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Original poster

Birthday present complaint

99 replies

BeepyBoo · 30/06/2022 20:35

Just want to run this past you to see what you think, and whether this is reasonable.
My DS went to some twins’ birthday party. To provide context…The family live near us and the twins often spend time around our house - several times a week - although I’d say their mother is more of an aquaintance (we are always friendly, but she keeps to herself a bit).
I bought the twins both a sports ball each and some shin pads each, which is more than I would usually spend on presents for a party, but we do know the twins well. Basically, 4 weeks later, the mother has sent me photographs of both of the balls, which have both ripped apart a bit. She has asked whether we have the receipt, to exchange them.
I am feeling a bit irked by this. I think it’s the photos that have bothered me. Basically I would never do this if someone bought my children presents. To save them embarrassment, I would just replace the balls myself and not mention it. The balls cost £8 each, so not cheap, but also probably more budget as balls can cost a lot.

We do not have the receipt - my husband chucked it. So, I’m thinking - should we replace them?! Am I right to feel a bit uncomfortable? It’s not a big deal but Would appreciate your thoughts, thanks.

OP posts:
Floralnomad · 30/06/2022 21:02

I don’t think it’s rude at all , just message back and say you don’t have the receipts but you bought them from x shop and then leave her to deal with it .

MayMoveMayNot · 30/06/2022 21:03

Wtf? Seriously people think its OK to ask someone for the receipt for a kids present?

It's called a gift! Surely there is limits on who you ask these sorts of things from? If it was my mum or close family member that I had a good relationship with I might ask as we have a good relationship and are open about things like that. But a friendly acquaintance? Fuck no.

If it breaks, it breaks. You need to either replace it yourself or just just leave it, it's v v cheeky to ask for the receipt so you can claim a new one or exchange!

Original poster
BeepyBoo · 30/06/2022 21:04

EarringsandLipstick · 30/06/2022 20:58

She’s implying the presents bought by the OP are poor quality

Well, they are poor quality if they have both fallen apart in a few weeks.

That's not OP's fault & she really should have put the gift receipt in.

I don't think I'd have done it myself, to be honest, but I don't think she's done something wrong.

That’s not the point - if you receive presents, you don’t take photos of them when they break and then send the photos to the person who bought you the presents. With the shin pads as well, I spent a lot in total for a kids birthday party, as there were two children. But now I do feel it’s as if she’s saying I’m cheap. It’s just not polite.

OP posts:
EarringsandLipstick · 30/06/2022 21:06

But now I do feel it’s as if she’s saying I’m cheap. It’s just not polite.

Like I say, I wouldn't do it more because I'm lazy

But you're overthinking this. Your gifts are fine! Not cheap, of course not.

She just wants to know if she can bring them back - the photos are to explain why.

Just say you don't have the receipt and stop thinking about it.

Flowerymess · 30/06/2022 21:06

It does come across as rude but I'd give her the benefit of the doubt, you've said that she keeps herself to herself maybe she's socially awkward and this is a situation that's she misjudged.

There's defo no need to replace them. Just say you don't have the receipt and leave it at that.

Luidaeg · 30/06/2022 21:08

She wants to take them back to where they were bought as they are faulty

What's wrong with that??

Much worse if she binned them and thought the op was cheap??

Original poster
BeepyBoo · 30/06/2022 21:09

EarringsandLipstick · 30/06/2022 21:06

But now I do feel it’s as if she’s saying I’m cheap. It’s just not polite.

Like I say, I wouldn't do it more because I'm lazy

But you're overthinking this. Your gifts are fine! Not cheap, of course not.

She just wants to know if she can bring them back - the photos are to explain why.

Just say you don't have the receipt and stop thinking about it.

She can say that in one sentence, without sending three photos to show how ripped they are. Also, even asking for the receipt 4 weeks later, or at all, is rude. I’m not over-thinking - mumsnet is for chatting. I just disagree with you that this is ok. 😂😂

OP posts:
SmileyPiuPiu · 30/06/2022 21:10

I think she's possibly sent you the pictures so you know she's not planning on taking them back perfectly fine and unused to get the cash? So I can see why you think its a bit off but she's possibly trying to show they are wanted gifts not like when someone asks so they can take them back for the cash/something else.

RJnomore1 · 30/06/2022 21:10

Look at it as she doesn’t want you to have wasted your money.

SmileyPiuPiu · 30/06/2022 21:11

BeepyBoo · 30/06/2022 21:09

She can say that in one sentence, without sending three photos to show how ripped they are. Also, even asking for the receipt 4 weeks later, or at all, is rude. I’m not over-thinking - mumsnet is for chatting. I just disagree with you that this is ok. 😂😂

Show quote history

If she didn't send the photos you might think she's lying and just wants to exchange them. Which is even ruder

Needmorelego · 30/06/2022 21:12

Footballs should last longer than 4 weeks.
I would be annoyed at a retailer/manufacturer if they sold me poorly quality footballs.
She probably just wants to know where you bought them so she can either get them replaced or complain that they aren't fit for purpose.
All you have to do is say "no I don't have the receipt anymore but they came from X Shop" and she can take it from there.

Original poster
BeepyBoo · 30/06/2022 21:13

Oh god, I give up. Being this rude when you receive gifts from an acquaintance has now obviously become the norm. I should start sending people photos of their gifts when they break! 😂 somewhere I missed the memo that this is now acceptable.

OP posts:
EarringsandLipstick · 30/06/2022 21:13

I’m not over-thinking - mumsnet is for chatting. I just disagree with you that this is ok

Er, yes? And I disagree with you - that's also ok.

I think you're being really unfair on her. She simply asked you for the receipt, sending you photos to explain why.

If it irks you, just reply & then leave it.

You've one view but can't you see she might not be thinking the way you imagine? (I mean, maybe she is! But there's no evidence for that).

MayMoveMayNot · 30/06/2022 21:13

OK I can't win 🙄

I've mentioned this to DH and he's said 'I can see the mums logic, what's the harm?'

I asked him if he would do it though?

'No, too awkward.'

😁

EarringsandLipstick · 30/06/2022 21:14

BeepyBoo · 30/06/2022 21:13

Oh god, I give up. Being this rude when you receive gifts from an acquaintance has now obviously become the norm. I should start sending people photos of their gifts when they break! 😂 somewhere I missed the memo that this is now acceptable.

People are just giving you their views OP!

Ok you see it differently - that's fine, but some of us don't see it as rude.

She really may not have intended any disrespect.

MayMoveMayNot · 30/06/2022 21:14

BeepyBoo · 30/06/2022 21:13

Oh god, I give up. Being this rude when you receive gifts from an acquaintance has now obviously become the norm. I should start sending people photos of their gifts when they break! 😂 somewhere I missed the memo that this is now acceptable.

You and me both OP 😂

Original poster
BeepyBoo · 30/06/2022 21:14

SmileyPiuPiu · 30/06/2022 21:11

If she didn't send the photos you might think she's lying and just wants to exchange them. Which is even ruder

Show quote history

Yes of course I would think she’s lying, and would need to exchange a…..football? Seriously…..😂

OP posts:
Philisophigal · 30/06/2022 21:14

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn at the user's request.

Georgeskitchen · 30/06/2022 21:15

CFery of the highest order going on here. Just politely say no sorry no receipt, and hope that's the end of it 😉

SmileyPiuPiu · 30/06/2022 21:18

BeepyBoo · 30/06/2022 21:14

Yes of course I would think she’s lying, and would need to exchange a…..football? Seriously…..😂

Show quote history

They might have been given footballs by someone else too so could then get 2 x £8 to put towards some trainers.

bridgetreilly · 30/06/2022 21:18

You do not need to replace anything and she is super cheeky to mention it.

SmileyPiuPiu · 30/06/2022 21:18

Ps do they have a dog? Wonder if it's destroyed them.

EarringsandLipstick · 30/06/2022 21:19

bridgetreilly · 30/06/2022 21:18

You do not need to replace anything and she is super cheeky to mention it.

No one asked OP to replace anything. 🙄

Bimblybomeyelash · 30/06/2022 21:20

I think it’s a bit weird to ask for a receipt a month after receiving a gift. Of course the gift giver isn’t still going to have the receipt, and you risk them feeling awkward/guilty about giving a faulty gift.

SheldonesqueTheBstard · 30/06/2022 21:20

I agree with earrings and rj

She hasn’t asked you to replace them - that would have been rude .

If you had the receipt, I’m sure she would have put forward a good case for them to be exchanged .

Also, she might be wanting to stop you getting more footballs from there for the kids you know. It is a waste of money if they have been through a less than robust manufacturing process. 🤷🏻‍♀️