To be sick of "Crap Attempt At Neutrality" threads?

[WeBuiltCisCityOnSexistRoles]

Admittedly I am a right grump atm, but this is really irritating me now.

Fucking Person A and Person B. Fucking I'm not saying which one I am as I want it to be impartial. Fucking let's call them Sarah and Paul.

Fuck OFF. It's usually glaringly obvious which one the OP is, or it's too vague (usually with a big drip feed later) to even tell what's actually going on. You can't present a neutral scenario because you aren't bloody neutral. You're posting in AIBU - am I being unreasonable? If you want to know if you are BU - just explain properly! Just say who you are and what's going on - if you are Person A you won't even have a full insight into Person B's mindset anyway.

I think these posters should be banned for life also obvious reverse thread posters. Off you fuck. Go to Netmums or somewhere.

AIBU to feel this way?

But why ask us at all if you don't find the answers helpful/useful/relevant?

Besides, obfuscation makes harder for us to judge the situation and where the biases might be.

Always cycling! But there have been at least twenty pages before where it's been coyly referred to as DH's hobby.

"Let's call them..." always makes me move on to another thread.

Me too. I know I won't be able to muster up the necessary outrage to serve the OP's desire for collective drama.

My most hated 'crap attempt at neutrality' threads are one where the op clearly has an opinion but caveats it with "I understand it must be difficult/challenging/a struggle but...".

For example:

OP: "We went to a cafe and there was a child making lots of noise. Parents didn't engage and let child stare at his iPad instead. I would understand if the dc had special needs but he didn't (because I have special diagnosis eyes).

And the drip feed: "I have a nephew with special needs and his parents bring a range of organic fruits and Suduko to keep him entertained. They simply won't accept bad behaviour."

OMG yes! I hate them too. It’s so bloody obvious who’s who. If I’m feeling a bit contrary I just say ‘so I guess you’re Sarah then?’ before I give my reply 😆

I actually find the ones where they’ve change the names really hard to follow. I wish the OP would just change the name without announcing it and say their AIBU. For some reason I’m always thinking ‘right who’s Sarah etc’ whereas if I didn’t know it was a name change I reckon I’d be ok 🤷‍♀️ It’s not going to be outing to any of the OP’s
mates if she hasn’t got any mates called Sarah and Paul.

No, but if you know a Sarah and Paul, you might wrongly think it's them.

Those OPs should just start or end by saying all names are changed. I can follow Sarah, Paul and Jenny but I find Person A, Person B and Person C (or A, B and C) clunky, confusing and annoying.

Is there any room on your ban list for reverses which irritate the hell out of me? Oh and drip feeders who, when the thread isn't going their way, post more and more unlikely addons to their story?

Oh fuck, reverses. I hate those so much. They're completely dishonest because they assume that OP knows the other person's thought process. (That's also why they're so obvious...even if the other person is wrong, they aren't going to be such a one dimensional pantomime villain over it.)

If you want to know what we'd think if they asked us, get them to ask us. If that's not an option, give us the only story you can give: yours. It'll be no more biased than a reverse but at least we can honestly analyse what the biases are and why you feel as you do.

After all, would you trust the other person to give your side for you?

Oh Jesus, drip feeds drive me insane!

OP: My husband called me a grumpy toad because I wouldn't eat the meal he made for me. AIBU?

Every Poster: Yes YABU and ungrateful

OP: This is after he broke my jaw and my nose.

Every Poster: Why didn't you mention this before?

OP: That's not what I want to talk about. I knew MN is terrible but you are all awful. Flounce....

As soon as I see “let’s call them…” I close the thread.