DH Drunken Shenanigans

[SleepyDibill0]

Hi everyone! Just need to went really as feeling quite peed off with DH... Long story short, DH went out with his mates last night for 'a few beers'. Fast forward to midnight, comes home and goes bed. Half hour later I wake up to the sound of puking so go to check on him. There's vomit all over upstairs landing carpet, walls, bathroom floor, door, side of the bath, toilet etc. You get the idea! Spent around an hour cleaning it up so DD aged 3 don't step in it in the morning. DH went back to sleep only to then throw up down the side of fabric divan bed onto the carpet (missed the bucket and towel I've put down for him). Had a horrible sleep as spent ages cleaning up sick and tending to DS who is a couple of months old. When DH wakes up I bet he will argue it's 'his weekend and that he should be allowed to do whatever he wants'. I'm on mat leave so such thing as a weekend doesn't really exist for me and now he will be useless all day. Also the money is tight at the moment and he spent quite a lot on drinks from what I can see meanwhile I have been going without many things as I can't justify spending money we don't have. AIBU to be peed off? Feel like going out shopping for the day and leaving him with the kids to clean up the remaining mess... 😤

Has he woken up yet? If not wake him up

Go out today and leave him with the kids and the mess to clean up. That is not on.

That's disgusting. Unless he was grovelling on the floor with apologies I would walk out.

Maybe you should take a shit inside one of his shoes before you go.

Go out. Tell him you need time to cool off and disappear.

Well, it's one thing going out and having a great time. It's quite another going out and vomiting everywhere. And yet another thing if he's shitty with you about it.

Does he have form for this?

He should be on his knees apologising to you foe this disgusting behaviour.
I would 100% take myself off and leave him to clean up his own mess and mi d the children.

"his weekend and that he should be allowed to do whatever he wants"

That's fine, if what he wants is to clear up vomit throughout the night and next day.

It's also your weekend, and it's not what you want.

Honestly if he wasn't apologetic and working hard to put it right, I'd finish it. Nothing will change.

How regular is this?

The vomit is vile and ridiculous but my reaction would depend on whether I’ve had to clean up after him before.

@toomuchlaundry still asleep but I don't want to wake him as I feel like I will lose it and don't want the DC to see it... Been up since 5am with the baby stewing in anger 😂
@Lwoj thank you! With his half arsed efforts of cleaning I would be finding bits weeks down the line...
@GrandRapids your comment about the shoes made me laugh!

I would be so beyond livid that I would genuinely leave him. DH only did this once, 10 years ago when we first got together. He's never done it since as he knows I won't stand for it

I grew up in a household with an alcoholic father and an enabling mother, I won't subject my DC to the same

Get your dc to jump on DH and ask to play. Then make some really smelly breakfast and put some music on loud. ...and go out.

How often does this happen?

You absolutely should be really, really angry about this. You don't need to shout or lose your rag but make it absolutely crystal clear that you expect him to clean up properly and never do this again.

Please expect and demand better from your husband and children's father. It's not OK.

It's definitely not a regular occurrence although as and when he does go out he always says one thing but then does completely different due to FOMO. Just feeling cross as I rarely see him during the week due to the nature of his job and we only get to see each other on the weekends. I feel like the weekend has been spoiled to say the least 🙄

Why are you leaving him to sleep? Why did you spend all night cleaning? Is this a first?

Bizarre how many grown men get themselves in such a state after a night out.

@polkadotpixie I did too! And DH knows this and that I'm not the biggest fan of drinking because it reminds me of some very bad childhood experiences. I don't mind him having a good time, but there's one thing having some drinks with your mates and another puking your guts out!

Wake him.
Tell him to Google "how to clean vomit out of carpet"
Go out with kids.

Repeat until carpet etc is properly clean

That is totally unacceptable. I wouldn't have cleaned it up, I'd have slept in with my dc and got them up and out first thing in the morning, without using the bathroom, and left him with his filth to sort himself.

I'm not sure I'd want to live with someone who gets so drunk he vomits, let alone someone who gets so drunk he vomits all over the house.

Actually I am sure. I wouldn't.

It is absolutely reasonable to be furious!

My DP did this once (he was only sick in the bathroom, not the whole house, but there was a lot of cleaning up to do…) and I was absolutely raging about it. He was, however, incredibly apologetic the next day and it never happened again.

If he hadn’t cared and it had been a regular thing I couldn’t have lived with it. I don’t mind people getting a bit drunk now and again - god knows I’ve done it myself enough times! - but I couldn’t handle someone thinking it was somehow OK to get so hammered that they were sick all over the place.

I would absolutely lose my reason. Even reading that gave me anxiety. Ridiculous a grown man getting into that state. You poor thing OP. That’s horrific.

I think he's gone too far. DP went out with friends when our first was around the same age as your baby, I actually think that was the last time too, we rarely go on nights out. 🙈 He got a taxi home, went to bed and woke up feeling a little worse for wear in the morning, but it was nothing unexpected and he was still able to get up and go about his day. I had no problem being quiet when I was up first with baby, then.
In your situation, I'd be genuinely angry, and would be going about my morning as noisily as I liked, cooked breakfast for him to smell, the lot. Although I wouldn't go out and leave DC with him if he wasn't in a fit state to watch them properly, especially a 2 month old.

He was so drunk he couldn't even tell he had sick all over his feet. Tried going off to get back into bed before I pointed this out to him! Literally cleaned his feet so that he doesn't smear it all over the bed... Not that it mattered anyway seeing as he then was sick in the bed 😩

Actually I’ve a different view and that’s I’d be deeply concerned if someone was this sick. If you are not exaggerating it then that amount of vomit everywhere is a sign of being very Il..

you have written he vomited in the hall, down the hall walls, in the toilet, over the bath, on the bathroom floor, on thr bathroom walls, on his shoes, down the bed.

that’s beyond extreme it really is.