To ask if you could stay friends with people committing benefit fraud/tax evasion?

[WanderingWildflower]

Out of curiosity. This situation really annoys me but equally they are nice people and it's none of my business.

So these friends of mine are a couple. She owns a house outright that was purchased using inheritance. They both live in it and have done for over a year. He has a mortgage on his own house, bought before they met, and rents it out to a mate.

She doesnt work (small kids) but claims UC, not declaring that her partner actually lives with her. Meanwhile his friend pays him his rent in cash.

So essentially they have fraudulently claimed UC, a full time wage plus untaxed rental income coming in and no housing costs.

I suppose with the cost of living crisis it gets to me a little that we are having to tighten out belts a lot while they live the high life tax free/fraudulently.

I'm not the sort to cut people out but I'm so ethically opposed to people who do this that it sort of makes me question our friendship.

Could you stay friends in this situation?

The government aren't wealthy? Yes they are!

That's good for you and your boyfriend but I am not inventing barriers, they are well recognised.

Lone parents are massively disadvantaged in this country, those who have to pay massive private rental payments as they cannot afford to save for a deposit to buy and will never be able to afford no matter what they do.

It is not the majority of the population who are on benefits is it, it's a minority who are disadvantaged and the majority of benefits claimants don't fleece the system.

Why on earth would you create more barriers by calling them "underclass" and deny them the dignity of paying for food with money.

@JellyBellyNelly that's very true and I agree with you but it's not a level playing field so I juts can't get worked up about it when people who have so much privilege commit huge fraud

I don’t live in the UK so benefit fraud doesn’t affect me but it just seems such a low thing to do when other people are paying into it for the greater good.

I couldn't keep the friendship if I knew for certain that's what they were doing. My values and morals are far from theirs.

We are NC with Dh's brother for that reason. No moral compass at all. He is dead to us.

That is so extreme? A violent abusive crime I can understand cutting contact but fiddling some money ?
Do you seriously think someone is so evil they should be classed as dead to you? It's not murder

So an example which shows the post was wrong doesn’t count?

I genuinely can’t understand the views on here that people may as well not try, as there is supposedly some sort of conspiracy to hold them back.

If you believe that then of course you are not going to end up doing well.

No.

I know someone in a very similar situation. I know the ins and outs of their finances because they asked me for some financial advice and were unbelievably candid about the situation

It’s a decent description of the group I was referring to; those who commit fraud or condone it.

And yes, line parents can have it hard; I really wish people would delay having children until they had some savings behind them and were sure that their relationship was solid.

It’s heartbreaking to read posts of people in their early twenties on benefits, with multiple children and no job.

@FemmeNatal no one is saying that people shouldn't try, of course they should and do!

But not everyone can earn enough to stay above the poverty line and they never will, not for want of trying. Why can't you accept that?

Those people need support as they are struggling more than ever and I'm sorry I just can't get angry if they don't declare all they should so they can have an extra bit of money.

@FemmeNatal do you really believe life is that black and white.?

By that thinking a lot of people will just never be able to have children then.
Are you aware that so many people are unable to save?
Such a narrow minded and simplistic attitude that bears little reflection on actual real life

Do you use companies such as Amazon, eBay, Starbucks and many others that avoid paying their taxes? If so, then you’re not really “ethically opposed” to a little tax evasion - you’re just pissed that your friend seems to be doing better than you.

Direct your anger at those who deserve it, not who the red tops have made you believe are to blame.

I don’t know this much about my friends’ finances but if I did and knew this, then that would be enough to show me that they are not nice people after all.

And yes, line parents can have it hard; I really wish people would delay having children until they had some savings behind them and were sure that their relationship was solid.

Err you've seen the latest census figures?

So an example which shows the post was wrong doesn’t count?

But it doesn't prove the post was wrong does it because one example is not representative of the population!

I genuinely can’t understand the views on here that people may as well not try, as there is supposedly some sort of conspiracy to hold them back.

Where did anyone say about not trying?

But not everyone can earn enough to stay above the poverty line and they never will, not for want of trying. Why can't you accept that?

This is a terrible mindset to have, how judgey to write off a whole chunk of society as having zero potential to improve their earning potential!!

Everyone has the capacity to learn, grow, upskill, with the exception of a tiny minority eg those with disabilities that limit their ability to work at all.

Even for people temporarily struggling because (for example) they have young children etc, that doesn't last forever

Yes I would still be friends because

a). It's not my business
b) It's not for me to judge
c). I'm not a cunt
e) What goes around comes around
f). I'm not a cunt.

Sadly, it's benefit cheats like this that give genuine benefit claimants a bad name.

I couldn't be friends with her, report her for benefit fraud and move on.

I genuinely can’t understand the views on here that people may as well not try, as there is supposedly some sort of conspiracy to hold them back.

Just this sort of idea that nothing some people will do will improve their lot, it's like learned helplessness. It makes me really sad that people would feel that way.

So you agree with benefit fraud then?

I find it hard to understand why they think this dishonesty is acceptable, it's a very serious matter

I would report them too. Easily done on HMRC and DWPs websites. Anonymous too 😀

Erikbloodaxe

It doesnt make someone a cunt because they don't condone fraud.

What if OP was a police officer, or happened to work for HMRC or something, and felt duty bound to report obvious criminal activity?

For heaven's sake, I mean not everyone WANTS to or is capable! You know?

We will always need vital low skilled workers who work very hard proving essential services and are just as deserving of a decent standard of living.
Unfortunately those roles often pay low minimum wages and keep people in poverty.

I'm not suggesting people are choosing to stay in poverty but some people do have many factors that can hinder progress.

It's not offensive it's a fact

And before someone starts, it's really NOT personal, the government rob us blind on the daily.

So you are a net contributor AND you are paying for private education and health I assume?