Doubts about taking this dog!?!?!

[Mum2One23]

So due to collect a puppy in 2 days time and after months/years of research and waiting for the right time (we didn’t have a garden up until recently and didn’t feel it was fair to the dog) I am now getting VERY cold feet…

I’m starting to really worry about if I will cope with the demands of a young dog, what will happen if I don’t and have to get rid of it (?) and whether it’s worth turning my whole life upside down (finally at the stage where children are old enough to get some peace and quiet)…

Is this normal? Is it worth it?

I really didn’t expect to feel like this!

100% puppy farm. Good breeders would not offer two dogs.

Sounds like a puppy farm. Have you visited? Seen pups with mum?

Don't do it, I got one and regretted it. A week of torture before he went back to the breeder. I definitely got the puppy blues. Felt sick with anxiety all the time thinking what the fuck have I done?! Felt like a huge weight had been lifted once he'd gone. I could actually relax in my own home and not have to watch 24/7 whether he needed a shit/wee. Absolutely nightmare. Almost worth losing over £1k to realise how good my life was before! (Not quite though, still pissed off with breeder)

@SleepyDoggo honestly I 100% agree, yet they appeared on the surface to be so reputable!

do I stand a chance of getting my money back?!

poor puppy, even when I expressed my feelings that I did not want to take this dog on, the breeder pretty much said take the dog or lose your money - didn’t give 2 hoots as to where the dog goes, actually makes me feel sorry for the dog and want to take it just to get it away from him!!

I wouldn’t unless you’re 100% sure. I found having a puppy very like the newborn stage. But a needy hyperactive newborn who could get everywhere, wee and poo everywhere and chew everything in sight 🙊.
I love her to bits now and she’s amazing, but the first 18 months were HARD.

Who is the breeder and how did you find them?

The worst mistake about getting a dog is choosing the wrong breed for your lifestyle.

I meet many people and dogs in this situation and both dog and owners are miserable.

@Festivecheer26 I have the full name etc of breeder and found them on a website for that specific breed which is why I thought they were reputable

The breeder doesn't sound very reputable. A genuine breeder (if there is such a thing) would give you your money back and concentrate on finding the new pup a home.

Aside from that, if you're not 100% excited and all in ready to go with a pup then you shouldn't get one. I've never been hesitant for a second with the few pups I've had in my life & I've also never had the puppy blues people speak of. I think they're signs you're either not ready for a pup or don't want it as much as you should IYKWIM.

Have you visited the pups? How did you pay, any chance of contacting your bank to block/ recover the payment?

Don't do it. They are a bind, a chore, and very hard work. Not worth it. Plus the expense. Be free.

Sunk cost fallacy. Even if you lose your money, you're saving yourself from 15 odd years of massive expense.

Dont do it.That breeder sounds completely unethical and I would not trust them to have bred for quality pups.
If you think of a puppy like having a young toddler around for next 10 years or so,with perhaps even more limitations such as when you want weekends away or holidays,do you really want this lifestyle?
It really has to be something you love doing,the good bits and the not so good.
I strongly advise you to not go with this breeder though,whatever you decide.Losing a deposit is nothing compared to the thousands of pounds in vet bills from a sick puppy.
Good luck whatever you decide.

Are they based in Bristol by any chance?

So I think I may have succeeded in getting my money back (🤞🤞🤞) gave them an ultimatum which involved them either handing over the dog for purely the deposit money and I would find the dog a good home or give me back my money I had paid… throw around a few fancy legal words (thank you law degree that I haven’t used in yonks) and I think I’ve got him to buckle 🤞 told him exactly what I thought of him as a so called breeder too! Poor bloody dogs!

Like other posters I think if you take a dog thinking you can 'get rid' if things don't work out, that's a bad sign. Taking on a puppy should be similar to having a child, a lifelong commitment, it's a living, emotional, creature not an 'it'.

BUT at the same time this breeder sounds dodgy. You should usually visit the puppy in their home environment before buying and meet the parents - the mother at the very least. I'm assuming this didn't happen? It allows breeder to check you out - as they don't want puppies returned or to go to wrong kind of home - and for you to check out that everything's okay at their end.

Also it's weird that a supposedly-responsible breeder is urging you to take two puppies at once. It's not recommended, especially for inexperienced dog owners, as makes it much harder to train them, they bond with each other not with you. The standard advice, if you've not very experienced, is to take one puppy then wait about two years before taking on another dog/puppy. Statistics show large numbers of dog owners abandon or attempt to rehome their dog before they're two. If you get through those two years which are the hardest in terms of training, terrible teens etc then you're more likely to do well with a second.

Report the breeder. If he’s unlicensed or not meeting welfare needs the local authority, rspca or police can act. I volunteer in a dog rescue and we hate these bastards.

I grew up with dogs and love them. We moved countries in the summer and because I can't work at the moment I said would get a dog for DS. We found a place that let us take one for a two week trial - we ended up sending him back. I barley slept and he wrecked the house (we live in furnished accommodation as well) , bit both me and my husband and was generally a PITA. We are just at the stage where our kids are getting some independence (DS is hard work at 10 still but that's another thread) and we like to travel. Really not ideal for us so we sent him back and I'm so very glad we did.
We've got two cats so when we do go anywhere our neighbours and / or cleaner just pop in to fuss them every day and feed them etc

The breeder sounds incredibly dodgy.

I understand taking a non refundable deposit to avoid time wasters and such, but the way they were talking to you just doesn’t sound right.

We very recently picked up our pup and they couldn’t have been more accommodating and helpful. We were able to meet both mum and dad, we were able to visit as often as we liked (we went twice before picking her up), sent us photos and videos every few days of the pups, they asked about our lifestyle/home/garden etc, and we’ve been in communication after getting the pup too and made it very clear if there’s anything they can help us with from now on, just to drop them a message. They were also very open with us about turning down a few people who were interested in the pups because they were straight away asking genetic based questions (colouring genes etc) which is obviously for backyard breeding and they said no money was worth it. They wanted them to go to family homes.

I think you’ve had a lucky escape as hard as it is because you feel bad for the pups that are left with them. Take the rest of the year to reconsider whether a puppy is right for you and then see what you think. Even a different breed might be a better option if you have doubts. For us there’s always one of us at home (shift work/I work part time anyway) but we don’t have the time to do multiple big walks every day, so went with a breed that doesn’t need a huge amount of exercise and is small. If we’d picked a different breed (eg a Collie or another high demand breed) instead I definitely would have had doubts beforehand because I would have known our lifestyle would have had to change to an unrealistic level to adapt to the dog.

If you've paid for the dog then she'd be comitting theft surely if she wont give your money back?

You need to pull out now, it definitely isn’t normal to have these thoughts. I have had nothing but excitement before collecting a new cat or dog. The thought of rehoming has never occurred, it is cruel to get a dog when you are already even contemplating that. Please please do this dog a favour.

If there’s any doubt at all then don’t get the dog

Considering at this point that you may Get rid of it as though the pup is an unwanted piece of garden furniture....do the poor puppy a favour and back out now.

Don't get a dog . Even saying the words ' get rid of ' wound not have come from a genuine animal lover ever .
They are not disposable and are with you a long time .

I wish I hadn't got my puppy 6 years ago. We love him and would never part with him but he has an ongoing skin condition that costs a fortune in meds as we are past the condition limit on his pet insurance. My teenage dcs don't like taking him for walks any more, he costs a fortune to groom and we can't go anywhere without paying for him to be looked after. Like I said we will have him until he dies as we could never part with him but if I could turn back the clock and not have got him well....I would