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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not allow DD to have acrylic nails?

71 replies

LeSighh · 09/07/2022 22:17

DD is going on holiday with my ex husband and his wife next week for 2 weeks. Her step mum is a nail technician and has said she will do acrylic nails for my daughter.

I've said no as I think she's too young (she's 14).

Ex husband says he doesn't have a problem with it and DD says I'm not being fair as her dad said it would be ok, plus her friends have had acrylics in the past.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Cameronnorrieisabitofalright · 09/07/2022 22:46

Don't be the bad guy here... They are nails not a tattoo!

eatingasatsuma · 09/07/2022 22:47

Just ask her to not get them done too long? That's a compromise.

Original poster
LeSighh · 09/07/2022 22:50

Ok, I'll admit defeat and let her get them done on the condition that her step mum removes them

OP posts:
Feelfreetocallme · 09/07/2022 22:51

At that age I had lip, stomach and eyebrow piercings

LtJudyHopps · 09/07/2022 22:55

Honestly you need to unclench. If her stepmum is a nail tech it’s even better as she’s not getting them done in a crappy shop. If your concern is she will pick them off ask the stepmum to keep an eye and take them off herself.
if you don’t allow her to get them done at home she will just go to a shop when she has some money. She’s 14 not 10.

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 09/07/2022 22:56

Well she'd have a job chewing acrylic nails ! Just have her step mum remove them before she goes back to school

MyMigraineAndMe · 09/07/2022 22:56

Perhaps her step mum could give her UV gel polish instead. It’s essentially diet acrylic- it only goes over the pre-existing nail so it doesn’t add any length, but it’s almost as durable as acrylic (it’ll have to be partially drilled off her nails when she’s done with it.)

That way she’ll still be able to get vibrant colours and perhaps a few inlaid rhinestones while she’s at it Grin

Discovereads · 09/07/2022 22:57

Ihatethenewlook · 09/07/2022 22:40

You are aware that nails grow? Any ‘damage’ will be gone in a couple of weeks. My 11yo got acrylics with French tips today for her prom. How do you think they need looking after exactly?

Show quote history

Please click on the link and read the article referenced in my post.
Physical nail damage is not the only damage that can happen, and no the damage would not be gone in “a couple of weeks” it’s more like a few months because you have to wait for the entire nail to grow out.

Bacteria and fungi in the gaps that form as the natural nail grows can cause infections and nail fungus. These gaps form in as little as 1-2 weeks. These can then cause scarring and permanent nail deformities if the infection reaches the nail root. There is also the small matter of swelling, pain, pus, redness.

Acrylic nails also use formaldehyde which is a known carcinogen. So not really the best idea to expose your DC to a completely avoidable cancer causing chemical.

bloodyplanes · 09/07/2022 22:59

Shes 14 not 4 Hmm

NortieTortie · 09/07/2022 23:02

Yabu and overbearing.

Happyplace88 · 09/07/2022 23:04

Old enough to look after them 😂 get a grip, they’re false nails, what do you think she will need to do to look after them?! And nail “damage”…hardly permanent, they grow back.

Mamai90 · 09/07/2022 23:06

ShaneTwane · 09/07/2022 22:24

She's 14 and her stepmothers doing them. Stop being so overbearing or you will damage your relationship with her.

100%

MyMigraineAndMe · 09/07/2022 23:07

Discovereads · 09/07/2022 22:57

Please click on the link and read the article referenced in my post.
Physical nail damage is not the only damage that can happen, and no the damage would not be gone in “a couple of weeks” it’s more like a few months because you have to wait for the entire nail to grow out.

Bacteria and fungi in the gaps that form as the natural nail grows can cause infections and nail fungus. These gaps form in as little as 1-2 weeks. These can then cause scarring and permanent nail deformities if the infection reaches the nail root. There is also the small matter of swelling, pain, pus, redness.

Acrylic nails also use formaldehyde which is a known carcinogen. So not really the best idea to expose your DC to a completely avoidable cancer causing chemical.

Show quote history

All very valid of course, but this is a one-off treat by the sounds of it. I’d only be worried about that kind of stuff if she was getting them regularly in a cheap, unsanitary nail salon

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 09/07/2022 23:08

I think I’d be compromising with you can have them, but not longer than your natural nails. And they must be taken off by her stepmum.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 09/07/2022 23:09

I was piercing my own ears at that age !

Vikinga · 09/07/2022 23:11

Acrylic nails look vile but they're the fashion along with all the other fake crap that makes people look like drag queens. I can't wait until it goes out of fashion.

EmeraldShamrock1 · 09/07/2022 23:11

Biab or gel overlays might be better to start with if DD isn't used to having long nails.

At 14 I wouldn't have a problem with it.

Original poster
LeSighh · 09/07/2022 23:16

NortieTortie · 09/07/2022 23:02

Yabu and overbearing.

Ok thanks

OP posts:
willithappen · 09/07/2022 23:16

@Discovereads I'm wondering if you read the article yourself that you have linked? Because even the article states 'yes and no'. The only real part there that would have any baring is the bacterial part, in which I'd suggest proper hand washing would go well. It's not very common at all for any infections based off this

GoodJanetBadJanet · 09/07/2022 23:18

She's 14. What's wrong with having nails at that age if she wants them?! Could see your point if it was a tattoo.
This coming from someone who hates fake nails and never have them.
She's not me though and everyone's different.

pastypirate · 09/07/2022 23:28

I opened this thinking the child would be 6!

If at 14 a young person can't make decisions about their own body there's something off.

Ihatethenewlook · 09/07/2022 23:36

Discovereads · 09/07/2022 22:57

Please click on the link and read the article referenced in my post.
Physical nail damage is not the only damage that can happen, and no the damage would not be gone in “a couple of weeks” it’s more like a few months because you have to wait for the entire nail to grow out.

Bacteria and fungi in the gaps that form as the natural nail grows can cause infections and nail fungus. These gaps form in as little as 1-2 weeks. These can then cause scarring and permanent nail deformities if the infection reaches the nail root. There is also the small matter of swelling, pain, pus, redness.

Acrylic nails also use formaldehyde which is a known carcinogen. So not really the best idea to expose your DC to a completely avoidable cancer causing chemical.

Show quote history

Oh behave 🙄 I’ve been getting acrylics for 30 years. My fingers haven’t rotted or dropped off. I don’t know a single person who’s had a single thing you’ve listed. There’s a potential risk with literally anything, that doesn’t mean you go through life with no enjoyment

Discovereads · 09/07/2022 23:38

willithappen · 09/07/2022 23:16

@Discovereads I'm wondering if you read the article yourself that you have linked? Because even the article states 'yes and no'. The only real part there that would have any baring is the bacterial part, in which I'd suggest proper hand washing would go well. It's not very common at all for any infections based off this

Read the whole article please. The “yes and no” is in regards to are they generally safe to wear. Not in regards to do they cause damage? Yes
Do they use carcinogenic chemicals? Yes
Do they risk nail infections? Yes.

There are even six tips on how to minimise damage if you do choose to wear acrylic nails anyway.

Smokealarmwakeup · 09/07/2022 23:39

BurbageBrook · 09/07/2022 22:21

Come on, she’s 14. She’s not getting a belly piercing. It’s nails in the summer holidays. Give her a break and loosen up- 99% of mothers wouldn’t have a problem with this. Is it because you secretly dislike/resent her doing a bonding activity with her step mum?

What’s wrong with a belly piercing?

Smokealarmwakeup · 09/07/2022 23:42

Vikinga · 09/07/2022 23:11

Acrylic nails look vile but they're the fashion along with all the other fake crap that makes people look like drag queens. I can't wait until it goes out of fashion.

Well I’ve been getting them for 16 years so any day now they will be out.

I don’t look like a drag queen because I’m not a man dressing as a woman, I look like someone with acrylic nails.