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AIBU?

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Original poster

Inheritance split - how to split when siblings have different numbers of children

447 replies

Benja1405 · 08/06/2022 15:22

Divorced parent died - two married sons in will, one has 3 children and one has 2. What do you feel is the fairest way for the estate to be split? Lawyer thought straight 50/50 between the two sons. Son with 3 children thinks 55/45 in his favour is fairer as he has more children. AIBU to think that this is unfair on the other son? Just interested in views, thanks.

OP posts:
SmartCarDriver · 09/06/2022 18:47

HMG107 · 09/06/2022 17:09

@Blossomtoes @PurpleDaisies @SirChenjins @Johnnysgirl @Itloggedmeoutagain @SmartCarDriver @MrsTerryPratchett

It would have been amazing if they had suggested we all had an equal share but unfortunately they have no interest in my well-being.

In the days after the death I was asked to give 100% of my inheritance to sibling 2 as the other sibling and my remaining parent wanted her to live rent/mortgage free. Sibling 3 lives rent free with the remaining parent, they have no plans to move out and the remaining parent has already stated that sibling 3 will inherit their house. I am financially responsible for a mortgage (22 years left on the term) and a child.

I actually agreed to giving away all of my inheritance as I didn't want to argue over money and am used to them behaving appallingly. It was only after two more weeks of suggestions where I gave away most of my inheritance that I finally suggested the 4 blood relatives are the only ones who are included with 90% going to the siblings and 10% to the grandchild. I wouldn't have received more than my siblings, the money wouldn't have been my daughter's. However, even though they behave atrociously there is the expectation that I will be burdened with sorting out the final siblings funeral and clearing where they live. When I was gifting my inheritance to sibling 2 she let slip that if she was to die I wasn't going to be included in her will so it's all take from them with no give.

I think this is the point where I walk away for good.

Well your circumstances are somewhat different. So not really relevant, without explanation.

Mumontour85 · 09/06/2022 18:48

My parents have split evenly between my sisters and I, and has separate trust funds in place for my kids. (I'm the only one with any) that can't be touched until they turn a certain age....

Thisisconfusing · 09/06/2022 18:50

50:50 for each of the siblings Just because one has more kids isn’t relevant

Mommabear20 · 09/06/2022 18:52

DH and I have (soon to be 3) kids, his older sister has 2, his younger brother has 3 and his older brother has none. I wouldn't expect us to get more than his older brother just because we chose to have kids and he didn't.
If leaving to the kids it should be equal split between them. If leaving it to his kids and grandkids then it gets more complicated

Seahorsemama · 09/06/2022 18:54

50:50 split for sure

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 09/06/2022 18:55

Inheritance is to the sons, not the grandchildren. So 50/50.

SausageAndCash · 09/06/2022 18:57

The OP has vanished.
There was no decision to be made:
The will was already written.
The father is already dead.
It was left 45/55

THE MOST TIME WASTING THREAD BY AN OP EVER ,

Snugglemonkey · 09/06/2022 18:57

50/50

LondonJax · 09/06/2022 18:58

50/50. What if brother with 2 kids has more children in the future? Is he going to 'demand' his other percentage to equal it up?

And what would they plan to do with this money that impacts the grandchildren? If they're planning to put some away for the grandchildren then, if you're talking about fair, shouldn't the brothers current finances be taken into consideration? So if brother 1 lives in a five bed house and brother 2 is in a three bed flat should brother 2 get more? How far do you take 'fairness'.

They should do what the will says and be grateful for the help the money will give them.

ElCaMum · 09/06/2022 18:59

Totally should be 50/50 unless the will states otherwise.

My Nan tried to write a will that split the money between the grandchildren, bypassing her children but the eldest kicked up a storm because my Mum had the audacity to have 4 children to her 1. She died with no will and the money got split equally between her children, none of the grandchildren saw any of it.

If there's no will that states otherwise there is no reason to give more to one sibling over another just because they have more children.

Inheritance always brings out the worst in people, unfortunately.

Gingernan · 09/06/2022 19:01

50/50. My father in law left all the grand children £1000 each and shared the rest between his son and daughter and myself,his other son's widow. Wonderfully kind! We all had young children so of course, they all benefitted.

WTAFhappened123 · 09/06/2022 19:01

If it’s going to kids then amount split equally by each kid and put in trust

Johnnysgirl · 09/06/2022 19:05

Gingernan · 09/06/2022 19:01

50/50. My father in law left all the grand children £1000 each and shared the rest between his son and daughter and myself,his other son's widow. Wonderfully kind! We all had young children so of course, they all benefitted.

What a gent Smile

Chuck2015 · 09/06/2022 19:06

Absolutely 50/50, my brother has no children and I’d never dream of taking an extra share in this scenario.

WhatsInAMolatovMocktail · 09/06/2022 19:13

50/50 without question

Barney60 · 09/06/2022 19:17

We did 50/50 to direct children, up to us what we gave our kids, thats only fair in my opinion.

Mamarama2u2 · 09/06/2022 19:31

I have a sibling who has 2 children, I have 3 children. I would never expect to receive a higher split because I have more children. That’s irrelevant 🤷🏻‍♀️ You are definitely not being unreasonable!

Londonderry34 · 09/06/2022 19:31

Well by that logic if you had no children you would have nothing in the will? What is it with parents and families who can't be fair? It's not hard.

Original poster
Benja1405 · 09/06/2022 19:35

SausageAndCash · 09/06/2022 18:57

The OP has vanished.
There was no decision to be made:
The will was already written.
The father is already dead.
It was left 45/55

THE MOST TIME WASTING THREAD BY AN OP EVER ,

Blimey who rattled your cage. No-one forced you to read the whole thread. I thought that was what this site is for, asking for thoughts and opinions 🙄😆

OP posts:
TrixieMixie · 09/06/2022 19:38

Straight 50 50. Not relevant how many children they have! What if one had been tragically infertile, do they deserve to be punished by getting nothing??? Go with the will. Person asking for more on grounds of more kids is just a CF.

JulesJules · 09/06/2022 19:39

50/50 obviously.

Number of children is irrelevant.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 09/06/2022 19:41

I'm one of three.

One has three children, one two and one has none.

It's an equal three way split.

gimmepeaceandsky · 09/06/2022 19:46

If split for the sons 50/50 which is fairer….
if to the children then between the children, but still would be under the parent responsibility until they are about adult age, which will sound unfair for the son that decided to have only 2 children :(

gimmepeaceandsky · 09/06/2022 19:47

TrixieMixie · 09/06/2022 19:38

Straight 50 50. Not relevant how many children they have! What if one had been tragically infertile, do they deserve to be punished by getting nothing??? Go with the will. Person asking for more on grounds of more kids is just a CF.

Absolutely !

KJCB1210 · 09/06/2022 19:48

50/50 for sure

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