Can anyone beat my idiocy?

[DillonPanthersFNL]

For 2 days we haven't had any heating Or hot water. 2 days! 2 days! Had the gas engineer out yesterday and he said it was an electrical problem so had the electrical engineer out today. Took him about 5 minutes! When the previous owner took the water tank out of the house and put a combi one in they left the immersion tank switch which is by the kettle in the kitchen and I went round on Monday eve and turned all the switches off.. this switch turned the boiler off completely

It cost £120 to flick a switch that I turned off!!

BRB going for a hot shower 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Been blooming freezing here! Only a bit warmer today as we've, finally, got some sunshine.

My dog chewed the plug off my hoover this morning.

I went out and bought a new hoover this afternoon and DH just said "why didn't you just change the plug" I have no idea why I didn't think of that

We checked the electrics and extractor fan in the bathroom to find out what was buzzing. Couldn't find a problem. Then phoned the plumber in case it was the pipes. Luckily before he arrived, DP realised he hadn't turned off his electric toothbrush properly and it was buzzing away in the bathroom cabinet. Eejit. 🙄

When DH and I bought our first house together the boiler was one of the very old fashioned ones that was behind an ancient gas fire in the living room. Took us ages to figure out that the boiler wasn't broken, the main control switch for it was just in a weird place in the living room that you wouldn't think to look, the previous owners had switched it off and hadn't left any information about the house for us moving in. They had emigrated abroad and also kindly left us an attic full of their shite that they couldn't be arsed to dispose of properly when they went.

Water all over the utility room floor, washing machine not working. Went out and bought new one, pulled out old one and found that mice had nibbled the hoses......

Not everywhere. I'm in Ireland and it's been freezing. Good weather and higher temperatures are on the way but it's been miserable

I kept having the alarm go off in the house, about 30 mins after we left the house. Could not figure it out.

It was a spider making a web over the sensor. The man we called out couldn't stop chuckling.

When I was very pregnant I got an electric shock from a lamp when changing the lamp. Then the baby stopped moving and I had a wee panic. After an icy drink and still no movement, we were sent to hospital to be checked out.

Hooked up, baby all fine, all is well.

The nurse asks if I'm okay after the electric shock. She says sometimes with a shock like that, there's an exit mark on palms or on feet. Do I have anything like that?

I look at my hands - fine. I check my feet... The nurse gasps. There's a fairly big dark circular mark on the sole of my feet. She RUSHES off, very concerned about the size of this exit mark, to find the nearest doctor. I am very surprised, it does indeed look quite spectacular.

The doctor arrives to examine me. He looks at my foot. He touches the exit wound...

It fell off. It was a giant chocolate button.

MORTIFIED.

When we moved into our house, first one we had bought to live in, we were annoyed when the oven wouldn't work...

Fortunately I found the isolator switch the next day. It was in a cupboard...

Once got a letter from our landlord, saying there was an inspector coming to check for asbestos in the loft. Whole street got them, we moaned about the inconvenience etc. On the morning, I was the first person he found at home. He was laughing... he pointed out none of us had lofts. None of us had picked up on this from the letter

@FuckingHateRats thats brilliant !

@FuckingHateRats thats's amazing! I have to ask though, did you eat the button afterwards 😂

A moment of complete idiocy that could have killed me: I once came home to a strong garlic-like smell. My immediate thought was “oh, yuck, was the pasta I cooked really that strong? 🤢” Opened the window, spritzed some air freshener, and didn’t think much of it until an hour later when I went into the kitchen to grab a drink… And heard a steady hiss from the hob.

I hadn’t fully turned off the cooker, and had been unknowingly gassing myself for the past 60 minutes 🙈

Does anyone know where OP lives? It’s July I live in the west of Scotland and there are times I need heating!! Not everyone lives in the south of England. …or even in the UK come to that!!

Found my people here. Never had a call out or new appliance but I have done some really REALLY stupid things over the years!

Oh god I bet you were kicking yourself. It sounds like something I'd do.

This one wasn't me, it was a customer in the shop I worked in many years ago. He brought back a toaster saying it wasn't working, I went out to the customer service desk and had a look, brought it into my office plugged it in, it heated up and seemed fine, went back out to him and said it was working and he was so angry that I exchanged it for him anyway. An hour later he arrives back into shop, slams down toaster and shouts that the fucking piece of shite wasn't working!, he was so pissed off, I went over to him, no calming him, everyone was looking, he rips the toaster out of the box and starts pressing the handle up and down saying look it's not staying down so it won't work. I took the toaster off him, unplugged the computer and plugged in the toaster and let him see it did work, I asked him if he he had plugged it in, he said of course he had but I'm thinking he didn't. Never saw him again.

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Loving this.

My boyfriend rang me to ask how to stop the pressure cooker from beeping. It was only when I told him to unplug it that he realised it was in face the fridge trying to tell him he'd left the door open

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

That's brilliant.

Glad you and baby are ok.

I read the title and assumed you were posting on behalf of Boris Johnson... 😁

I spent the first week in my new house, climbing over a brand new dishwasher that we were going to have fitted in our utility... That was until I opened a 'cupboard' and realised that it was in fact an integrated dishwasher 🤦 That was an interesting conversation with Curry's returns department 😂

Drove to the garage because my electric windows were stuck open. Mechanic gave me an odd look, pressed a switch on the drivers door and voilà!

Thats how I discovered the existence of the window lock button. Luckily my very lovely mechanic resisted the urge to laugh until after I left!

My first cold in over 18 months since lockdown. I was very light-headed (it was the virus that was called the 'super cold).

My anxiety took over and I decided that it was carbon monoxide poisoning. Because I realise that in the year and a bit I'd been living in the flat, I hadn't noticed any detectors. Nor had an inspection been done.

Began googling symptoms. Then thought I should just buy some detectors myself, better to be safe than sorry, I could bring it up with the LL later.

It wasn't for another day or so that I remembered I live in an all electric flat

@DillonPanthersFNL
"Do you just shower cold then ?"

No definitely not. We have one of those instant hot water ones- Mira - and we also turn the immersion on too for a short time for the main shower.
Have you seen comedian Des Bishop's Immersion routine on You Tube ?
It is hilarious.
I too am in Ireland. The east coast. It's not cold here thankfully.

Sorry to hear that you are going through chemo.
Wishing you all the best.

Bought a new fridge. Paid extra for installation as it was with some other new white goods. A day or two later it stopped working. Contacted the company, was pretty arsey about their "service" which I had paid extra for. Man came round. Found where I had pushed the coffee machine into the fridge switch.

I called an electrician to take out an old electric oven when we were ripping out the kitchen in our new house. He looked a bit bewildered but gallantly removed it - it was just plugged in not hard wired. Doh!