Does anyone else get really fed up with ropey fathers and their ‘rights’?
After a fling and a surprise baby (I was told I couldn’t have kids) I’ve got the baby I thought I’d never have and an absolute albatross around my neck with her father. I really would have loved a family for her but despite me trying really hard he ended it while I was pregnant. She’s now 8 months and apart from 2 asda trips I’ve been with her the whole time. It’s been extremely difficult financially and lonely/scary at times.
I’ve given him unlimited access to see her here at her home where she’s happy and comfortable. He won’t look after her for an hour on his own because she cry’s and he doesn’t know what to do with her, yet gets so angry and threatens court regularly because I won’t let him take her 100’s miles away to his hometown (The fact I won’t let him do that he’s refusing to allow me to take her on holiday with my mum 🙄) He asks regularly when I’m going to stop breastfeeding so he can take her away for weekends.He comes when he’s got nothing else to do, but won’t come for a week if he has plans. He’ll cancel 10 minutes before he’s due to see her, yet I’ll be in trouble if I can’t do a day he wants even though he won’t commit to same days/times each week. When he comes he spends an hour with her before he’s off again if there’s nothing to argue about. He’s never bought her a thing, not even a toy. All he’s interested in is getting her away from me…despite not knowing the first thing about how to care for her.
The level of frustration these stupid arguments cause are ruining me, I start shaking when I see a text or know he’s arriving. It’s like arguing with me is a sport. I suggested he sees her at my mums to minimise the arguing but I got court threats again…which he knows I struggle with.
I don’t want her around conflict, and I want her to have a good dad, and him to see her…but should your sanity be tested this much to get it?! 🤯 And if your gut says the baby’s best interests aren’t their primary concern what do you do?
From reading about it, he has all the ‘parental responsibilities’ that suit him, but none of the sacrifice that comes with being a single mum