Is it even worth trying to lost weight?

[toolatetoloseweight]

I am currently in the obese range and about 4 stone over my healthy weight. I basically put on loads of weight in my first pregnancy (6 years ago) and I've never managed to shift it.
I was previously a healthy weight but was a fat child and have always struggled a bit with putting on weight very easily.

I keep reading stats saying how unlikely it is for an obese woman to ever lose the weight and keep it off without bariatric surgery - and it is making me wonder if it is even worth trying at this stage...

For context, I am relatively active - walk the dog twice a day, swim twice a week, run around after kids, occasionally go for a run (3-5km so not massive distances but just to put in context that I'm not so big as to be struggling to get around). I dont have a terrible diet (though obviously could be better!). i know from experience that small changes don't make a difference to me- I need to eat under 1200 calories to lose. I am terribly unhappy with the way I look and dread going out and being see by people. However not sure if it is all just a losing battle at this stage...

I unsuccessfully tried MFP and calorie counting. MFP had too many variables ie 2 x beans on buttered toast had different calories to toast + butter + beans × 2. Maybe its different these days.
I was brought up the old fashioned way, you can't have a pudding unless you finish your dinner. I carried this into adulthood, if I wanted a chocolate bar I made myself eat something savoury first, even if it was a bag of crisps!
I worked long shifts on a ward, and got into the habit of eating when I wasn't hungry, whenever I had a spare 5 minutes, stuffing myself at lunch time and having a big meal when I got home.
I then got whooping cough, followed by non stop respiratory infections, I was off work for 6 months and ate non stop through boredom. I was due a double mastectomy but I was too ill for the anaesthetic.
I stepped on the scale and was horrified to see that I was 14 stone. That was my turning point. I wanted to be fit to recover from my surgery.
I followed loosely the low carb bootcamp on here. Stopped eating bread, biscuits, cakes, chocolate, pasta, pastry.
I found it really easy as I was never hungry.
The weight literally fell off me, I started walking every day and did HIIT routines 3 x pw.
Six months later I hit the scales at 8.10, the lightest I've ever been.
I'm now at 9.7 simply because I'm unable to exercise as much as I used to because of some disabilities, but I still low carb and most days 16:8. The only time I crave rubbish is if I get a migraine.
Low carb is not cutting a food group out, just making better carb choices.

I tried and failed at calorie counting/ MFP because I found it too restrictive, I would feel hungry and after a few days would sabotage it because I felt so miserable. I couldn't see how I could possibly lose weight if I couldn't even stick to it for a week!

Last ditch attempt, I was obese most of my adult life, I joined SW.
I know it's not for everyone, but for me it worked. I don't eat much processed food now, although I do still snack, and I never feel hungry.
My BMI is 23 and people are telling me I've lost enough.
I still can't believe I'm a healthy weight, I keep expecting to wake up big again.
Friends of mine have tried SW and didn't like it, they do calorie counting instead, they said SW is too restrictive, which is the exact opposite for me, so I really think it's a case of finding out what works for you as an individual.

Low carb is cutting or restricting a food group and an energy source. No one is going to advise putting pastry or cake as a food group these are processed sugary carbs. Pulses, beans and grains are a food group. You can eat sensible amounts of brown bread or Wholegrain pasta/rice, with health benefits and they are not empty useless carbs. Food is fuel. Where are you guys getting any fibre from. Can you actually go to the toilet. I’m concerned for all of your bowels ya know. Yeah; low carb gave me migraines too. Might be a sign

the weight fell off you becasue you were not eating sugary processed foods and exercising a lot. Well done, but you can do that eating carbs. FYI

hi Op, ignore PP saying fasting is unsustainable. It's one of the most sustainable, easy (and natural) ways to maintain weight loss. 1 - 2 days a week restricted eating (e.g. OMAD) as a habit forever is enough for most people to maintain any weight loss and it keeps you mindful about your calories forever without needing to restrict 100% of the time (so some treats or wild days are allowed!). And it is easy once you get used to it. And it is very very good for you, and completely natural and what humans have done for hundreds of thousands of years. Man was not made to eat all the time and has always historically had periods of sustained no-eating.

Regarding loose skin, fasting also gets rid of this if you do it right. Google "autophagy, fasting and loose skin" to find out more. Once you've fasted a bit your body enters a mode whereby it is able to use up excess skin, get rid of bad cells etc, clear up infections. You need to enter a certain period of fasting for it to occur, which is why a couple of days a month are recommended. But even if you're doing OMAD, some autophagy occurs. It is one of the healthiest thing all humans can do (even if obese or not). The fasting subreddit has a lot of info on it. And if you enter an extended fast your body is also able to produce growth hormones and new stem cells, so it is life extending and anti ageing! (This happens at like 3 - 4 days, so should be done with care).

And also to mention - muscles do not waste away when you're fasting. Again check out Jason Fung on this. It's a common myth. Although doing some mild strength and resistance traning while fasting is recommended.

Low carb has worked brilliantly for me. Have maintained current healthy weight for 4 years now. I’ll occasionally have pasta, bread etc. if I want it. People can dismiss it, but it has been a revelation for me.

I really appreciate all the comments and they certainly go to show that there are different ways to do it. I don't think any of the approaches suggested are wrong as they work for different people.

I would say though that the number of calories needed by people does vary massively. When I am not actively trying to lose weight, it is still unusual for me to eat more than 2000 cals per day. When I say I can only lose on 1200, I really have tried all sorts of variations and I do track carefully. I don't know if it's genetics or that our metabolism just gets fucked up from weight yo yoing - but honestly some of us just can't eat a normal diet and take moderate amount of activity and get to a healthy weight. By normal I mean a regular balanced 1800- 2000 calories, of mostly unprocessed, healthy foods, your 5 a day etc, and a few treats or a dessert thrown in every now and and again. By normal activity I mean approx 10,000 steps per day plus a couple of other bits like a swim or a run or a gym session a couple of times a week. I wish I could do that, but if I did I would just get even bigger.

For me, I am not keen on keto or super low carb because I know it isn't sustainable for me. However, I have had some success in the past with lowish carbs and 1000-1200 calories. But it is rubbish. I agree with a pp who mentioned about doing strength training - I did used to do this in the past when I was a better weight but I had a gym buddy and we could spot each other on weights. I need to see if I can find something that I can do alone.

When I am not actively trying to lose weight, it is still unusual for me to eat more than 2000 cals per day. When I say I can only lose on 1200, I really have tried all sorts of variations and I do track carefully. I don't know if it's genetics or that our metabolism just gets fucked up from weight yo yoing - but honestly some of us just can't eat a normal diet and take moderate amount of activity and get to a healthy weight. By normal I mean a regular balanced 1800- 2000 calories, of mostly unprocessed, healthy foods, your 5 a day etc, and a few treats or a dessert thrown in every now and and again. By normal activity I mean approx 10,000 steps per day plus a couple of other bits like a swim or a run or a gym session a couple of times a week. I wish I could do that, but if I did I would just get even bigger.

Are you very short or do you have thyroid issues? What you’re describing doesn’t sound right.

Diets DO work. The problem is that when people reach their goal weight, they stop the diet and go right back to how they used to eat.

The best diet is the calorie counting one. When I lost 12st over the course of 2 years, I used MyFitnessPal to calorie count (and went out for lots of long walks) and started with it set to lose 2lbs a week, then when I'd lost 3 stone set it to 1.5lbs a week etc etc until I had it set to 0.5lbs a week. I left it there, but eventually didn't even need the app, as you start to learn what healthy portion sizes actually are.

I managed to keep it off for almost a decade, until lockdown happened and I pretty much had a mental breakdown and started comfort eating again. But they were such unusual times I can't hate myself for it. I am back on MyFitnessPal now and the weight is gradually coming off again!

I believe you op. Do have a look at the Andrew Jenkinson book. He talks about patients who come to him eating far fewer calories than others who weigh much less than them but are struggling to lose weight.

Of course it's worth trying to lose weight, but you have to want to! There is no easy route and you need to be strong and focus on the benefits of being slimmer and feeling better/healthier. After a while, the motivation comes from losing weight and should spur you on. Getting started is probably the hardest part.

I think for many it's a case of deciding on what's more important - eating whatever yo want in any quantity you like or getting down to a healthy weight with all of the associated mental and physical health benefits? Once the decision is made, you're on your way, but you have to put the effort in.

Being aware of calories is important as then you can decide what to eat and recognise how calories can add up quickly when you've no idea about them!

I'm currently losing weight on the Fast diet. I find it works for me and have used it before. About a month ago, I had a bit of a moment where I realised that the only way to get rid of my stomach was to diet (exercise alone wasn't working). I don't usually weigh myself, but when I did at the start of this regime, I was shocked to find myself the heaviest I've ever been at 12 st 5 lbs. Ideal weight for me would be around between 11 and 11.5 stone (I'm 5'9"). Anyway, after four weeks of fast diet and mindful eating, I've lost 10lbs and currently at 11st 9lbs on this morning's weigh in! This is what motivates me.

I do really feel for you
if you have had your thyroid checked then it isn’t a metabolic issue. They are rare. I do also find I need to eat lower calories the older I get and it sucks. This is why they say strength training is good to work on your muscles and therefore increase your BMR/TDEE. Please ignore some of this mind bending science thrown at you 🤣. There is no mode your body enters when you don’t eat and no magic skin diet. Weight loss can be really slow. You think you can’t see it but it’s happening. When you talk about previous attempts, how long was the period of time? Yes you lose quickly to begin with (water a lot of it) then it slows down. Even 0.5lb a week is a loss. Did you measure your body parts to see a difference? Basically I am losing 4 stone and for me it’s going to be an entire year of commitment for that weight loss then I will have to work at maintenance levels. Firstly I addressed my issues with food and how I felt about myself. Then I committed to changing my food, now I am going to commit to more exercise. It was all slow and it will take a while, but you can do it if you are consistent

How long do you stick with 1200 calories before giving up? It’s unsustainable for a long period of time. I read that the quickest way to lose weight is the slowest and that really resonated. You need a fairly small calorie deficit to ensure you’re not hungry, or get fed up. It’s consistency over an extended period of time that will make the difference. There’s no rush, the time will pass anyway. May as well make the process as easy on yourself as possible.

autophagy Is not meant to be a diet fad
also hasn’t it mostly been tested on mice?
if you want to fast, great. Lots of people do it for religious reasons. You do it when you go to sleep at night.

you should always consult a health professional before doing anything drastic like fasting as you can make yourself unwell if you have any underlying health conditions. Not eating gives me migraines and stomach ache and OP already said she didn’t want to do it

I've worked in gyms for 20 years and seen so many people on fitness and diet missions that have failed.
In my experience, the people who succeed in losing weight and keeping it off are those who eat sensible portions of whole foods (limit processed stuff and empty calories, but please note I say limit and not eliminate), find an exercise you like and do it 3-4 times a week, sleep properly.
It's about living a balanced life and not viewing food or exercise as either treat or punishment. They are both just things that your body needs in reasonable amounts. Too much or too little of either will mess you up.

Yup, weight gain is a biological process. Not about physics and not about maths. It’s to do with hormones, mainly insulin.

Sadly many, like yourself, are invested in “cals in-out”. Yet we are getting fatter (well I’m not but society is). So it’s clearly a failure but once invested, people find it hard to let go.

You really really are talking sense!

I keep trying to tell my mum this. She's in awe of how much weight I've lost (2 and a bit stone but still another stone ish to go I reckon) but won't listen at all when I tell her I'm not dieting. It's taken a year to lose because I've just slowly reduced my calories every month or so while upping my gym time. Because it's not a quick fix and I didn't drop it in a month she's not interested bless her.

OP, as others have mentioned it’s definitely worth checking to see if you have an underactive thyroid. I do, but haven’t found taking the medication to be a magic bullet. It helps to understand why I was always more sluggish and prone to being overweight though.
When it comes to losing weight I honestly think that slow and steady wins the race. It’s not the answer anyone wants to hear, but it’s true.
Think about it - if you cut out all wheat, for example, you may find you lose some weight. And if you decided to go for a 5k run every morning before breakfast you’d burn loads of calories. But are you able to stick to those changes for the rest of your life? If not, then it’s not a long term solution.
But perhaps you can commit to making another change, such as swapping that 11am slice of toast for a couple of pieces of fruit (not saying you eat that, it’s just an example). And perhaps you could add in a weekly yoga class or extra run/walk.
Even if you only lost 1 or 2lbs a month, it would add up and you’d get there overtime. More importantly, you will have taught yourself new habits that last for good.

Eating less than 1200 calories a day indefinitely doesn't sound sustainable or worth it to me. I'd up the exercise and give up chocolate, crisps, buns and cakes. Perfectly doable, realistic and should with time make you lose weight and get healthier at the same time. Eating less than 1200 calories a day would just make me fixate on food and I'd put on weight in the long run.

I’m not sadly anything

you have no idea what you are even talking about describing science processes

hormones are chemicals
thermodynamics is physics
the biology of humans is that we are mammals, our genetics etc

inside mammals there are chemicals and these undergo different processes, chemical changes and the laws of physics apply to how organs and chemical work together.

all 3 things combined together make a human function

i mean this is like basic GCSE science

weight gain is often, usually, psychological. Some humans have a limited ability to control their weight, those who do may have health conditions or take medications that affect their absorption, appetite or cause hormone imbalances.

Mostly people are overweight because there is an abundance of cheap food and it makes you feel good to eat it. It’s very hard to tackle these psychological issues when you are making yourself intentionally hungry or reinforcing the idea that some foods are ‘bad’ or that you have NO control over your weight as it’s all ‘your hormones’. This is why women fail. We just need to be honest that it is hard work. Your metabolism isn’t making you eat high calorie, high fat foods. Your metabolism isn’t going to change after 3 weeks of cutting out carbs. Your hormones are linked, I’m not disagreeing with you but you have more insight into the psychological difficulties of weight loss if you are actually fat or have been fat than if you follow weird dudes online who are selling books about hormones to make money. I’m not making any money or selling anything. You are trying to direct people to a YouTube millionaire who no one actually needs

I'm currently reading this which you might find interesting: www.amazon.co.uk/How-Glucose-Goddess-life-changing-balancing/dp/178072523X/ref=asc_df_178072523X/?tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=534959025250&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=10930516057153232858&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9046134&hvtargid=pla-1435242129024&psc=1&th=1&psc=1

I think losing weight is so much easier if your blood sugar isn't going up and down, it gives that hungry sugar craving feeling that makes it so hard to stick to a lower calorie diet. I personally am useless at calorie counting and find it soul destroying but find after a few days low carb, the feeling of hunger just goes away. It's worth a try even if you don't do it perfectly.

The world of diet culture is fixated on "quick fix" but it's just not the reality of life.

I always say reduce your intake by 15% in the first instance and then wait for the plateau and then reduce again by 15%. And so on. I wouldn't advise anyone cut to 1200 immediately.

Now some people may find they can gradually reduce down to 1200 or 1500 based on their lifestyle and own metabolism.

But most women will find by the time they've reduced to about 1800 a day they are at a healthy weight and maintaining, especially with more movement and excercise in their life.

Carb cutting for women without a insulin resistance I wouldn't recommend. Low GI eating habits can be great for some women, but you aren't cutting carbs you are still eating sweet potatoes and brown rice on this index.

Also smashing out 7 cardio sessions a week, is not sustainable. I'd aim for gradual increase in excercise. Start twice a week, get moving, then up to 3. Or start by simply walking 15-20 minutes an evening and build up to maybe a jog 3 times a week. And a weekend walk.

Balance. Gradual, long term.

But most importantly enjoyable. Don't become a slave to the diet culture. Enjoy your life, find that balance of what works for you as a individual. 2 gym classes a week and 1800 calories great, or 5 gym sessions a week and 2000 calories. Great.

It needs to be a realistic lifestyle change of eat less move more. Not eat drastically reduced amounts and move excessively, you'll burn out. And not starve and get fed up.

Be kind to yourself, slow and steady wins the race.

Sorry, losing track a bit of who said what but answering a few questions:

I did fast 800 (so 800 call per day) for 3 months last year, lost two stone.

I did eating 1000-1200 calories per day 5 days a week (didn't count at weekend) for around 18 months a good few years back. I had only been a couple of stone overweight at the start of that and I lost the weight in about 9 months then maintained. During most of that time I was also going to the gym 4-5 times per week. I then got pregnant, which is when it all went a bit to pot. (that baby is now 6 so can't exactly blame it on baby weight though!)

I truly appreciate everyone who has taken time to reply but the comments along the lines of trying to eat 1800 calories and/or just move a bit don't work for me. That is pretty much my standard lifestyle - so I absolutely need to do more to see a change. I did also try going for just 1500 calories for around 3 months as I was reluctant to drop further than that as I was breastfeeding at the time. And it did nothing at all.

In which case, I'd say book an appointment with the GP to discuss your concerns or even the practice nurse. Maybe keep a food diary for the weeks leading up to the appointment so you can present to the health care practitioner and say this is what I eat, this is how I excercise and still no change.

They may be able to run some tests, check your thyroid and so on to ensure no underlying medical condition.

At 1500 and regular excercise you should either be maintaining or loosing.

I'd just try and cover all basis. Many GP clinics have a "loosing weight clinic" often run by the nurse and hopefully they can shed some light. 💐

drink more water and just keep going, you will get there in the end, sometimes you need to jiggle your exercise around a bit as your body gets used to what you are doing, the more water I drank my results were more xx

@ObjectionHearsay
I'm hearing you loud n clear.

Slow n steady, I need to get that gym membership sorted. You are absolutely right everyone wants to loose it in 12 weeks.

Of my 3st I want to loose 1, was gained in 12 weeks working away from home, the other 2, over 12 years (inc two babies ).
I do one gym session and think I should be my best weight ever of 9st.

Maybe that's what's hard, my diet isn't completely wild, other than first few months away from home, drinking, and hotel puddings.