Mum jumping out and scaring me as a child.

[1000yellowdaisies]

Perhaps not an AIBU but its so strange i really don't know where to post...
So I am now 36 so born mid 80s and I've just had a flash back to something strange my mum used to do.

From as early as i can remember she used to do this thing of 'giving me a good shock' so jumping out from somewhere or doing something else that would startle me greatly. She wasnt doing this to be mean or fun she used to say that a 'good fright gets your blood circulating' and its good for your heart or something like that. Anyway she seemed to believe it had physical benefits for your body to have a scare every now and then....
She did it for years when I'd least expect it but then it tailed off.
Mum was and is kind and loving, we are very close and she looks after my DC regularly. She is not mean.

But I've suddenly remembered this thing and wanted to ask her about it. Not because I'm traumatised, I am not, I'm just so curious! But then again what is the point after all this time and maybe it would embarrass her to be reminded of it.
Was this a thing that was believed at the time??
Just to say my mum was an older mum (41) when she had me which felt unusual in the 80s... she was also not raised by her parents but by elderly relatives (who were born in the late 1890s) so she did have lots of old fashioned views when i was growing up (didn't get a microwave for many years as dangerous and also couldn't drive near electricity pylons in the rain in case in case of electrocution).
Has anyone else ever heard of this as a thing?

Don’t k on about it won’t good for you but my sister used to do this all the time.

Now as an adult I never jump when someone tries to scare me or if something falls over. It drives DS mad as he used to try to give me a scare when he was little.

I don't know about because it gets your blood going but I can see how it 'makes sense' and how she could believe it.
I would ask her, then tell us what she said! it is curious

Just to add, everyone in our family does this too, we always do it, children and adults, for fun

No I don’t think it was a thing- never heard of this. She sounds quite eccentric and misguided.

I've never heard of that. It pisses me off when people do it to me, I don't like the 'nearly having a heart attack' feeling.

No I’ve never heard of this, it sounds completely bizarre.
Did she enjoy you being frightened? Or did she genuinely think it was good for your health in some misguided way.

I would ask her about it - if it was just an odd misguided thing rather than emotional abuse then there shouldn’t be any issues talking about it surely?

Yeah my parents did it to me.. I did it back it became a game.. although I don't do it with my kids they love to sneak into a room and go raahhh lol I just see it as a bit of fun tbh made each other jump and laugh .. I can see though that it's not fun in everyone's eyes but if it is seen that way there's no harm

🤔

We just did it as fun and for a laugh.
I think with microwave the rumours were quite strong back then.

Yes, there has been research published about this. The theory is human physiology requires regular short frights to keep working to the optimum. It is supposed to be what is behind the ‘shock seeking’ behaviour many people exhibit, such as through watching horror films etc. In previous millennia, normal life would have been much more frightening m, and humans evolved in a situation in which frights and shocks would have been a natural and regular occurrence

I’m similar age to you and never heard of that.

She sounds a bit weird 😬

Oh my goodness! So there was actually some logic behind it!

Ask her! It wouldn't be weird to bring it up.
I love these old fashioned beliefs.

^ oops. Or indeed contemporary scientifically backed beliefs

Exactly. What was your mums reaction after she scared you? How old was you?

It's cruel.

I hate this and have trained my kids not to do this!

I remember my dad hiding behind a tree and jumping out at us, on a family walk, because we’d done the same to him, several times, on the same walk!

I was inconsolable. And still remember it to this day! Sadly, he’s not still with us, but would be so upset to know how much his prank affected 6yo me! There’s something about the element of surprise/shock that’s unsettling to a little one. (I made a mental note to never do the same to my DD)

It wasnt cruel and shes not weird as another poster said.... i may not have explained it very well.... she said it was good for me. My mum is ace it wasnt about being cruel to me ....

We are so lucky now we can just look things up easily and then dismiss them, but back then I suppose it might have taken years to find out that things were not true.
my parents believed that if you laughed too much, you could have a convulsion and stopped us laughing if we were laughing too much!! They actually still believe that one !

I did ring my dad once after getting an electric shock and he said ‘oh I bet you feel great after it do you?’ So maybe there was a belief that a good shock makes you feel more alive.

I remember my dad doing the same only with a huge dead fish in his hands or crab claws on his fingers. He was an abusive arsehole though

Yep sorry I think this is cruel, once fair enough but regularly I'd be very nervous around someone like this.

Why don’t you just ask her instead of lots of people that don’t her or the answer?

@1000yellowdaisies the act is cruel. Look up the defination OP.

I once had DS on a changing mat as a baby and I went in the cupboard to get his things out and made he jump by mistake. He flinched and cried. I felt horrendous. It was a pure accident the point is though to deliberately distress your own child is CRUEL. You didn't answer the question did it make you feel uncomfortable?

The act itself is cruel and odd.

Saying it was good for you is even worse. Its warped.

Strange is all relative perhaps you don't think it was odd but it is to me and others

It's very like the current popular theory that cold water immersion shocks you into coping better with anxiety. And "safe" scariness is such a feature in children's play it surely must have developmental benefits. Not about making babies cry but making older kids shriek then laugh is very common indeed.

I hate this so so much. I have made DH promise me he will never hide or jump out at me as long as we both shall live... He did it one time and NEVER again.