Why are teenagers so destructive?

[Tinkerblonde1]

Not all teenagers of course. The majority are great but the mindless destruction. Why?

Last night an old garden seat in my summer house was burnt in three places by a 14 year old boy. Friend of dd. ( not anymore)

I am a teacher and in the last week. A boy has stamped on a pen until it shattered. Another banging cupboard doors over and over. Board displays ripped down, rubbish thrown. Glue stick pulled apart and thrown at the ceiling.

My dd has also noted a teenager walking around with a dead squirrel in the local park. Flower beds being destroyed.

My friends daughter went to a party they stole food. One sat on the kitchen work top and it collapsed. My friends daughters phone was thrown out of the window and stomped on.

I know its not a new thing. My garden chair was ten years old but its not the point. I am noticing it more am my dd is that age now.

Just not something I would ever do myself even as a stroppy teen. I can't understand the mindset.

Their brains aren't formed yet and they are like overgrown toddlers.

I have had things wrecked that are quite new...i hope she grows out of it.

I'm 50-something & still occasionally wreck something. <shrug>

You go to work and stamp on pens do you @Ragged ?

I hear you @Tinkerblonde1 , the mindless destruction of things gets to me as well. We’ve had to close the playing fields as everything gets destroyed.

Often stated but not true.

Internet, social media, the culture they’re ensconced in… too many of them want to be nothing more than destructive because it’s so cool.
There’s always been poor parenting, but destructive teens are on the rise from what I’m seeing.

I’m fortunate that my DS didn’t ever behave like this. He had some clumsy (exuberant) friends growing up, but nothing major happened.

One person's mindless destruction is someone else's simple carelessness.

I am careless sometimes, yes. I haven't reached the pinnacle of perfection that so many MNers live comfortably with. Except they're all seemingly fraught with anxiety. Maybe not so comfortable.

Most the people being antisocial in town centres on weekend evenings aren't teenagers. Adults can do mindless destruction on occasion.

Some of the stuff in the first post isn't wanton vandalism though - sitting on a work top, banging doors? Taking food from a party they're attending? I've done all those and it's a long time since I was a teen-ager.
Some of the other stuff is just stupidity - I can remember our class getting in trouble 'cos some of them for in trouble for throwing clay at the ceiling (early 80's)
But yeah, burning people's possessions and wandering around with dead animals is worrying.

Teenagers are a bloody pain, mine do my head in but underneath it they are kind and know right from wrong.

It appears some are just damn right horrible, no empathy, no kindness just tunnel vision me, me, me.

I've removed my DS from school due to bullying, his bullies appear to have no moral compass but then everyone stands back and watches. Probably thinking thank god it's not me. Police are currently involved and the bullies couldn't give a shit.

Sorry I've gone off at a tangent! YANBU and I don't know what the answer is.

They are like adolescent puppies.

Place near us Rhos on sea n Wales it's escalating it's a retirement area, started with eggs, car mirrors,. Last week the primary school five arrested, this week the cricket club pavilion burnt down three arrests. It's in the media now. Police seem unable to nip it in the bud so it's geared up. On FB locals say they know who they are, phone police daily but nothing is done they say.

I think often they don't/can't think through the consequences of their actions. Something seems like a bit of a laugh, or they genuinely want to find out what happens if.... They are just not mature enough to think of all the possible outcomes.

Some is genuine clumsiness - like toddlers some have to adjust to sudden growth spurts and their new proportions and strength.

Some are just little shits.

I find it very annoying too - I can think of reasons, ie. banging the cupboard door in school could be sensory seeking behaviour that might be reassuring a pupil who is becoming overwhelmed (or they could be being a knob, hard to say).

I don’t think pens and glue sticks really register with some pupils as ‘things’ cos they assume there’s an endless free supply - I think school culture can start to challenge that (as in I didn’t see much of that in schools where there was a high standard of behaviour overall) but I also think you’re fighting against a culture in which there is a sense that ‘stuff’ is super cheap and easily replaceable. In my school (AP) we send bills home and it’s probably the most effective behaviour measure we’ve found so far. Some of the destructive behaviour we see is sensory, a lot of it pure thoughtlessness/impulsiveness and some of it deliberate.

the dead squirrel is weird but also I can imagine teenagers i went to school with being ‘edgy’ with something like that. Also the flower beds, it’s very uncool but to some teens it’s a rebellious assertion of … something.

@Ragged no one is talking about carelessness. It isn’t say drop a pen and tread on it carelessly, which is annoying but different to purposefully stamping on a pen.

I have a student who can’t work in an exercise book as she just tears all the pages out (and leaves them in balls around the room.) I have to give her paper every lesson, it’s crazy.

We are a very new building. There were once soft chairs for students to sit on - no more as they ripped the fabric and took the soft spongy stuff from inside out and threw it around. Of course most of them wouldn’t dream of doing that but the ones who do ruin it for everyone else.

Yy. There's quite a difference between throwing glue at the ceiling to see if it sticks ... and walking around with a dead squirrel

I'm surprised at what's happening in Rhos on sea, it seems like such a nice place on the surface. You'd expect that sort of thing in Rhyl however!

Bored and full of energy. Perhaps we should lower the school leaving age back down to 14 and send them out to work. A lot of them would prefer that.
(Semi light-hearted - but also possibly semi true)

They can be impulsive and highly influenced by their peers which can lead to things getting out of hand esp if alcohol is involved, but I wouldn't expect mine to engage in the mindless destruction of property or vandalism and they were taught to take responsibility for their actions from a young age. I do think a lot of kids are brought up not to take responsibility for anything and then in the teen years the wheels can come off spectacularly.

@Needmorelego it's an intriguing idea but who would want to emoy them and to do what?

employ

I blame you tube for some of it.
My young child watches several people on there and thr main one he watches is unspeakable who deliberately wreaks things and films it thinking its all a big laugh! I do not get it at all-and tell my son not to watch the mindless destructive videos.
They grow up watching that and we'll...

I started work at 15 and you were expected to behave like an adult. I was so much more grown up at that age than the 15 year olds I see nowadays.

@TATT22
“I have a student who can’t work in an exercise book as she just tears all the pages out (and leaves them in balls around the room.) I have to give her paper every lesson, it’s crazy.”

Found this quite interesting as that sounds like a sensory/anxiety issue to me - we quite often get paper tearing or scrunching in my setting. In an instance like this I think giving paper is a perfectly workable solution- but I know what mainstream schools can be like (fussy) which is why I like AP.

tbh I think the soft chairs are asking for trouble 😂 I think every foam armchair I ever can across in my standard comprehensive secondary school looked like it had awful woodworm. Tbf it IS satisfying to dig the foam out. They should have seen that coming!

@Porcupineintherough put em in the fields picking crops 😂