To not get children christened

[SpinningAround1]

I am not religious in anyway, I don’t believe in god or anything else, I feel I would be taking the piss put of the priest if I get my children christened?

so many people do it but have no beliefs, why?

It's not the old days anymore. Yes, many modern faith schools demand baptism as a factor of entry. It's been a big problem for many years, but yes, not a problem in the bloody 60s, 70s and 80s.

I voted you , for even asking

This is such a good explanation that I would be unable to articulate as clearly and just to add, my DC were baptised in the C of E and similarly were welcomed by the church family with no nominated God parents.

This reminds me of the old joke

Vicar 1: We've got a dreadful problem with bats in my Church. I don't know how to get rid of them. Any ideas?

Vicar 2: It's dead easy. Catch the babies and Christen them. I guarantee you'll never see them or their parents again

if someone with no religious beliefs makes promises in a church about raising their dc as a Christian, then they are obviously being dishonest

if I got to write my own version of the relationship I wanted my child to have with the church it would be different, but I don't get to do that.

At the same time I don't want to throw the baby out with the bath water. My children will be well aware of Christian teaching and it will be ultimately up to them.

I don't know anyone who is in literal agreement with every single thing the church teaches, even for the most devout there's always an element of compromise.

The old days 😂 this was in the 00s but ok… seems like I touched a nerve… as I said, many schools around here are C of E and take kids who aren’t christened.

Oh, we did explain the tenets of Christianity to our DDs. We also sent them to a C of E school (whilst being very honest about our mixed/no faith background and lack of church attendance). And then we explained the tenets of Islam, Judaism, Hinduism, Sikhism, paganism and atheism and let them get on with it. We also told the minister doing the baptism that we would be doing this.

TheKeatingFive, I don't disagree with your point, but there's a big difference between "I don't agree with the church's stance on x" and "I don't believe in God"

Neither I or my sisters have been Christened and neither is DD

I think a lot of people do it because we don't really have any other relevant rites of passage.

This. People have always used religion as a way of making sense of life through rites of passage. That has fallen away for most people in the west, but there's an argument that life seems a bit, well, meaningless without them. I got married in a church and christened my DDs more because of tradition / cultural Christianity than anything else. It's common in many religions. I know quite a few people who are only "culturally Muslim" and have no real belief or adherence.

"I don't agree with the church's stance on x" and "I don't believe in God"

Sure, but what seems to be missing from this conversation is acknowledgment of the power and influence of the church beyond the religious/divine.

I got a huge amount out of my religious ceremonies and education irrespective of a belief in god. I want some of that for my children also.

This. People have always used religion as a way of making sense of life through rites of passage

Exactly. In this sense the church is a victim of its own success really.

I think that you are being honest and wish all people thought the same as you. It is not some jolly or social event.

I supported the law change to allow weddings other than in registry offices or churches for the same reason. If you have no religious beliefs, then you should not expect a church to host an event where you don't believe, except if you are marrying a religious person.

Ah, okay. I read it as 'without a belief in a deity, you can't ever really mean a promise'.

But, yes, I see. You're obviously right. It means 'if you're not a Christian, you can't honestly make a promise to bring a child up as a Christian'.

Which is true.

I was brought up a Baptist. We didn't have Christenings. We had Dedications. That ritual essentially requires the whole community to promise to keep an eye on the kid, and help it along, until it's old enough to make decisions about what it's going to commit to.

I think you can do that without being Christian. Which is perhaps why I jumped to the wrong conclusion.

I apologise to @CraftyGin.

His worry is that if my only reference is the Bible when trying to teach her about Christianity at home, it will just reinforce it being factual instead of letting DD form her own beliefs.

This is exactly what my worry would be

I'm not religious but totally respect the beliefs of others. So no way would I go into a church and make promises I have no intention of keeping. I didn't get my children christened or be a godparent to anyone else's. Why lie?

No requirement to. Do nothing or have a naming ceremony.
Some people do as they or the family do identify as RC or C of E. Not weekly church goers but attend for Christmas, Easter, they themselves were baptised.
Yes some do it for school places primary or secondary. Depends on area for admission criteria and how good schools are.
In deprived town I used to work in schools were dire. Best in town was RC - baptised got priority. C of E was out of town required an expensive bus pass, christened and weekly attendance yr4 and 5. None religious option was tutor and try to get in 2 out of catchment
Grammars.

Will never get my children christened, and would never send them to a catholic school either.

My mother wanted me done as a baby-my dad flatly refused
neither do church,neither believe in god but I think she wanted to do ‘the done thing’,have a party and a piss up with a nice outfit for herself and a keepsake for me in my christening dress
dad didn’t want anything to do with it-although myself and my brothers went to the c of e school-only because it was 5 minutes down the road

years later,I produced the first grandchild,and the pressure from my mother was unreal-she’d go to hell if I didn’t have her christened
I laughed and flatly refused-again with her brothers and sister
i didnt see the need to have it done

my brother and sister in law had a baby and did have him done-it was pressure from both sides of the family,a party,presents,a piss up and nice outfits
apart from the christening itself,none of them have been to church before or since and the baby (now an 11 year old) didn’t go to a church school

bit pointless having him christened-it was done purely for attention,booze and photos