low about my DS leaving primary. His sister is really struggling at secondary and with her teens, and so I just have this dread that he'll go from being my happy boy to struggling too, as well as all the end of an era feelings

We've felt quite emotional about it but have had a very difficult few years with EBSA, referral for assessment (then diagnosis) of ASD, a move to a small unit for children with additional needs and the work to get DS to attend through to him finding that school can be enjoyable, making friends, engaging with learning, fantastic feedback from teaching staff and he's been doing so well.

And now it's over. He's moving on to a specialist ASD unit in a mainstream school, without any of the friends he's made. There's been an excellent transition with weekly visits to the new school and meeting with other new yr 7s, but it's still worrying as it's a big change for him.

So yeah, I've shed a tear when DS wasn't looking. I'm so proud of him and what he's achieved. And also can't believe how the last 11 years have flown by.