Friendly Reminder

[Magenta82]

Why are all reminders suddenly friendly?
The family centre sent me a friendly reminder about my appointment to weigh DD1, Boots emailed me a friendly reminder about some offers they sent that are about to expire.
To be honest it comes across as almost threatening, as in they are being friendly now but might not be another time...

I often wonder the same!

do they think if they don’t put ‘friendly’ it will be a violent reminder? Or a rude reminder? 😂

I feel patronised when I get one of those.

I get gentle reminders via email at work.
They're particularly nasty those 😏

Yes to all of these!

Ah yes the Gentle Reminder at work .......

But one of our managers used to like leaving little messages on Post It Notes you can imagine where I wanted to put them !

Another one is "I hate to say this but..."
When they really mean "I'm loving saying this.."

Another one is 'not mandatory but very much encouraged'

I. E. Almost frogmarched, really

Microaggression (the email, not your post!)

Yes I hate the gentle reminders!

Can I also add Polite Notices as in ‘Polite Notice, do not park here’.

I agree. Patronising in the extreme

It’s nicer than forwarding last reminder with a 🚩

Much like passive-aggressive messages stuck on walls and headed "polite notice".

We get the odd ‘gentle reminder’ at work. It’s because people take offence at getting straightforward/firm reminders.

Do you work for Jacob Rees Mogg?

'Next' send you a 'quick reminder' by text to pay your statement.

They're not even kidding either!

SO fucking quick is this reminder text, that it's there in your in box when you wake up at 6am...alongside the EMAILED STATEMENT that was sent around 2am! 🤣🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️

That's more than passively aggressive 'reminding'...that's bordering on actual bullying 🤣

A lot of people at work moan that English people sugar coat everything, we never just say "no" it has to be "I'm sorry that's not possible right now" etc, the rise of gentle and friendly reminders is making me feel we are getting worse!

Help, I use 'gentle reminders'. What else can I say ?

Friendly reminders are usually code for "I'm about to lose my shit over this"

'Polite Notice' is very smug. It isn't polite to point out what you think is your own politeness..

Also see 'courtesy call'. How courteous are they really?

Just reminder. Drop the gentle etc. The tone of the message will convey a lot more about whether you are being gentle, friendly, angry, passive aggressive or not.

I honestly am not passive aggressive. It's sent a week before I need a response. Once deadline has passed I just say I need the stuff and please send.

No hidden meanings but this thread has made me think about how it could be perceived.

Oh, Y definitely ANBU! When someone puts ‘friendly reminder’ as a precursor, it’s nearly always because they know they need to soften the tone of what is going to be a moan / instruction / unpleasant reminder etc.

There are many friendly reminders to do things such as ‘keep the noise down’ and to remind you that ‘your payment is now due’ but never to do anything pleasant.

The ‘friendly’ bit makes me brace a bit, just like when someone says ‘don’t take this the wrong way but…’ or ‘I’m not being funny but…’ because we all know what’s coming isn’t friendly.

I think gentle, friendly etc are nice. They are obviously well intentioned.

"Hi all, I'm emailing to remind you that I need the widget reports by the end of the week. Thanks"

"Hi all, here is a gentle reminder that I need the widget reports by the end of the week. Thanks"

I don't think most people are being passive aggressive when they soften the message, but it can come across like that. To me the first message sounds more straightforward and less annoying.