To feel irritation at people who buy you cleaning products

[greensquirlyma]

It's happened on and off over years that MIL and SIL will randomly buy me and DH cleaning products. There's only ever been one product that I've found to be indispensable. All the others I've not continued to use and prefer my own choices. I've had a word with DH and he says that they probably like using the products so want to share them. But it feels to me like they're implying I don't clean.

What did they say when you asked them to stop?

Find a hobby.

They probably get them on offer and want to share the love.

Some people are nice like that, don't overthink that.

If I asked them to stop, I'd probably be the devil incarnate ... 'ungrateful', 'we were only trying to help', that sort of thing. That's why I had a word with DH. They're actually wasting their money as I've thrown products out because they're no good.

Weird. No-one has ever bought me cleaning products.

Why are you throwing them out?

Our food bank takes cleaning products so maybe just smile and nod and donate if you can’t tell them to pack it in.

I can't imagine buying someone cleaning products. That's so weird. What do they say when they give them to you? I would definitely take it as a veiled dig at my housekeeping if there was no other context.

Good suggestion about food bank thanks.

The way it goes is that when they visit they'll be carrying the item and place it on the table with a brief 'got this for you' or likewise and then change the topic. Honestly, it feels like how someone would feel if people continued to buy you mints - you'd think you have bad breath.

Next time, just hand them back and say "Oh, I'm not a fan of this".
Sure, it's rude but at least you'll get your point across and they'll stop.
Ignore any comments back from them.

Or just stick them all in a bag and hand them back to them when they are leaving and say you prefer your own brand.

I'd leave it to DH. He can have the product and clean with it if he wants. I wouldn't care what they think of my home as long as I was happy with it. The whole thing is odd - no one's ever bought me cleaning products and I'd be very clear that it was of zero interest to me if they did. At most I'd say great, DH will love it! And then talk about more interesting things. Probably with someone other than them!

I have not experienced this. I would find it rude. Could you save them up and give them back to them in a hamper at Xmas?

'Got this for you!'

Your response should be one of these three -

A. Why?
B. Thank you but I bought that once before and it was crap.
C. Oh that's lovely, thank you. I'll drop it off for the food bank along with my unwanted l/spare items.
D. Thank you for the cleaning product. I feel bad that you're always buying me cleaning products so I'm going to start treating you - here's some spot cream/stretch mark lotion/dandruff shampoo.

This has never happened to me

They are implying you don't clean enough....
Otherwise they wouldn't buy them.
Is your place not up to their standards?
They sound very rude to be honest.

Tell them to stop if you don't want the products.

Get a lif e. If someone's gift offends you, just give them a sex toy and some lube.

Are they actually trying to politely tell you it needs a clean? I've never been given cleaning products so struggling to imagine why anyone would do this. I'd politely turn them down with a Thanks but I prefer X instead.

My mil used to do it, I failed the standards of hygiene expected apparently.

I've been running a household for 30 years. No one's ever bought me a cleaning product, ever.

That said I think I'd take it at face value. They've found a product helpful and want to share. If you don't love it, give it back. "I didn't get ion with this one thanks, you use it rather than see it go to waste"..

If they are implying that your house needs cleaning, you don't have to let them know you know.

You could do or you could just donate them to the food bank and not create I'll feeling where I bet none was intended.

Weird. No-one has ever bought me cleaning products.

Me neither.

My MIL once said that my SIL (her DD) used to take her cleaning products to show her when she visited for the weekend but take them home with her when she left. I think some people are just odd.

It wouldnt bother me, it’s something that would happen in my family. My Aunty sent me some fabreeze type spray via my cousins DP once. Now my auntys never been to my house, but I’m fairly confident she knows full well I have a clean house, but she would have spoken to my cousins DP who said she was visiting me and thought it would be something nice and particle to send to me. Both my parents were obsessive neat and clean freaks and would regularly bring things like cleaning products over or buy me some washing powder as these things are far more useful than a bunch of flowers.

I come from a very poor background so randomly buying someone something that is necessary would be seen as a nice gesture not an insult.

This made me smile. I wouldn't have the nerve though.

My MIL gave me soda crystals for laundry before, I didn't think she was implying my clothes were dirty! She just said she finds them great for washing very dirty clothes ( DH and FIL are farmers). I said thank you.

If it's the same as my MIL it's prob I like this so I thought you might too. She also sends home random articles from newspapers she thinks might interest me. I think it's nice she thinks of me.