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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Another Woman buying DD clothes

61 replies

Mam576 · 30/05/2022 08:13

My DD (6) went away with her dad this weekend. When she come home she said do you like my new jumper it’s off daddy’s friend. She said she is really nice and she likes children, and then she bought me lots of clothes.

I can’t help but feel strange about this, I mean it’s nice if this woman is nice , but I’ve never heard her name mentioned and DD spends time with her and gets lots of new things.

OP posts:

CreamyBruley · 30/05/2022 14:30

Yeah tell your ex to only go out with women who are horrible to his child in future. That'll be much better for your daughter than having another kind adult in her life.

Benjispruce4 · 30/05/2022 14:45

It deserves an explanation and new relationships need to be discussed with ex partners if they are going to meet the children. Basic consideration from both parties is a bare minimum.

Benjispruce4 · 30/05/2022 14:45

Ah @CreamyBruley are you the hotel owner?

coffeecupsandfairylights · 30/05/2022 15:07

Benjispruce4 · 30/05/2022 13:53

@coffeecupsandfairylights well that’s to be confirmed. If she is a friend then the ex should have clarified that for the child’s sake .

Well, the DD referred to her as "Daddy's friend". It's right there in the OP.

Catrice · 30/05/2022 15:19

Maybe handme downs rather than brand new? Perhaps she was going to give them to a charity shop but realised they'd fit your dd. Maybe she is actually just a friend of your ex.

Journey2TheMoon · 30/05/2022 15:28

Maybe he just has a female friend who was nice to his child? I'm really not sure what the problem is. He doesn't have to run everyone who meets your daughter by you first and I'm assuming you don't have any safe guarding concerns that this random woman kidnapped your daughter for a shopping trip i.e. her dad actually knows this woman and is clearly fine with the situation.

I get it must be weird but you can't control what he does and where he goes / with whom on his contact time.

At least your daughter seems happy enough. Why is it a problem?

Journey2TheMoon · 30/05/2022 15:30

Benjispruce4 · 30/05/2022 14:45

It deserves an explanation and new relationships need to be discussed with ex partners if they are going to meet the children. Basic consideration from both parties is a bare minimum.

No they don't need to be discussed. You may want them to be but actually the other parent doesn't need to run anything by you on their time with their child in the same way if OP met up with a friend with her daughter she wouldn't need to justify or explain it to her ex. Why is this any different?

Journey2TheMoon · 30/05/2022 15:35

Benjispruce4 · 30/05/2022 13:31

Buying a small gift if it’s a friend is fine. OP said it was the owner of the hotel and is a stranger and that she bought a pile of clothes. That’s odd.

She didn't say she was a stranger at all. Just because OP doesn't know her doesn't mean she's a stranger. The DD said she was daddy's friend maybe she is you know.... Her dad's friend.

Some people are so dramatic.

It's quite cheeky and probably aimed at buying affection and showing off at the same time. Fake mommy playing dress up type of thing. Not much you can do really.

Fucking hell 🤣🤣 maybe she just bought her friends kid a few treats to me nice? Calm down. Fake mommy playing dress up... Jesus Christ.

BadWolf2022 · 30/05/2022 15:36

Probably his new girlfriend.

Benjispruce4 · 30/05/2022 16:04

I think it’s the decent thing to do to discuss chn meeting new partners. The child may have questions and worries and both parents need to be aware who is around their child in a significant way.

Journey2TheMoon · 30/05/2022 16:14

Benjispruce4 · 30/05/2022 16:04

I think it’s the decent thing to do to discuss chn meeting new partners. The child may have questions and worries and both parents need to be aware who is around their child in a significant way.

She may not be his new partner. Does he need to discuss every friend who meets his child?

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