AIBU to want multiple pregnancy scans?

[Pregnantpolly]

AIBU to decide to have a pregnancy scan every 4 or 5 weeks in 2nd half of pregnancy?

I'm a super anxious person and know the scan only shows you what's happening that day but I also have an anterior placenta so less likely to feel movement.

I have no more NHS scans so I'll foot the bill and have private ones. I'm not expecting DH to take time off work.

It's costly and the money can be better used preparing for baby. The money would be coming out of my account not the shared account. I don't buy clothes/bags/shoes or spend lavishly in general.

There's no studies showing ultrasounds contribute to defects or harm baby. I just think I'm being unreasonably and crazy now and want confirmation either way!

Would that be enough for you or would it escalate to needing to be every 2 weeks? It is your pregnancy so you do what you need.

I personally think the time and money would be spent better addressing the root causes of your anxiety. If you’re this worried about being pregnant, you might find that the hormones etc hugely contribute to being even more anxious when the baby is actually here.

Scans won’t harm your baby but they also only show you a snapshot of a moment in time - how long will you feel reassured for before waiting for next scan.

I don't think you're being unreasonable as such if the scans help but I would encourage you to seek some additional support with the anxiety issue prior to birth and afterwards, have you ever been under any support teams or even just the GP?

Good luck with your pregnancy! I hope it's super straightforward and everything goes to plan!

I think you would be better spending the money trying to help your anxiety before the baby comes.

Purely because let’s say you have a scan on the 6th of every month. What’s to stop you being scared on the 8th that something has happened since the scan on the 6th and spending the rest of the month anxious.

I think there’s a good chance this could increase you anxiety. But it’s ultimately your decision.

Ridiculous idea. It won’t tell you anything really and may do more harm than good if you’re relying on scans to tell you all is well. You still need to be aware if babies movements and what is normal or not. Pregnancy units are really good at seeing you if there are any concerns at all. I was anxious and went in several x for monitoring. I have had 2 pregnancies with anterior placentas. It’s about knowing babies normal patterns, not the amount of movement you feel.

It’s entirely up to you but IME, the snapshot of confirmation you’ll get on that day of your scan will not make you feel less anxious or crazy.
How else have you tried to manage your anxiety?

Why decide now? A lot can change each month during pregnancy. Personally I think scans are not that useful, they can cause concern where none is needed. With DC2 I was sent for growth scans due to concerns about my baby being very big, but DC was born on 50th centile with absolutely no issues during birth. The extra scans just caused me extra worry.

Have them as often as you want if it makes you feel better.

Really unreasonable. Spend the money on some counselling or therapy -before the baby is born. Do everything you can now to not pass your anxiety onto the baby. Anxious parents are damaging.

For how long after a scan will you feel content that baby is ok? Only you can answer that question, but if it's only a day or so then is it worth it?

I don't have experience with this, but it might be something you can discuss with your midwife. She won't be able to say yes or no to the scans as it's your decision, but she might have tips for managing the anxiety.

It certainly won't harm your baby if you do - ultrasounds are really safe. So if it will help your anxiety then do it - but I do wonder whether it really will. I'm in a slightly different situation because there are concerns about my baby so I have to have (NHS) scans every two weeks. It doesn't stop me worrying - I have to find other tools for that.

How far along are you now? If felt very anxious at first but it’s much better once you can feel kicks. I had an anterior placenta too, but by the time they’re bigger you can definitely feel them… you can see elbows sticking out of your bump. And feel their pokey little feet under your ribs.

Also when the baby is bigger you don’t see as much on the scan - I.e when they’re tiny you see the whole baby - when they’re bigger you see like one arm at a time because it fills the whole screen. So it’s not the same experience.

It sounds like you're just past 20 weeks? Some trusts do a scan around 34 weeks to check placental health - with DC1 it wasn't offered so we paid for it privately, with DC2 the NHS trust had since introduced it.
I would say every month is unnecessary and others have said won't actually help the root of your anxiety. But perhaps having just the one at what is a standard point (34-36 weeks) could be a way to reassure yourself without feeding the anxiety.

My experience is that the anxiety doesn’t stop once the baby arrives, it can feel even worse so I would instead look at ways of managing that

There’s evidence that the more you scan the more chance of the baby being left handed. Not a harm in itself (I’m a leftie myself), but I do wonder what else it could affect.

You’d be feeding the anxiety by doing this.

You need to do what feels right. I had scans every 2 weeks with my last baby. I was high risk with a very sad history and the hospital suggested it to reassure me that the baby was alive and well. And thank goodness he was born a healthy baby boy. It helped me stay sane following my sad history. Good luck.

I think all you’d be doing is feeding the anxiety which would then continue and escalate post-natally.

I think if you’re going to invest money on something, then looking into CBT or talking therapies to tackle your anxiety so you don’t transfer it to your child would be a far wiser use of money.

I have had a few early scans this time round due to multiple miscarriages. As someone said, they reassure you in the moment but the next day you are back to square one. Were you like this in early pregnancy? Your chances of miscarriage were many times higher then so it seems strange to be focusing on this period rather than then. I am really looking forward to my 12 week scan as after that I know my chances of miscarriage will have reduced again dramatically.

Honestly it would be a waste of money. Again, repeating someone else, spend the money on some sessions talking to someone to try and examine the root of your anxiety as this will help you with other things moving forward. Pregnancy can feel scary but so can having a newborn. There will always be something for you to feel anxious about.

I find meditation really helpful for my anxiety by the way

Is this your first baby? I found it a lot more reassuring once I could feel movements. I had an anterior placenta but felt movements from 20 weeks onwards.

Under the circumstances if it helps your anxiety then just do it as its not harming anybody. But you could think about counselling for anxiety. Its not uncommon for new mothers to be over anxious.

Id get some support with my anxiety instead what will you be like over feeding, sids risk etc once baby is here

I mean this kindly, speak to your midwife about this because theres a good chance when you have baby that it could transfer your anxiety to other things like whether the baby is breathing. I wouldn't say I generally get anxious but after baby was born I couldn't sleep because I was always panic stricken about whether she was breathing and I should have sought help.

I agree with others saying use the money for counselling If you are so anxious in pregnancy then this will be a million times worse when the baby is born. There are so many things to worry about with a new baby It's important that you can cope with a newborn and learn ways to deal with these worries.

Remember as your pregnancy goes along you'll get more regular midwife checks where they'll listen for the heartbeat etc. So there are still checks along the way.

Tracking your baby's movements would be a more effective way to ensure your baby is safe. The scan will show everything is fine for a few minutes, then it's over.

Plus you can track movements for free.