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He screenshoots my email messages to him and sends them to his sisters?????

44 replies

YetanotherPGCEdropout · 04/07/2022 04:05

Ok-Single mum here. Met an old school friend who now lives in Scotland. I'm in Wales. He wanted a "message only/no phone calls or meet ups" friendship. (I don't know why I agreed, but I did.) He was going through a divorce. So we get into a daily "make each other laugh" thing via email, until his answers began to seem..... a .... bit.... hmmm... He admitted to screenshooting my emails, sending them to his two sisters, for evaluation and help with reply comment. 🙀😬😥😥So so so so so humiliated. I stopped the friendship with him.

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 04/07/2022 04:12

There was no divorce.

YetanotherPGCEdropout · 04/07/2022 04:15

Ah.... you are probably right Aquamarine 1029

OP posts:
RenegadeMatron · 04/07/2022 04:20

He wanted a "message only/no phone calls or meet ups" friendship. (I don't know why I agreed, but I did.)

If you agree to do stuff you know is questionable - and ignore your discomfort around the red flags and whatever else is instinctively telling you something is ‘off’ - you will end up in a situation you don’t want to be in.

Lesson learnt.

Next time, if it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it.

MrsTerryPratchett · 04/07/2022 04:23

He wanted a "message only/no phone calls or meet ups" friendship. (I don't know why I agreed, but I did.)

The only correct response to this is "yeah, no thanks". When he is allowed weird boundaries and you aren't allowed any boundaries, this is what happens.

Set your bar much higher.

YetanotherPGCEdropout · 04/07/2022 04:26

Good advice mrs pratchett and matron - I have learnt not to play these dangerous online games.... and assume that the recipient was trustworthy. Clearly he was a creep and had no respect for me at all. My fault for falling for his charming ways.

OP posts:
RedWingBoots · 04/07/2022 04:31

OP his ways aren't charming.

You just let your guard down because he is an old school friend.

Anyway just let this relationship die out after all you are a very busy single mum.

YetanotherPGCEdropout · 04/07/2022 04:32

True words Ms Boots

OP posts:
YetanotherPGCEdropout · 04/07/2022 04:36

He was just wanting me to give him attention.
And looking on the positive side.... maybe I inadvertedly educated his dismal sisters in a few things that go on in the in.tim.ate side of life? After all, if those women are all about reading your brothers emails and telling him what to say,... ... uh....
eeekkk
Glad to be free of that situation, and won't be fooled in the future.

OP posts:
knittingaddict · 04/07/2022 04:46

Weird to send them to his sisters. Op, it could just as easily have been his mates down the pub. You made the right decision to end this now.

psychomath · 04/07/2022 05:03

Sorry, I might be being really thick here but I don't totally understand the situation - when you say you were friends and these were messages to make each other laugh, were they intimate/flirty or were you just sending each other silly jokes and anecdotes and things? I don't think that sharing the latter with his family members would be too outrageous, although it would be very weird that he felt the need to get other people's input on how to reply in a casual conversation (and I'd probably back off anyway on that basis alone). If it was more personal stuff then that's obviously completely unacceptable to share behind your back. Either way, sounds like you're well out of this 'friendship'.

CrikeyPeg · 04/07/2022 06:27

Ewwww, major weirdo alert right there (talking about the whole family, not just him btw)

Mally100 · 04/07/2022 06:27

RenegadeMatron · 04/07/2022 04:20

He wanted a "message only/no phone calls or meet ups" friendship. (I don't know why I agreed, but I did.)

If you agree to do stuff you know is questionable - and ignore your discomfort around the red flags and whatever else is instinctively telling you something is ‘off’ - you will end up in a situation you don’t want to be in.

Lesson learnt.

Next time, if it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it.

X1000!! You should be asking yourself why you accepted this?

NotAHouse · 04/07/2022 07:11

It's "screenshot".

HollowTalk · 04/07/2022 07:25

What a weird man. I agree there's no divorce but what kind of messages was he showing his sisters?

SleeplessInEngland · 04/07/2022 07:29

depends on the content, obviously. If they were inane jokes I don’t see the harm, although I don’t know why you’d want a message only ‘relationship’ anyway.

loobylou10 · 04/07/2022 07:39

@NotAHouse - and that is your takeaway from this thread!! Helpful

SuffolkBargeWoman · 04/07/2022 07:44

@loobylou10
Agree that @NotAHouse 's comment wasn't directly helpful, but it does mean that the OP now knows how to spell it? Which might be useful in the future.

loobylou10 · 04/07/2022 07:45

@SuffolkBargeWoman gosh, yes, I never thought of it like that. So helpful should she ever need to spell it in the future.

PutinIsAWarCriminal · 04/07/2022 08:07

NotAHouse · 04/07/2022 07:11

It's "screenshot".

I hate posters who do this with a passion. What do they want, a slow hand clap and sticker?

Greenyinabottle · 04/07/2022 08:13

psychomath · 04/07/2022 05:03

Sorry, I might be being really thick here but I don't totally understand the situation - when you say you were friends and these were messages to make each other laugh, were they intimate/flirty or were you just sending each other silly jokes and anecdotes and things? I don't think that sharing the latter with his family members would be too outrageous, although it would be very weird that he felt the need to get other people's input on how to reply in a casual conversation (and I'd probably back off anyway on that basis alone). If it was more personal stuff then that's obviously completely unacceptable to share behind your back. Either way, sounds like you're well out of this 'friendship'.

Plus one. I also don't get the situation.

WisherWood · 04/07/2022 08:14

We only have his word for it that he sent them to his sisters. I very much doubt that's true. More likely they were flirty messages he shared with his mates down the pub for a laugh and to wind the OP up a bit.

Jconnais1chansonquivavsenerver · 04/07/2022 08:20

Also, there could be an argument for the verb "to screenshoot". Urban Dictionary defines it, for what it's worth!

ChardonnaysBeastlyCat · 04/07/2022 08:22

Why would he need to screenshot, he could just forward them?

Either way, it's odd.

Swimmingpoolsally · 04/07/2022 08:23

What do you mean educated his dismal sisters on the intimate side, were you sending him sexual stuff? And why are his sisters dismal, it is hardly their fault. Why blame the women?

ChardonnaysBeastlyCat · 04/07/2022 08:26

Oh, just saw the "intimate" bit. Missed that because it was written in an odd way.