Neighbour hammering at 5.00am.

[stirling]

This is an absolute bastard of a neighbour who has decided to embark on a journey of persecution that's gone on for years. Elderlyish couple, late 60s. They're like church mice during the day but at night, they slam cupboards, hammer, move pots about in the garden, use at around 3,4 or 5.

I've tried writing, polite requests, turning up at the door in my nightie. I have an inflammatory bladder condition that causes sleep derivation already. They know about this, their daughter is a consultant urologist.

Last night at 5 I just screamed through the walls, that they're sick bastards. Previously the only thing that has worked is me blasting out my music during the day. Then they stop for a few weeks.

I don't go to the council as I've heard they don't do anything. Plus you need to record it. That's really hard as it's very sporadic and loud enough to wake you but not thumping like a heavy based sound system.

I'm dealing with so much at the moment, death of my dad, death of my niece, single parenting two teens on my own, I'm literally breaking.

How do I stop their sociopathic behaviour once and for all?

If the noise is having this much effect on you, then I’m surprised you haven’t gone to the council. Just saying that you ‘heard they won’t do anything’ then not contacting them guarantees that nothing will get done because they don’t know about the problem.

Find out what your council’s policy is on noise complaints and follow that. You might need to record it or make a noise diary but unless you’re prepared to take some action yourself, your neighbours aren’t going to magically stop being twats.

Just be a little bit careful about reporting to the council if you own your home and think you might have to move because of this: neighbour disputes have to be declared.

Sorry for your losses and that you’re going through this.

This sounds so awful. I'm so sorry OP 😪

Thank you for your replies. Yes one of the reasons I didn't go via the council or lawyers is because when it's logged as a noise dispute, makes both properties harder to sell. I'm definitely not living out the rest of my life in this awful place. But got to get through the next four or five years for the kids....

Going the council route is hard work emotionally. Recording each time something annoys you really reinforces the problem for you.

DATE
STARTS
FINISHES
DESCRIPTION OF THE NUISANCE
HOW IT AFFECTS ME

Every time. It gets depressing.

How do they know about your bladder condition? From their daughter? Complete breach of confidentiality if so, maybe mention that to them and see if that encourages a bit of quiet....

Have you tried using ear plugs? I find the wax ones very good and sleep through anything with them in. Even grandchild screaming during the night in the same house!

Oh, commiserations. My neighbour is only a random hammerer - but he also does it only at 5-6 am. I want to fling open the window and shriek, "What are you, a bloody cobbler??" I could not stand it if it was a regular thing.

Have they themselves ever complained of noise at your home and they are doing this in retaliation? If not, it's very odd to be making so much noise at that time. Do they sleep during the day?

@milkyaqua "What are you, a bloody cobbler??"

This made me laugh SO much - thank you

Fascinated by the idea of hammering at 5am. Especially when they are retired - not on shift work.

Have you asked what they are doing?

Their response is... "We're aware of your medical condition and its not us"

It's also been this :

"is it the menopause?"
So unbelievably offensive, implying I'm mad. My son heard the hammering this morning.
Last year I threatened to have my solicitor and doctor involved. Their response was "we'll say the same thing to your solicitor and doctor :ITS NOT US"

I live in a semi detached. 30s crummy building.
Use ear plugs but doors slamming and hammering penetrate I'm afraid...

Why the hell I didn't record it this morning is unknown. So daft.

How elderly are these people?
Is their daughter approachable? You need to record the noise and let them hear it.

Can you not play music in the day and make noise that is acceptable in the day but would annoy the hell out of them?

Talk to the daughter if you can.

If that doesn't work, then the loud music, or perhaps record something really offensive and play on repeat.

They're clearly sleeping during the day so you HAVE to make noise so these fuckers are trained to go to bed at a normal time

Think of it like non-cute puppy training ..

Don't think I am ridiculous but is it definitely them? Years ago the council came round with a noise complaint about us sawing in the middle of the night. It was the flat next door but the way the sound travelled made it sound like us. The council did not believe us and moved the old lady to another flat.we bought a house and moved out.

Mammajay that would make sense in a terraced house, mines a semi, so it's only me and them.

At one point we were on good terms, that's when their daughter rang, I'm not in touch with her now... No number etc. I took care of their house while they were away, they did the same. It all turned sour when they had building works done five years ago and they stripped the floors and binned the carpets, did something to the chimney breast, extended, made the house echo. Refused to be mindful.

Yes agreed, in the past, the only thing that has worked for a few weeks /months is me blasting out music.

But interestingly, they're more likely to be silenced by me playing a hardcore reggae cd I picked up in the Caribbean then any of my 70s 80s rock...

They're not that elderly, late 60s? Early 70s? They're daughter, when she stays slams doors at midnight and clomps around even louder. Her two children, privately educated come to stay with gramps every single holiday and are tearing around the house in shoes, screaming at 6, so my kids never get the lie in they look forward to in school holidays... And then, lo and behold, their grandkids are totally silent from 8 am onwards. Its insane!

Maybe they can’t do it at any other time? I had to put IKEA furniture together in the early hours once and omg the neighbours were knocking on the walls, going mental. Some people need to calm down

A bit like my parents maybe, they are awake from 11am-6pm.... then start falling asleep on and off on sofas etc watching tv from like 6pm until 11pm, then they seem to get a second wind in their day and start doing all kinds of unsuitable jobs, diy, hoovering, from 11pm until they finally quit about 2-3am. When I stay over with them it is bizarre and I find it really awful as I usually go to be 10-11 when they are just starting to start up!!

i would try the council, they've helped me with a building noise problem

if you have to resort to knocking on the neighbour's door at night, you could get a panic alarm, take the pin out, throw it in their hall, walk away.

i haven't had to resort to this but I nearly did with someone down the hall. i do already own this cheap panic alarm though! When I reported them to the mgmt company, I told them I was thinking to do this and they said "it would be understandable". The other neighbours said the same!

I'm not surprised they went mad.

We have a similar age neighbour driving us mad too. All seems to have started because we weren't happy he's been letting tradesmen onto our property for days on end without actually asking us if it's ok that they can trash the garden and do whatever the hell they want. We haven't spoken to him about it but ever since, he's been an utter knobhead. I assume the dodgy tradesmen gave him their version of events which was probably bullshit.

We've had to report him for burning plastics several times at the side of our house which filled the house with toxic smoke and our newborn was struggling to breathe properly. His response was 'And?' then 'You can't dictate to me what I do'.
Ever since he had the letter from the council warning him, he's been blasting his tv loud enough to make almost every room in our house unusable. It's unbearable especially as we moved here because we had a noisy neighbour who used to blast dance music until 4am.
I don't think we have any choice but to report him for noise issues. I'd definitely advise you do the same, OP.

Trying to break this one down.

you got on well.

then they ripped up carpets and everyday noise became an issue.

I assume you complained?

they ignored?

so you started blasting music during the day.

they retaliated with night time noise.

and so began a vicious circle.

how about mediation? There do seem to be faults in both asides here. The early noise was doors slamming and footsteps. That happened in semis.

in my last house I heard everything. Next door had bare floorboards. I could hear the man of the house peeing. It was so much worse at night - every foot step, every conversation, every intimate sound😩.

so you started blasting music during the day.
they retaliated with night time noise.
and so began a vicious circle.

I think you've missed many key facts.

One being these are older people, whose sleep cycles seem to have moved markedly forward as can sometimes happen with older people, who are busily up and about - and doing noisy chores - at 3, 4, 5 am.

This is not retaliation. This is their way of life.