15 shirts a week

[theonlygirl]

DS2 starts big school in September, meaning there will be 15 shirts in the laundry each week. DH 5, DS1 5, DS2 5.
no issue washing and drying them but it will be a cold day in hell before I stand ironing their shirts. I don't use a tumbledryer so they all definitely need ironing.

Option 1 - make them iron their own.
Option 2 - drycleaners

Curious to know what others do

Gah!
I wish people would RTFT.

There is nothing wrong with making. A packed lunch for yourself when at school if you can.

But when it becomes your responsibility from the age of 11 (OPs DS age as an example) because the parent hates it and doesn’t want to, then no, not ok.

They are minors, your responsibility, they didn’t ask to be here and so by making them be wholly responsible for a standard, basic parental function (making edible meals for example at lunch) all the time is shitty, lazy parenting.

What the hell are all these parents doing of a morning if their kid is getting their own breakfast, making their own lunch (because they have to print won’t happen), preparing their uniforms etc??

What are they actually doing is they aren’t helping to provide the basics.

And feeding your kids a good nutritious meal isn’t tearing them like a King! Good bloody god!

It’s called being a decent mum.

And we’re not talking about adults are we? We’re talking about an 11 year FFs

The whataboutery on here is spectacular.

If men had to do their own ironing they would pretty soon workout what worked best for them. They would probably buy non-iron shirts or get them sent out.

As regards a previous poster saying they wouldn't let their DH/DCs go out in an un-ironed shirt, how very sad that you seem to believe this reflects on you. It reflects on them, in the same way that if they go out looking dirty or scruffy, it's on them. This is the patriarchy at play again - women you are responsible for how your partners look.

OP, why is it ok for your DH to not do ironing but your DCs must. I'd make them all do it or just send it out. 15 shirts a week, ridiculous.

M&S non-iron shirts. Get them straight onto hangers after being washed. No lingering in the washing machine. The school shirts look good. No need to iron.

My eldest son (aged 17) haas a friend whose mum made him do a lot from a young age!

Far more than necessary because ‘I don’t want to, he can do it himself’

Yes, he can do it himself, but the expectation that all basic but necessary daily functions and prep fell to him, has caused resentment!

He feels hard done by and was delighted when I made him and DS some steak and chips because they were hungry, and because I could and wanted to be nice!

He resents his mother greatly - years in the making! And he’s a lovely competent kid too.

This is an extreme example, but it’s worth telling.

No doubt some on here would see taking wages from a low warning teenager to contribute to the house as fair game too.

Earning (not warning)

For the children, get the non-ironing polyester combo ones. Depends on how old the sons are? Would they need a clean shirt every day? Until they start to hit puberty, they could at least go a couple of days (uniform comes off when they return home).
Husband could do his own.
Launderettes will charge more I would think than if you got someone in to iron for an hour or two a week?

There's also a fabric softener you can buy which reduces need for ironing. Now, it might not entirely reduce it, but it might make the job easier.

I happily ironed 25 shirts a week for many years. DH polished and cleaned 5 pairs of shoes plus 4 pairs football boots per week. Stuff needs maintaining to keep it looking good. I f you don't want to do it though, don't. Or pay someone else (dry cleaner, ironing service), or get everyone to do their own.

I rather liked the hour I spent ironing shirts for us all each week and got quite fast and good at it!

Apologies, I didn't notice somehow that there were pages of responses. What I've recommended has probably been suggested ten times already.

Your h needs to be responsible for his own clothes - he works king hours, he can get them cleaned and pressed by a dry cleaner, the older teen could do theirs or even better you all alternate, better still the boys both do their own or alternate.

*long, not king

Bloody hell @Quincythequince your son's friend sounds a right catch - NOT. Does he resent his Dad as well or do men not have to do these housekeeping type tasks as they are just for lowly women?

He’s 17 you plank! A child!

And has a mother that has done the bare minimum for him. Yes, he feels resentful! I don’t blame him tbh.

And his mum doesn’t work - so yes, the household stuff by agreement, falls to her. Or should at least!

Household stuff done for her and her DH, but not him, just because.

You sound like a right catch too love! He’s not even my kid but I’m offended on his behalf by your shitty comments

My M&D worked. In secondary school I was expected to do my own ironing for school along with a chunk of other household chores. Shirts were dried on a rack so not that creased TBH.

No way do I iron my DP shirts now. If it’s for a wedding or special occasion and because I’m better he’ll politely ask me to do it and I’m ok with that. I just don’t iron a lot of things these days, literally can go weeks.

What the hell are all these parents doing of a morning if their kid is getting their own breakfast, making their own lunch (because they have to print won’t happen), preparing their uniforms etc??

Getting ready for work mostly I would imagine, or sorting out younger siblings who still need parental help perhaps?

It is possible to be a good parent without being a complete martyr.

It's also very healthy for there to be an expectation of increasing responsibility for themselves for teenagers. Packed lunches and school uniform are a great place to start.

The DH can sort himself out and the DC won't care if things are ironed or not.

I find it a bit bizarre that people think ironing or hanging up laundry is something that needs to be learned. Nobody needs to iron and if they really want to as adults they will be able to work it out. Similarly, hanging things up is not difficult and does not need to be taught over many years.

Nobody needs to be a martyr it’s true.

But I tell you what, whilst my kids are minors, at home and at school and in my care, and I can make their life a little bit easier by helping out with a list of things to make their day run better (and when it comes to food preparation, healthier), I will continue to do so.

Basic parenting!

Any my house is hoovered, dishwasher loaded, dinner cooked, garden tidied and neat, contributed to by all three of them, as and when it works, in addition to me and my husband.

I will never outright refuse a role that a child needs fulfilled in their life, because I simply don’t want to do it and pass that onto them to make my life easier.

Shitty behaviour!

Me too!

And no, I don’t spoon feed them at all - as I’ve said now repeatedly.

But I do help take care of them, and expect the burden of that to fall to me whilst they are minors in my care!

Triggered people in this thread lol.

Getting a child to participate in their own food preparation and laundry washing is actually harder than doing it myself, in many ways. They require reminding and supervision, advice and reminding again. But they also really enjoy the feeling of independence they get from doing it themselves.

None of that is abdication of parental responsibility, nor is it shitty behaviour. 😊

Not sure whether 17 is a child. But I don't think a 17 year old should have to do absolutely everything for themselves if they are in high school.

One of my friends moved out of home at 16. He still went to the sixth form though. He lived on his own. Did all of his own cleaning and laundry.
I know this is unusual now. We didn't see it as unusual.
In the area I was in for high school, rents were extremely cheap.

Anyway, in answer to the original question. No, I wouldn't want an 11 year old child routinely ironing shirts. I think it's fine to teach them, but not for them to take responsibility for ironing their own clothes. And yes, I can see some children and young adults needing a clean shirt every day. Some play football in breaks and lunch time in their school uniform for example. As I can see some not needing a clean shirt every day, i.e. use your own judgement. We don't want to wash things unnecessarily but sometimes it IS necessary!

Just get the kids the non iron ones and hang them up.

You can get them for adults too, so tell you husband to do that or iron himself (assuming you aren’t a FT housewife or only have a PT job.)

if you are ironing your husbands shirts for him, unless there’s a fair reason, you aren’t teaching your kids good lessons about equality.

Surely by the time kids are year 6 you don’t talk to them about ‘big school’…. That sounds so embarrassing and babyish 😄 cringe! Around here ‘big school’ is what you say to nursery children starting reception, so I see where the confusion lay.

Dry them on coat hangers. No need to iron.

Getting your kids to make their packed lunches and iron their shirts when they are of an age to be able to isn’t being a bad parent - it’s teaching your kids life skills.

You might choose not to, but that doesn’t make other people bad parents if they do.

Don’t be so stupid / arrogant. There is more than one good way to parent, and however we do it, part of the job is gradually getting kids to start looking after themselves.