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Original poster

What advice would you give your mid twenties self?

49 replies

Skye197 · 04/07/2022 20:22

I’m in my mid twenties and struggling with anxiety and feeling a bit lost. Would advice would you give your mid twenties self?

OP posts:
ginslinger · 04/07/2022 20:28

You are much better than you think you are. You live for you and make sure that you walk away from anyone who makes you feel less than good about yourself,

halfsiesonapotnoodle · 04/07/2022 20:30

There is no need to have children.
There is no need to get married or live with anyone.
You don't have to live the same life as everyone else. Do your thing!

Namechanger355 · 04/07/2022 20:32

you are still so young and the world is literally your oyster

Don’t be in a relationship which doesn’t respect you or fulfil you - that person isn’t the one for you and you need to move on

health is your number one wealth - start looking after it now

status and popularity means very little - nurture your family and true friends - it’s quality not quantity that matters

start saving and investing

SRK16 · 04/07/2022 20:33

I had terrible mental health issues - primarily stemming from anxiety- through my teens until my mid 20’s. So I would say..

No one really is paying that much attention to everything you say and do, they’re not siting there waiting for you to say something stupid, and probably aren’t even paying tat close attention. If they remember you saying something stupid, they’re unlikely to care.
People are too self involved to be sitting there thinking about what a shit person you are, no one thinks that except you.
Dont feel you always have to say yes to invitations, but make sure you keep socialising a bit.
Everything will work out in the end.

SilverGlitterBaubles · 04/07/2022 20:34

Take time to travel, to explore, to experience different things, don't be in a rush to settle down get out there and make the most of it.

Goldencarp · 04/07/2022 20:35

I’d advise myself to travel more, do a job that makes me happy and get sterilised!

MsVestibule · 04/07/2022 20:37

Loads, but the best one for me would be 'don't take any shit from men'. Not one of my successful relationships (even if they eventually ended) started with a man messing me around or me being unsure of where I stood with him.

Happily married now, but when I think of the emotional energy I spent on 'breadcrumbing' men, wondering whether he was interested or not, makes me roll my eyes at my 20 something self.

escapingthecity · 04/07/2022 20:37

Absolutely do not sleep with that guy or that guy. And definitely do not wait around for their calls.

obsessedwithsleep · 04/07/2022 20:37

Drink less!

paddingtonstares · 04/07/2022 20:40

By mid 20s it was too late, I had a family, but aged 18..do not get involved with an older man, don't have children..travel, experience the world, ignore your mother and grandma, you can do these things, work on your confidence.

Cas112 · 04/07/2022 20:40

Everything will work out

Palmfrond · 04/07/2022 20:41

Shop around, find something that you enjoy, be it hedge fund manager or hedge layer, then fake it till you make it.

EmmaH2022 · 04/07/2022 20:42

Follow the money
jobs and industries are basically the same so just follow the money and the shortest commute

look at what your bosses are measuring your performance on, not the quality of your work, which many will not notice

listen for the subtext

never talk about the elephant in the room

took me till nearly 30 to f

ellie21 · 04/07/2022 20:42

To believe in myself more.
To leave the toxic relationship.
To give it a rest with the drinking.
To give it a rest with the sunbathing.
To travel everywhere and anywhere.
That it isn't about being exactly like everyone else.

Palmfrond · 04/07/2022 20:42

And travel as much as you can afford to.

EmmaH2022 · 04/07/2022 20:42

*igure that out

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 04/07/2022 20:43

Do what you want. Not what you think other people want for you. Don't worry about looking silly - in 10 years time you'll have probably forgotten those people's names!

Be brave, take a chance, if you don't try you'll never know if you would have suceeded. If you don't try you will regret not knowing if you could have done it.

A relationship should make you happy. It shouldn't be hard work, at that young age it should be almost completely fun. If there's angst, conflict, worry or sadness then jack it in, you're better than that and you don't want to get to the point of having kids and a mortgage and realising the little bit of fun you had is gone and all is left is the angst, conflict, worry and sadness. Trust me - the first thing that goes is the fun.

PiffleWiffleWoozle · 04/07/2022 20:43

Save more money, do more exercise.

Mochatatts · 04/07/2022 20:44

Travel
Don't feel like you have to get married or have kids
Dogs/cats are great company too
Do what makes you happy
Date yourself
You are enough
Don't do for friends who aren't prepared to do for you
Have boundaries and stick to them

Palmfrond · 04/07/2022 20:45

Go with your own style.

Get in shape and look after your body, not for other people but for future you

Drskincare · 04/07/2022 20:46

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Veryverycalmnow · 04/07/2022 20:46

Don't waste money on alcohol or cheap clothes that don't last!

Hoolihan · 04/07/2022 20:46

Invest in yourself. Be your own best friend. Indulge your interests. Enjoy your free time. Read, travel, stay single.

Wartywart · 04/07/2022 20:48

Don't allow your friends to put pressure on you to live your life / stay with a partner that you don't want to stay with. You won't still be close friends with many of those people 10 or 15 years from now, so keeping them happy at your own expense is pointless. Also remember, you have the right to be happy too - your life matters too - you don't have to spend it keeping everyone else happy.

Possibly get help for your anxiety. It can make you freeze like a rabbit in headlights, and freezing for years is a waste of your precious life.

anybloodyname · 04/07/2022 20:48

Save a little money

Say NO more often

Put yourself first

Don't settle