Pride doesn’t represent me

[Vegansausageroll]

Just been watching Joe Lycett’s big pride party.
It was all sexualised smut. It’s ‘furries’ , kink, drag, sex and innuendos galore. This isn’t all what pride is about! It’s supposed to be about our sexuality and our rights and not being ashamed of who we are. But there is no representation for young people like I was! I want people to be themselves and express themselves but it all just seems so extreme now!

I’m a middle aged gay woman. I like books and countryside walks!

I am very worried about equal rights and the way they are, once again, under threat.
I have nothing in common with the people that now dominate ‘pride’. The last woman’s group I went to has long been shut down, as have the lesbian groups I used to attend back in the day. I’m worried gay youth are being sent a message that their sexuality must be linked to a certain type of ‘lifestyle’ when many of us just want to live a regular life the same as our straight friends - the only difference is the sex of our partners 🤷‍♀️.

Lots of gay men go by she/her when in drag. Pretty standard.

YANBU. I'm cis and straight but work with LGBTQ+ people, mostly youths. Increasingly we have young people telling us that they don't feel they fit in in their own community, particularly those who are disabled who find support events like Pride and community organised gatherings to be completely inaccessible. There's no point pushing for acceptance if only a small group of people are representing the entire group.

DD went this weekend to pride in our town her comment was:

'it was all middle aged men and a straight version of pride'

I think she was right.

All men. Disturbing.

I feel sad the idea of being told that if a woman wants to explore lesbianism she has to go online @akittyisyou

😂
Another person with so much intellect and such sound logic that they can only try to put down the words of someone they disagree with.

Plenty of bi women find the exclusivity of lesbians upsetting. I'm not lecturing anyone, just stating my case.

Some lesbians are not inclusive of other non-straight women. Others are very inclusive. If you are a bi or lesbian woman who spends time around a lot of other no straight women I'm sure you've experienced both extremes, as I have. I choose to spend my time in spaces that are inclusive of all women, with people who don't wish to erase the identity and experiences of others.

Actually, you'll find most of us are in our late 20s and 30s. We just keep quiet until it counts, and we make our voices heard in other ways.

Because otherwise we just get shut down by vocal deniers like you. Be ashamed of yourself, frankly. You are no ally to anyone.

YANBU

My gay friends don’t take part.
They don’t describe themselves as ‘queer’ -
They are not interested in ’furries’, kink, drag, sex and innuendos galore
They are ordinary people living ordinary lives. They said the likes of JLy make their skin crawl.

I think this nails it....I was in London yesterday with my 2 daughters to see Adele at Hyde Park (amazing btw) and mentioned to my eldest it's pride as well .....as a 20 year old lesbian she did a massive eye roll .....pretty much sums it up. Yep you are who you are .....which is fabulous ..... enjoy life, the media have over hyped it so it becomes a bigger thing than it actually is? 🤔

Agreed 💯 @MiniPiccolo

My local Pride has drag queens and glitter and men in harnesses, but also a bookshop and mobile library, stalls run by various community groups (including a women's cycling group, a composting group, activities for over-50s and a nature reserve), several churches and plenty of lesbians.

Another person with so much intellect and such sound logic that they can only try to put down the words of someone they disagree with

Implying that I have low intellect is an ad hom. Criticising your argument is the precise opposite of an ad hom.

Errrm, that's not really accurate.

MPJ was ambivalent about which pronouns were used about him.

Then, as now, in full drag, he used female pronouns to describe himself, at other times it was a mixture of both.

From the accounts of people who were involved in the Riots & gay rights in NYC at the time, MPJ wasn't particularly active due to ongoing serious MH issues & a well-documented drug & alcohol addiction.

Save your breath-anything other than total capitulation to the TWAW catechism means you are, de facto, transphobic and want to murder all LGBTQ+ types.

Ach, I know, vipers, I am just pedantic!

Agree-it's hard not to respond to manifest bollocks.

Hah - the Sedgwick book is precisely about the first-hand experiences and history of gay men during the early Pride era - so you say you want to listen to real LGBT people and talk about erasing Marsha P Johnson; but you simultaneously want to dismiss the first hand testimony and history of what actually happened and those people’s actual historical experience?

Righty ho. So it’s only the fake Tumblr/Twitter misinformation trans version of history you want - not the actual history of actual gay people who were actually there at the time.

I think we all know why you prefer the fake history to the real one tbh. Doesn’t require any actual work or reading or listening, just Twitter sound bites; and, (as a pp said upthread), fake keyboard activism that’s a laughable parody of the real activism gay people actually did to change things.

There’s a reason we say lived experience, and not read-it-on-Tumblr experience.

Not in the UK they’re not. There have hardly ever been any trans murders here.

Our local pride event was lovely this year, it was organised by local youth groups with an emphasis on different cultures...... I was very impressed and it made me think how someone who maybe felt isolated because of their religion hopefully felt supported that day.

Im not even gay but often get taken along to events by friends, we'd never go to somewhere like London or Manchester it's just too ott. Smaller towns or something like Lancaster pride have a far better feel.

None of my gay or bi friends are into these labels/lifestyles/stereotypes. They al find them bloody irritating AF. I live in Aus and we have finally voted the fundamentalist Christian (smug bastard)PM out of town. I have been saying for ages that Australia needs a Women’s Party, so that we are properly represented. On of my lesbian friends said that in theory it’s great, but the whole gamut of alphabet soup that makes up LGBTQ would invade and insist that everything be about them and their agendas.

Also:
Frankly, fuck anyone who is trying to erase the identity of others. I've yet to come across a trans person who wishes to erase women and our rights.

Why; all you have to do is log on to social media, the Twitter feed of any woman thought to be a “terf” (or drop by terfisaslur for example), and you can fall across these people before you can blink. There are violent death threats a-plenty all over the internet towards lesbians who inconveniently don’t want to sleep with male bodies; and none that I know of the other way around.

I’ve attended a few pride events with my 2 oldest friends, a lesbian and a trans woman. Neither will attend now because it’s less
about orientation and more about kink which isn’t their thing, so YANBU OP. Where someone’s sexual orientation or sexual practices preference does not involve kink, or fetish, Pride no longer seems to represent them. It’s no longer a protest movement & is just another hallmark money-making, virtue-signalling event.

I also get annoyed when I see parents being called pearl clutchers for not wanting their kids to see fetishistic behaviours on a public high street. Being gay is not synonymous with being into BDSM but pride doesn’t separate the two and youth are having that
conflation normalised.

Bloody hell -- now we have gay-face 🙁

@theclangersarecoming
I agree. I'm not transphobic in anyway. I'm a femine woman who is attracted to femininity and vaginas/boobs. Couldn't care less of that offends anyone. Call me what you want but I won't be bullied into dating/sleeping with anyone. I'm actually off a lot of social media now. What is happening to the world🙈🙈

I watched some of the Joe Lycett thing and it struck me as being a bit dated? The stereotypical catty gay guy in eyeshadow, the innuendo, Joan Collins etc - all the old tropes in one tv show.