I probably am. But it’s really irritating

[Panda368]

this is 100% not a real problem. I know other people have bigger problems I just want to know if this is normal?

So we have a family wattsapp group as most people do. My family are pretty scattered and everyone is more that 100 miles from everyone else so we don’t see each other that often.

On the group both my mum and my dad will reply to messages with just a single emoji - either the 😃 or 👍 and I’m struggling a bit with how rude I find this as from my perspective it kills all further chat completely. They will ask a question, I write an answer and then there is absolutely no effort on their part afterwards except the thumbs up emoji? Or I send a pic of one of the grandchildren I may get just an emoji back or question I write a decent reply and then they just send a fucking emoji.
None of my other groups or people I message regularly who are similar ages to me do this.
Is this just that they don’t quite get text etiquette? is it even bad text etiquette?

Maybe they are busy but still thinking of you?!!🤷‍♀️

@Panda368

It wasn’t my intention to sound snarky, just got a sense there was something else and now understand a little more from your recent post.

It’s hard with a baby and toddler. Maybe have a think why you’re stressed visiting them, what you can do (if anything) and why you don’t feel they’re interested in you.

My sister has a v strained relationship with my parents. One reason for that is she thinks they’re uninterested in her/ family. Knowing the personalities and specific incidents I could see it from both sides. I remember saying to her once when she was v upset/angry, just because they’re our parents doesn’t mean they are everything we want them to be. Sometimes that’s a hard realisation as an adult as we still want to be patented. Different situation but thought I’d share.

good luck 😊

*parented

The phone works both ways

I do this, maybe it’s because I’m dyslexic. Also, and I can’t stress this enough, I cannot be arsed to engage by text or any kind of messenger service at all. It requires to much effort to condense a reply to fit the medium. Call or email if you want more from me than just an emoji or Gif. Maybe your parents feel the same way.

OP I think the texting issue and the not feeling your parents have much interest in you are two completely separate issues that you have merged in your head meaning the messages are almost proof of the issues with your parents.

I honestly think the texting thing is just a quirk of that age group! My parents aren’t in their 60’s yet but they have a similar messaging style if not quite identical. Messages between me and my parents are always just a few words back and forward, a funny comment here, an emoji there but messages with friends can be almost pages long at times!

We need to remember that for our parents this ‘newfangled’ way of being kept in the loop with children/grandchildren is completely new to them in the sense that it’s not something they would have done themselves at our age with their own parents so we probably just don’t have aligning expectations.

For them I bet they think it’s a lovely way to get a quick update regarding the new baby/toddler grandson etc and they can acknowledge it in a positive way and move on with their day with a smile on their face. There can’t be many that would get that a thumbs up, while perfectly acceptable (if somewhat cheesey) in real life - is by many, absolutely frowned upon if used in a message. It’s a nuance that probably just isn’t there for most.

If you were having more regular and fulfilling catch ups with them and the texts were just added extras I’m sure it wouldn’t cut quite so deep but if this is your main method of communication I can see why it’s getting to you even though you already know they aren’t doing it intentionally to hurt you.

For what it’s worth - we don’t even have a family whatsapp group, that’s how little we have to say to each other!! And I feel similar to you in that I don’t think my parents are interested in me as an adult - but what can you do about that? Not much I don’t think.