FIL is the type who doesn't lift a finger about the house, not even making a cup of tea for himself nevermind for someone else. When he visits he assumes best spot, top of the table and is basically waited on the entire time. He gets irritated by active kids and is very big on table manners particularly children not leaving the table until they ask and are given permission. We don't have this ritual performance in my house. The kids stay at the table while everyone eats and then help clear up. I don't wait on them, they get up to fetch juice or cups or ketchup etc as required for themselves or if someone else needs it. We don't do the permission thing, they just get up and start clearing with the adults(except him). There is no messing around or toys etc so it is just the asking permission thing that vexes him.
He always comes out with the line... In my days we had to ask permission... children have different expectations now and don't seem to understand manners and so on.
Tbh I've had enough of ignoring it.
It's really annoying me.
What can I say back with out causing a family row? I feel like it's gone unchecked long enough and he is basically bullying the kids who are now big enough to register and start feeling self conscious. I don't subscribe to kids being made to feel inferior or shy around adults, I want them involved.