To be LIVID at the National Theatre?

[helpmeunderstand04]

I was at the National Theatre festival this Saturday which was advertised as outdoor live music, dance, performance, workshops and family fun. I thought great, perfect way to spend a Saturday.

We were there from 6:30 and the drag act on stage was promoting inclusivity and had, what started as a great message. They said...

'We need to teach our children to open their hearts, teach our children to open their minds and to teach our children to open their legs'. The last line was said with the same tone as if it was a risque joke.

Both me and DP are just disgusted by what we saw. We couldn't believe it. This act had a short dress on and their bulge was showing through out. It was just plain weird. Fine in a club, not at a festival literally targeted as being good for families.

From then the evening just got weirder. There was a drag queen and a drag king contest. Great! I literally had never seen drag king acts and was really excited and thought it was great representation and diversity.

However, with every single drag king act they took their clothes off. No drag queens take their clothes off, but the drag kings did and were showing their scars from their mastectomy/gender affirming surgery. I do get the message that they are proud and don't need to hide and really I do agree with that. But it just felt weird that women who now identify as men are still having to take their clothes off, where as the drag queens didn't remove one item of clothing.

AIBU in feeling angry at the marketing team at the national theatre?

Because “jokes” about encouraging children to open their legs aren’t funny.

It’s not a smutty, adult, risqué joke. Paedophilia isn’t funny, not for children but not for adults either.

I think on balance YABU to expect family fun geared to children as you arrived at the event in the evening (6:30pm) which is usually when the more adult shows start…and quelle surprise! You watched an adult show.

YANBU to complain about the specific “teach our children to open their legs” joke as that is disgusting and has no place in any show family or adult.

July 15-17: The Glory, featuring a drag queen contest, a party with DJs, drag life drawing, and a celebration of 50 years of Pride.

That’s the listing you saw in What’s On. Drag life drawing. So you took your DC to see nude drag artists and then were surprised that there were semi nude drag artists.

She didn't take her children.

So you’d prefer it to be like Telford or Rotherham then? Shit like joking about teaching kids to ‘open their legs’ is disgusting, I would hope even Guardian readers would agree with that….

It lowers boundaries, boundaries that are there to keep children safe from people who would harm them.

That’s the listing you saw in What’s On. Drag life drawing. So you took your DC to see nude drag artists and then were surprised that there were semi nude drag artists

If you read the OP’s posts she was mainly disgusted by the performer making “jokes” about encouraging children to open their legs.

Id love those posters who think this is ALL JUST FINE because it was supposed to be an adult show, to explain how paedophilic jokes are funny.

Completely unacceptable "joke" in any context.

I also think that if the festival as a whole is being marketed as having "plenty of activities for the whole family" then the theatre should make it very clear on the website which dates/acts are suitable for which age groups. I know some people find it obvious, but clearly others don't.

Complain about the joke

Complain about the lack of clear age advice. You shouldn't have to figure it out for yourself. kids see drag in libraries and on prime time bbc so it's not unreasonable for people who have only seen that side of drag, to think it would be ok for older kids.

It may make them reflect and change their vetting process and event marketing next time.

That is undeniably disgusting. Why would they come out with something like that. I won’t be going to any of their events now.

So what are you going to do @helpmeunderstand04 ?

Feel validated that the majority of posters agree with at least some part of your anger, or actually tell the programmers, the NT, why you think this was unacceptable?

Use your energy constructively. Outrage on a MN thread achieves nothing.

I’ll never forget a poster who talked about her experience as a child, I think it was on the thread about the Library Dildo Monkey. This poster wrote about her uncle who wore a “joke” apron in the kitchen that was a nude male with a floppy penis attached to it. It was a family “joke” how the uncle got her to touch the “joke” apron penis and how everyone thought it was hilarious. The uncle normalised this, and ended up sexually abusing the poster who was just a young child.

“Jokes” about child sex abuse are a huge red flag 🚩. Mary Whitehouse gets a lot of retrospective criticism and she wasn’t perfect, but with society’s predisposition to sexualisation of children I wish she was still around.

Between a society that thinks that paedophilia is funny, that Pride is the perfect place to expect to be able to laugh about CSA and all the posters on here who think that anyone who doesn't think paedophilia is hilarious is a budding Mary Whitehouse, this thread is an eye-opener about modern England

Isn't it just?

And always the same posters who rush to defend the indefensible ...

Casual paedophilia jokes. Charming.

I agree, the events listings are unclear. They've elided 'drag' and 'family fun' and I find that disingenuous at best.

Even at an adult event that 'joke' is unacceptable and I'd hand them their arses for it.

This - re drag queens. I've seen a few drag acts when I was younger (all the same, not that funny) and worked with in recent years a man who won a drag queen of the year contest, again, not that funny and nothing new.

I very rarely see Drag King acts so it seems to me that the Drag Queen side is all about parodying, sexualising, nasty, mocking, misognyistic, caricaturing of women. You'll get all the MN cool wives here who see nothing wrong in it.

Not suitable for kids at all and yes you should formally complain.

TRA .... they do what they want and don't care about others, very selfish.

People have surgery for all sort of reasons and don't feel the need to take clothes off and show everyone.

It's not for children. Make a complaint. So many attempting to push the trans agenda now

"I’ll never forget a poster who talked about her experience as a child, I think it was on the thread about the Library Dildo Monkey. This poster wrote about her uncle who wore a “joke” apron in the kitchen that was a nude male with a floppy penis attached to it. It was a family “joke” how the uncle got her to touch the “joke” apron penis and how everyone thought it was hilarious. The uncle normalised this, and ended up sexually abusing the poster who was just a young child."

Wow - normalise it and then abuse follows. Yep, the child doesn't realise it's not normal when adults find it funny.

“Jokes” about child sex abuse are a huge red flag 🚩. totally creeping sexualisation

"Because “jokes” about encouraging children to open their legs aren’t funny.
It’s not a smutty, adult, risqué joke. Paedophilia isn’t funny, not for children but not for adults either."

It's really sad and eye opening that you have to EXPLAIN this to others who don't see a problem! Safeguarding children should be paramount - no wonder so many are abused with the casual 'joke' references making it appear normal.

Teaching children to open their legs?!

I would be kicking up the biggest stink ever about that

Just to add im all for dark humour but joking about child rape is not something I find amusing. No one should. If you think that’s an acceptable joke, you need to think again

Regardless of whether it was for children or not, you need to complain formally to the NT or the local MP about the child sex joke. It is totally unacceptable and disgugusting. I’m sorry you had to experience this.

The spread leg comment was not on. It goes beyond poor taste and I would complain.

But I think YABU to be LIVID.

If you don't get livid about child sex abuse then I wonder what goes on in your head

It is obvious on the website. The family fun stuff is next weekend and it says clearly what shows are suitable for families.

And the joke, which I do not find funny, is not about paedophilia. Just because you do not understand drag show culture does not mean it is about paedophilia.

The show OP watched began at 7pm. The earlier shows were things like drag queens lip synching to dolly parton.

Personally I always checked out the suitability of shows that were not advertised for families before taking children. And the family fun relates to events over the whole month, NOT this last weekends events.