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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find it hard to work with people like this?

78 replies

Clementinecerise · 13/07/2022 19:10

I mean people at work who over plan EVERYTHING and who has must have a strategy or planning document for every single bloody action down to how many sheets of toilet paper they’re going to use that day in the office.

My current boss is like this. I work for a medium sized national charity. I floated the idea of an evening event for potential donors last summer. It will not have huge costs attached as we have a great venue so just catering. We have the budget.

As soon as I suggested it she asked me to put together an event plan, which I did. Since then I swear to god the plan has been discussed and analysed by everyone down to the bloody cleaner. It’s a simple concept. We have done these types of event before. They tend to be successful. I’ve had to update the plan at least ten times. Every time it’s ‘Can you write a summary of how this fits into our strategic aims?’ (to raise money?) Can you add in a couple of paragraphs about what we are hoping to achieve with this? (Done). And umpteen other questions. Every time I update it she will schedule a meeting at least a month away with yet another person in the organisation to ‘get their view’ which inevitably ends with more changes. A year has now passed, we had a meeting about it today, and she’s scheduled another fucking meeting with another person to discuss.

This is just one example. Everything - even a simple bloody meeting with a potential donor - has to be analysed and planned to within an inch of its life. Internal presentations to update the rest of the team need at least two planning meetings and a planning document and absolutely everything we do has to be scrutinised as to ‘how it aligns with our vision’.

I think it’s important to plan and am always well prepared for everything I do but I find her approach so painful. I have worked with people like this before and they kill productivity and progress IMO.

I also think people hide behind this stuff to avoid doing their actual job. I had a fundraising manager who spent nine months writing a strategy. Nothing else was done in that time. No meetings with donors, no new business development. Just the bloody strategy. When he finally produced it everyone read it, said how great it was and it was filed away. He’s now gone to another organisation where I bet he’s doing the same.

Planning is great and important but bloody hell some people overdo it.

Please hit me with your tales of similar colleagues!

Not interested in snark about how I’m obviously not very good at my job or similar btw, find another post if you’re looking for an argument.

OP posts:
Withthewind · 13/07/2022 19:21

You have different personality types. She probably hates you too.

Clementinecerise · 13/07/2022 19:26

Thanks, you sound lovely.

(looks for hide poster button)

OP posts:
IGotItInTheSales · 13/07/2022 19:29

agree with @Withthewind

SavoirFlair · 13/07/2022 19:30

@Clementinecerise i hold a senior positions in a national charities and have worked in many others . I could have written this myself - it is so so accurate.

Charities are wonderful places for collaboration. They are dreadful places sometimes for deadlines and action

Outside of sponsorship or national events, so many charities get mired in this endless referring and groupthink. It is terrifying.

two stages I would suggest:

Ownership Who actually owns your event from a senior level and why does it matter to them? If it doesn’t move the dial for them then you’ll keep getting fobbed off
Walk away I would suggest proactively pulling the event or facing off to anyone who claims to own it but keeps pushing the documentation stuff. Highlight where momentum has been lost, opportunities for engagement have disappeared - whatever it takes really

user1494050295 · 13/07/2022 19:30

Come and work in HE. We need great events people with initiative

SavoirFlair · 13/07/2022 19:31

IGotItInTheSales · 13/07/2022 19:29

agree with @Withthewind

@IGotItInTheSales @Withthewind I don’t think this has anything to do with “personality types”. Some things are just factual in workplaces. Do you work in charities?

or have you both come on here to give OP a smug little kicking, under the cover of “robustness” in AIBU, without actually understanding the problem ?

Let’s be honest - it’s the latter

Windbeneathmybingowings · 13/07/2022 19:32

I worked for a large national charity, every event had to have accountability for costs so I can understand that element.

However in day to day working life, it’s too much.

LoudingVoice · 13/07/2022 19:38

Oh my life my work is pretty much the opposite extreme, we put together whole public facing events with about 8 weeks max turn around, if we faffed about this much what the event was for would’ve been and long gone!

Can you suggest the event is tied to a particular month/theme/venue that has limited availability to get it moving? What on earth can there still be to discuss after all this time?

Clarinet1 · 13/07/2022 19:39

I feel your pain, OP. Yes, planning has to be done and charities have to get a return on fundraising investment but, from what you describe, it can be taken to such lengths that there is actually no time/energy/support for the actual core aim of the charity!

ILoveAllRainbowsx · 13/07/2022 19:40

I am worried about giving money to charity if it is going to be spent on someone writing a strategy for 9 months.

chiffchaffchiff · 13/07/2022 19:40

user1494050295 · 13/07/2022 19:30

Come and work in HE. We need great events people with initiative

Agree with this. We have some great events planners and some mediocre ones. The great ones are very quickly noticed across the university but especially by the highest levels of management. The pension isn't something to scoff at either.

user1494050295 · 13/07/2022 19:43

Where do you work chiffchaff if you are happy to say. I am in Zone 1

Jovanka · 13/07/2022 19:44

I have worked in charities - different sizes - for over 20 years and I recognise every word of your OP. It is stifling. The pre-meets and post-meeting debriefs absolutely do my head in.

MsTSwift · 13/07/2022 19:44

I felt frustrated just reading that! Maddening. Never experienced this myself any lawyer acting like that would be fired!

RealHousewifeOfEastLondon · 13/07/2022 19:45

I think you work for the charity I work for 😂 I sometimes feel my work life is constant planning and no actual doing because everyone is so risk adverse to the point that nothing gets off the ground 🙄

Allmyarseandpeggymartin · 13/07/2022 19:45

Ugh analysis paralysis - I hear you op

Although we’re now all Agile in IT now, launching the minimal viable product and “iterating” on it. Some people get it - others use it as an excuse to launch shit and get away with it

Fenella123 · 13/07/2022 19:46

This is why I loved working in the private sector. Granted, I was lucky with (most of) the companies I worked for, but in the end, the fact that everyone is there to make some money, to pay their rent etc, provides a deeply valuable clarity of purpose!

Clementinecerise · 13/07/2022 19:48

Thanks, glad I’m not alone. Not going to engage with the posters looking for a fight.

Sadly there is a lot of navel gazing in the charity world having worked in it first decades. Consultations and strategic planning days and people who are paid just to churn out shite that never sees the light of day again. Bottlenecks of boards and committees who put the kibosh on progress. When actually what’s needed is proactive fundraising, putting on events, going out and meeting people, and telling them about your charity’s work and why they should support it.

Boss also loves writing or getting me to write 6-8 page proposals on every single project we have that might interest a funder (these run into the hundreds) which gave to be run past umpteen people then sit in a file forgotten. I can write a proposal with 48 hours notice and have done many times and secured 6 figure gifts. Instead, so much time is wasted preparing proposals that no one has even asked for yet.

OP posts:
Clementinecerise · 13/07/2022 19:50

Ps didn’t know it had a name - analysis paralysis - describes my situation exactly!

OP posts:
ISeeTheLight · 13/07/2022 19:51

Oh god I worked for someone like that as a freelancer. Everything needed strategy documents. Pages and pages and pages and nothing was ever actually achieved. Did my head in.

FAQs · 13/07/2022 19:51

You are not being unreasonable, over complicating situations, you could have had the event twice by now and raised further funds without all the needless faffing.

Clementinecerise · 13/07/2022 19:54

FAQs · 13/07/2022 19:51

You are not being unreasonable, over complicating situations, you could have had the event twice by now and raised further funds without all the needless faffing.

Exactly! So much momentum lost already.

OP posts:
chiffchaffchiff · 13/07/2022 20:18

user1494050295 · 13/07/2022 19:43

Where do you work chiffchaff if you are happy to say. I am in Zone 1

Logged on to the browser version just to send as a PM (it's quite a niche University so very outing with everything else I post).

@Clementinecerise Another thought for HE. Have you considered Alumni relations? Our team does things to help support alumni but the main purpose is really to maintain relationships and fundraise through very successful alumni. I don't get to see the ins and outs as it's far removed from my own role but they recently managed to raise £1m from alumni to fund a very expensive piece of equipment (the other two thirds were from grants and the university itself). Your experience in fundraising could be a huge asset there.

OooErr · 13/07/2022 20:20

YANBU. Where I work has many people like this. Drives me crazy.
And it's such a waste of money!
How they remain employed I have no idea

OooErr · 13/07/2022 20:21

Allmyarseandpeggymartin · 13/07/2022 19:45

Ugh analysis paralysis - I hear you op

Although we’re now all Agile in IT now, launching the minimal viable product and “iterating” on it. Some people get it - others use it as an excuse to launch shit and get away with it

I work in IT and don't get me started on this..

Also people who can produce beautiful design documents but incapable of building something that won't breakdown completely within 5 secs of a user doing something 'unexpected'

Or so god help me