To be angry at boyfriend?

[godsavethegin]

Thursday I went away with my boyfriend to Liverpool.
It was meant to be a romantic weekend away.
Anyway we were sat outside in Liverpool in a pub beer garden enjoying the sunshine.
A few guys sat next to us on the table as it was busy.
Then a few more joined the table.
He was chatting away to them and we stayed there with them for 5 hours.
I asked could we have 1 more drink with them then do our own thing ...he said we are all having fun (I wasn't )
Then we went to a nightclub with them.
I wasn't happy.
He kept saying "what's wrong?"
"You not having fun?"

We got back to the hotel about 1am and I wasn't happy and we ended up arguing.
Was I wrong ?
Aibu ?
I explained my point of view and he's response
"I was relaxed and having fun,we were together what's the issues "

Why did you just passively go along with it? It was shit, he's a knob.

Yanbu to be cross with your DP
He ignored the plan you both made for a romantic weekend away together to instead chat all night to random men that were out, effectively turning your weekend into a boys night out, but with you there and becoming increasingly fed up of these intruding strangers.

He sounds selfish & inconsiderate

He doesn't care about whether you were having fun nor that you gave up your time and money for a romantic weekend with him that he ruined by letting others glom onto you and take over your night out.

And he thinks you would have ruined HIS weekend by saying you didn't want this because HE was "relaxed and having fun"?!

Doesn't sound like he even cares about your views and enjoyment at all.

I suspect he is like this in other areas of your life. It's "the DP show" isn't it?

When he said don't ruin the weekend, he obviously meant don't ruin it for me, because he was enjoying himself even if you weren't. I'd be concerned that he priorities his enjoyment over yours and tries to guilt you into accepting what he wants to do.

Honestly OP I had an ex like this, the first sniff of company other than mine, when we were out and he would come alive. I always felt that me on my own was never enough for him and I ended it.

At the root of it was that he loved socialising whenever the opportunity arose whereas I was happy with it in smaller doses, I don't need to go out all the time. It became exhausting in the end. I swear even a funeral used to perk him up, as he could see a few drinks and a party afterwards!

He's a dickhead.

I get that he's one of those ultra-sociable people who will strike up conversation with anyone, and that's what he enjoys. Some people are like that. Fair enough. But he is being incredibly selfish to expect you to be the same. You're secondary, basically. He's the centre of his own universe and he's just dragging you along for the ride.

However, you say he is 'always doing this' and you've been together four years?! Why on earth have you been putting up with this for all this time? Haven't you told him that you absolutely HATE being dragged off for hours of drinking with randoms?!

If he wants to befriend strangers, that's up to him, but he doesn't have to do it when he's with you.

Does he only do this when he's drinking, by the way? I ask because my ex was a bit like that. Once he'd sat down and had a drink, that was pretty much it. He would basically refuse to do anything else for the rest of the day, regardless of what was planned. That's one of the many reasons I dumped him.

Oh God I had one of these when I was in my late 20s OP. Our first ever weekend away was spent with a load of randoms we bumped into and got chatting to. I'm definitely a pub person and will happily have a laugh with someone I don't particularly know, but this ended up being all day.

I thought "fair enough we've got another day or so to ourselves" then I heard him arranging to meet some of them the next day without even asking me. I made it clear I wasn't happy but to be honest I should have taken more heed, instead of wasting another 5 years on the relationship. People in the pub were always prioritised in favour of me, and looking back I tried to be the 'cool girlfriend' out all the time with him. In reality sometimes I just wanted a quiet time at home without being nagged to go out. I also had people turn up with him (no warning / request) after the pub closed to carry on drinking. I know we've only had a snapshot of your relationship, but unless you're on the same page with this type of thing it will breed upset and resentment over time. IMO Johnny big bollocks chatting to all and sundry / being the life and soul are often fucking twats.

Gosh a large number of PPs have said same thing all in support of you OP

In summary- it's disappointingly evident that your DP doesn't care what you want or what you think.

He wants to do what he wants to do, even if you aren't enjoying yourself.

As you dared to express a view, DP then claimed you were ruining his weekend?!! Erm that romantic weekend away for the two of you apparently wasn't about you at all, it was all about DP!!

(..... I mean how dare you have feelings, wants or views yourself 🙃 (/s).... when your boyfriend as a man with his menz feelz is clearly far more important (/s)?!! )

What a misogynist your DP is!!!

You both had different expectations of the weekend.

Did you get to spend any quality time just the two of you at all over the weekend?

I don’t think he sounds terrible, some people are just like that and would automatically think the more the merrier if they were out for a drink on a weekend. It doesn’t mean they don’t love or respect those closest to them.

This reminds me of my ex. Every holiday, weekend away, trip it would be the same.
He needed new prey so he could spout about HIMSELF.
Every date night (even the rare ones after kids) we would go for a hurried meal (so he would feel like he'd done his "bit") then.....miraculously his mates would be on the next bar.
It Will not change OP